Collected Essays of Valerie Lynn Stephens

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

COLLECTED ESSAYS OF VALERIE LYNN STEPHENS

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored or introduced into a retrieval system, transmitted in any form or by any means (including electronic, photocopying, mechanical, manual or otherwise) without the prior express & written consent of the owner of the copyright of this book.

ISBN: 978-1-365-35197-6

©2021 Valerie Lynn Stephens

 

 

 

 

 

 

ON THE MORAL IMPERATIVE OF CRITICAL THINKING NURTURANCE & DEVELOPMENT

 

 

What we refer to as ‘equilibrium’ is really a constant state of polarised flux. Or, stated another way: There is no such thing as ‘chaos’, rather, a state of invariable transition from one ‘phase’ or ‘state’ to the next. What human beings undergoing daily self-examination, growth and learning often experience can be quite frightening and painful when both exoteric and esoteric states of consciousness are misapprehended as anomaly or pathology. Indeed, this is no wonder, as steeped as Western culture has become in the Cartesian model of analysis practiced by both the ‘hard’ and ‘soft’ sciences, and the so-called ‘layman’ in general. Furthermore, human beings are, by nature, both complex and fragile creatures. And this by extension also makes us both hyper-rational and irrational.

 

Indeed, even when we claim to be ‘rationalising’, as we say, a certain cognition and/or behaviour, we are using anything but pure logical induction and/or deduction, antiquatedly referred to as “Reason” to arrive at our conclusions. So, why is this subject so important, you may wonder? Clearer thinking is imperative because it is the cornerstone of all moral and ethical edifices and hence, a better world for all. As within, so without. That is to say, a genuine seeker of Truth and Justice will always follow suit with a refinement of their own critical thinking faculties. They do this knowing that if they improve their own understanding of themselves, others and the world at large, they will be more capable of making prosocial decisions both for themselves and, by ontologically organic extension, others.

 

 

This is why so many oppressive regimes militantly suppress any attempts by its ‘subjects’, to elevate themselves or to refine their reasoning faculties. And, this tactic of dominance and subjugation is at work in all forms of so-called ‘government’ including many ‘democracies.’ It is merely manifested and machinated in either more overt and/or covert forms. For truly, concepts such as “we the people” are, in and of themselves, subversive instruments which seek to deny and suppress the cold, hard fact of individual accountability.

 

The only thing that truly exists or is substantive is every individual’s choice to adhere to acts of harm or acts of help. And, a choice to embrace inaction and chronic indifference is also a choice of action. Thus, we can conclude, that intellectual refinement is absolutely essential for the continuing betterment of humanity, both individually and collectively. And while there will always be certain elements positioning themselves as the archenemy of such pursuits and intents, for those who choose the side of continued growth and learning: Be encouraged by the mire of anti-intellectualism in which you will find yourself. It means that you just may be...truly onto something.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

BETWEEN REASON & FAITH:

LET US COME BEFORE HIM NOW

 

 

Romans 1:20

“For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities-his eternal power and divine nature-have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that people are without excuse.”

 

Can a rational person truly embrace the Judeo-Christian faith? The consensus is that they cannot. The consensus is that intelligence is in inverse proportion to one’s belief in those things that one cannot prove beyond the shadow of a doubt. The reductionistic stereotype of the ‘Scientist’ and the ‘Logician’ assumes that one must be engaging in some kind of ‘magical thinking’ and fallacy if they profess to believe in God.

 

The realm known as ‘Apologetics’ seeks to bridge, as much as is possible, this gap between Reason & Faith. It seeks to synthesize the Exoteric with the Esoteric. And indeed, many rational people begin approaching any kind of spirituality or religiosity with extreme skepticism. And this is not altogether the wrong approach. After all, the Scriptures make an allowance for honest, rigorous testing of all things, and in fact, admonish God’s children to exercise reason and discernment in all of our daily dealings.

 

Moreover, a descent into a kind of existential ‘Hades’ is how every believer’s faith is strengthened, refined and authenticated. The Lord answers all who seek him, and He gives wisdom to those who earnestly seek it. Asking questions, and even strongly doubting in numinous phenomena does not display a lack of faith-on the contrary, it demonstrates it! Only those who lack the humility to investigate everything because they think they know it all, are in danger of condemnation.

 

In Romans 1:20, we are told that God can be clearly seen in all of His creation and that no man will have an excuse in the end. I personally find it irrational to reject even a Pascalian Wager concerning the existence of a sovereign, omniscient and omnipotent Deity. Even given what little we currently have been allowed by God’s good grace to discover in the realms of Science, etc. I see plenty of evidence of the existence of God. Yet I see it, not only in the affirmatives, but in the negatives-or the lack of knowledge that our epistemological cup still runneth over with.

 

It seems therefore, more rational to me, (or perhaps just ‘wise’) that we lack any other equitably sufficient explanation other than what God reveals through special revelation and through general revelation through both His Word and His creation, and therefore, should not be embarrassed at all, as rational, thinking adults, to embrace the Judeo-Christian faith.

 

Furthermore, many mock the Judeo-Christian believer because they erroneously assume that they are merely taking the ‘easy way out’. Or they believe that they are engaging in childish naivete beyond their years. But I can attest from hard won personal experience, that choosing to follow Jesus Christ is anything but the easiest path. It is, if undertaken following a genuine conversion, that is, an entering into an intense battle between one’s basest nature and the will of God. And running this gauntlet is unlike any other than one will ever encounter.

 

In Ephesians, we are reminded that we are not battling against flesh and flesh, but against dark principalities which flesh alone, cannot slay. Becoming a Christian is also more of a choice to submit one’s whole being into a relationship with the Lord over all of creation who holds the power of both life and death. That, is anything but an easy commitment! That is to say, choosing to believe in God is not undertaken by genuine believers in a cavalier manner, or with an intention of escapism. On the contrary, embracing God’s will and choosing His Truth, places accountability squarely upon our fragile mortal shoulders in a way that no other so-called ‘religion’ or philosophy can or does. If that is not an indication of its authenticity, I don’t know what is. After all: What person seeking to escape reality and to abdicate their own personal responsibilities, would choose this?! None.

 

Moreover, even the naturalistic evidence points more and more towards the authentic historicity of the Holy Bible. Even the ‘miracles’ recorded therein, actually have naturalistic explanations, even if every little detail has not yet been revealed to us. In truth, what we refer to as ‘miracles’ are merely a manifestation of those realities (but realities nevertheless) which we cannot fully grasp. The realms of human study often referred to as ‘theoretical’, are merely ‘theory’ for the time being. Some ‘theories’ will become ‘discoveries’, and others, will merely fall by the wayside according with the will of the One who knows all, and providently guides and directs all towards his intention that all should be given a chance to repent and to return unto Him before the end.

 

Yes, in the end, we will all find it both wise and perfectly logical to bow before Him. But let us instead, taking a leap of both Reason and Faith, choose to come before Him at present, and He will tell us all that we need to know. And in due time, everything will make perfect sense.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

INDIVIDUALISM AS COLLECTIVISM

 

 

It is often assumed by the more conformant members of any society, that the collective as placed before the individual, is of a higher moral order. And while traditionalism, in itself, does perhaps initially seek a higher moral imperative just as non-traditionalism does, the latter approach is, in the end, more holistic and sound. The issue with blind obeisance and conformity is that it fails to employ, as a kind of psycho-spiritual tool, the necessary resistance to the very system which it supports; a system that is inevitably ill-fated to transmogrify into its moral opposite in the face of human turpitude and lassitude.

 

Swiss philosopher and psychoanalyst Carl Jung once defined individuation as the end result of the strivings of the individual's own need to more authentically actualise itself in the face of oppressive collectivism. It is, in a sense, a psychic collection of 'scars', skills and revelations acquired in the struggle for self-mastery and fulfillment. Further, assuming that the 'individuated' and more 'actuated' self should naturally have more to contribute to society as a whole and not less, and in a much healthier and efficacious way, the latter approach of individuation over conformity more comprehensively addresses the moralistic gravitas and ethos of each individual's higher calling and needs as well as those of the society they dwell in.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

TOWARDS A SOUND THEONOMY

 

 

“He who obeys God needs no other authority.”-Petr Chelčický

 

A true anarchist is, in truth, fiercely righteous. Further, true anarchy seeks not freedom from ALL moralistic governance, rather freedom from the unjust oppression and afflictions of petty tyranny and a false and subverted moralism, either from within or without. And, contrary to common understanding, the orthopraxis of anarchy seeks to place full accountability upon the shoulders of the individual, rather than the State or any other external agency.

 

Anarchy in its purest form applies the sound wisdom of self-governance tempered with and guided by the individual's keenest conscience concerning Good & Evil, and help vs. harm. A true anarchist practices not lawlessness, but rigorous moral and intellectual discipline . A true anarchist seeks to be the author not of chaos and confusion, but of symmetry and synthesis. For the purpose of endowing man with a radicalized freedom is not to empower his lowest and basest impulses, rather, to free him FROM such shackles so that he may more authentically develop his higher self and aspirations.

 

Moreover, a true anarchist also knows that he cannot achieve a lasting bond between his primeval self and his spiritual self without a full prostration before the ministrations and daily instructions of His Creator God. For His God is a God of perfect and ultimate Law & Order. And insofar as he leans upon the sovereign authority of the Almighty God and the Holy Spirit, is he freed from the unholy contracts of a 'freedom', both facile and ultimately, eternally and insufferably binding. For where the Spirit of the Lord is, there, there! my good anarchist, awaits your true FREEDOM!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

HELL-BENT ON HEAVEN

 

 

If you have not gone through Hell to find Christ, and to reach Heaven, then your Faith is most likely false. So many of the so-called 'brethren' have deceived themselves that their brand of religiosity is 'superior' to that of those who have gone down a more labyrinthine, yet authentic path towards Truth. But true faith, if it is to be both dynamic & effective, must be borne from the depths of Despair & Faithlessness. Each individual disciple must separate from the 'masses' in order to become malleable to God's will & God's will alone. Sanctification is surrender-in-action. When left to our own fallible & reprobate intellects, we merely digress. When left to our own perception & 'opinion', we get lost in the world. 'Reality' and the perception thereof may indeed be 'relative', but Truth is absolute! That is its very essence. And Truth requires nothing less than a complete prostration before the shrine of human vulnerability & reverence before the One Who authors & guides its ministrations. Therefore, dear Truth seekers, never judge yourself or others by the seeming aimlessness or curvilinearity of the peripatetic's path, but by the endurance & persistence & sincerity of its sojourner.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

THE EDENIC SCENE: AN EGEGETICAL SUMMATION

 

 

The tree of knowledge of good & evil is not merely symbolic of the inherent tendency of we human beings to stray from the will of God, but is also an allegorical representation of the “fall” from innocence & ignorance of both the good & evil within ourselves & within the world at large into the full prescience of these phenomena & of our inherent human weakness in the face of them. The “forbidden fruit” thus also symbolizes the epistemological and ontological limits God has placed upon humankind (us).

 

In essence, God is saying to us: “Surrender yourselves to my Sovereignty & Superiority alone or perish. Only I know all & can safely & effectively guide you through this mortal human life. You must therefore pay the consequences or “sin wages” for attempting to know what I know, as this is simply beyond that which you are able to handle, & I am your heavenly Father, & your eternal protector.” (Psalm 2:11-12 “Serve the Lord with fear & trembling lest he be angry with you & you be destroyed in your own way...”)

 

Thus, God is not some “Petty-Tyrant-In-The-Sky-God-Nazi-On-A-PowerTrip” or metaphysical fascist merely making rules which he knows full well human beings cannot & will not follow just so he can derive sadistic pleasure from torturing us or “punishing” us. That would be creating God in our image, as we can all attest to human beings behaving in this way from time to time. Rather, it is a matter of Him guiding us in the most fruitful & safest direction & teaching us the way to go so that, through our hard-learned surrender to Him & submission to His will, we can reap the fruits of true & everlasting Joy & Fulfillment. (Ezekiel 33:11 “As surely as I live,” declares the Sovereign Lord, “I take no pleasure in the death of the wicked, but rather that they turn from their ways & live...”) (Romans 2:11 “For God does not show favourtism.”) For God does not wish to harm us, but to prosper us & to preserve us. (Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you; plans to prosper you & not to harm you.”)

 

Furthermore, although it remains to be self-evident that we are self-evidently limited in that which we can know & could benefit from knowing, there are, of course, provisions made for humankind to have some limited access to God's knowledge & His wisdom. For He must afford us some advancement in that we might be best equipped & honoured with the task of fulfilling His plans for the good of all & everything. (Psalm 18:30 “As for God, His way is perfect; the Word of the Lord is flawless. He is a shield for all who take refuge in him.”) Yet ultimately, the eating of that forbidden fruit in the Garden of Eden in & of itself is not the problem. Rather, the root of all human ills & depravity lies at the heart of how we fail to recognize “why” we have been granted that which God has granted us & how we “sin” (“hamartia” (Greek): to fall short of the mark) & fail to properly employ it.

 

And this is where that demarcation between “knowledge” & “wisdom” is most sharply drawn. For as God's Word tells us, all are privy to the wisdom of God who are willing to submit to God's will for its subsequent employment & engagement in & with the outside world. All in all, a loss of innocence (a gaining of knowledge) or “the fall” of humankind is not merely an intractable aspect of the human experience & condition itself, but is, in fact, a necessity as it pertains to the gradual spiritual refinement & salvation of each individual. For the loss of innocence, or the gaining of worldly awareness & indeed, even world savvy is necessary to cultivate to a certain degree within the psyche of each individual in that we may live most wisely & honestly. It is also significant to build up within ourselves so that we may successfully navigate the world towards the ends of our own self-preservation as it pertains to the higher good (or righteousness) & God's will.

 

Ultimately, becoming equally aware of or “mature of mind” to both “good & evil” is a prerequisite in order that we may defeat those evil forces which seek to deceive & blind us to their methods & means. Yet, we must also keep in mind, that evil can only truly be defeated with good in the end. (1 Peter 5:8 “Be self-controlled & alert. Your enemy the devil prowls about like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that your brothers in Christ throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings.”) (Romans 12:21 “Do not be overcome by evil; rather, overcome evil with good.”)

 

Hence, although we must wisely heed the call to grant the realization & vigilance of both good and evil equal deference & equanimity, the only true way to defeat the devil is to take ownership & inventory of the darkness which always resides deep within our own human recesses of desire & potentiality. (Romans 3:23 “For all have sinned & fall short the glory of God.”) Indeed, we all must, in our own way, and much like that of Christ Himself, descend to each our own Hades, if we are to not only know the enemy which we battle against daily, but if we are to have ultimate victory through Christ's power over him. Integration thus, is always key concerning both our virtue & our vice, as both light & darkness depend upon one another for their fullest actualization.

 

In finale, we must also remember, that integration of our “shadow” or our “dark side” does not necessarily have to entail a full embrace or a complete engulfment by or immersion into its goading & callings. For wholeness, if we are seeking it in the righteous place through the Holy God & His Spirit & will themselves, is intrinsically synonymous with goodness & with eternal moral victory & salvation, not that further dehumanization, demoralization & fragmentation which this current world, ruled as it is by evil, can offer.

 

Therefore in closing, we must: (Ephesians 6:10-18 “Finally, be strong in the Lord & in His mighty power. Put on the full armour of God so that you can take your stand against the devil & his schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh & blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world & against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armour of God, so that when the day of evil comes you may be able to stand your ground & after you have done everything to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, & with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all of this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation & the sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God. And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers & requests. With this in mind, be alert & always keep on praying for all the saints.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A MOMENTARY LIGHT AFFLICTION

 

 

"We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed, perplexed but not despairing, persecuted but not forsaken, struck down but not destroyed. Therefore we do not lose heart, but though our outer man is decaying, yet our inner man is being renewed day by day. For momentary light affliction is producing for us, an eternal light of glory far beyond all comparison." (2 Corinthians 4:16- 17)

 

“Now all has been heard; here is the conclusion of the matter: Fear God and keep His commandments, for this is the whole duty of man.” (Ecclesiastes 12:13)

 

“...being confident of this one thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ.” (Philippians 1:6)

 

 

The search and fulfillment of naturalistic human longing & desire often leads to the unleashing of some kind of evil or deleterious effect. Therefore, the question is: Should one keep oneself safely confined within the barbed-wire bounds of worldly abnegation or puritanical asceticism and thus quite bound within moralistic “freedom” from the flesh, or unleash oneself in sublimative actuality, thus risking both infernal & eternal engulfment? Indeed, sometimes it often seems that the whole task of this human experience & existence is in learning how to surrender, how to let go & submit ourselves to the will of The Lord. For more & more, & contrary to common wisdom, the older we get the more vulnerable we become-not the less. And here is where the message of 2 Corinthians 12:7-10 comes keenly into focus: That His power is made perfect through our weakness.

 

Truly, we must all continue to relearn that fine, higher art of finding strength only in utter vulnerability before God, man & those "spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms (Ephesians 6:12)". I think one of the main obstacles we continually put before ourselves is in how we have been conditioned by the phenomenon of socialization (the wounds that others have left us with) to fear that submission to the orthopraxis of humility will only lead to humiliation. And all things considered, some other people will exploit us in this way, but most people will not, if anything, because they are beholden to the same vulnerabilities & fears that we are. As someone once observed, “Fear keeps us sane.”

 

Furthermore, we all, as God's progeny, fear the loss of our eternal souls through that uniquely human quest to quell the flames of the flesh & its never-ending yearning for unbridled sensual indulgence. Yet the Holy Writ again consoles us with the reminder that he or she who wishes to be released from most mortal vagaries must first, and quite paradoxically, submit first to self-abnegation (at least, to be sure, as it concerns one's originally "sinful" nature). However, this is also not to be confused with the escapist sentiments of Eastern mysticism, as they believe there is no “self” to abnegate believing in no such thing in an individualistic way.

 

And yet, that soundness of mind granted to us through the Holy Spirit clarifies this issue by revealing to us how we must first agree to the relative enslavements of moral prudence if we can receive the rather misnamed “unconditional” gifts of both adequate comfort & prosperity here on Earth & absolution & reward to come in heaven. For ultimately, the Scripture very explicitly calls us to submission to the will of the Lord most pressingly, if we are to breach the transcendence of Eternality which will be granted to those who belong to him. (1 John 3:4-6 "But you know that he appeared that he might take away our sins. And in him is no sin. No one who lives in him keeps on sinning. No one who continues to sin has either seen him or known him.")

 

Moreover, keeping a disciplined & vigilant mind's eye on Eternity as we wrestle with Temporality is again, perhaps the highest, noblest & most sweepingly epic quest of humankind. And, for adequate hermeneutic synthesis, God offers these words (and all others throughout Scripture taken in holistic context): “We are afflicted in every way but not crushed, perplexed but not despairing, persecuted but not forsaken, struck down but not destroyed. Therefore we do not lose heart, but though our outer man is decaying, yet our inner man is being renewed day by day. For momentary light affliction is producing for us, an eternal light of Glory far beyond all comparison So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal..” (2 Corinthians 4:16-18)

 

Although it is true that the more a human being becomes what Carl Jung termed "psycho-spiritually" edified or evolved, the more they will, by virtue, become more endangered in a worldly sense. However, this is all a test (and perhaps the ultimate test) of our faith & fortitude. And, from a strictly Darwinian perspective, of course, many of this line of thinking mistakenly believe that as an organism complexifies & develops itself, the more of an advantage it has, or the less vulnerable it becomes. However, the human experience itself testifies to the fallacy of such thinking.

 

In continuum, as noted above, we do seem to grow increasingly more vulnerable as we age & increase in both fleshly infirmity & in our worldly and spiritual knowledge & wisdom. This is perhaps exactly what lends the choice of truth over inscience and growth over stagnation, their concomitant virtue & spiritual merit. As one rabbi put it: “A truly devout man cannot be ignorant.” And, as the Holy Writ declares it thus: “But now he has reconciled you by Christ's physical death to present you holy in his sight, without blemish and free from accusation-if you continue in your faith established & firm, not moved from the hope held out in the Gospel.” (Colossians 2:22) Yet, we must also take heed of the Scripture which warns us of the accumulation of too much secular knowledge at the expense of higher truth & wisdom: “Be warned, my son, of anything in addition to them (the Word of God). Of making many books there is no end, and much study wearies the body. (Ecclesiastes 12:12)

 

Thus, in all things, he merely guides us towards moderation & a healthy, fruitful balance when we submit ourselves to His will & Law. Ah, again it reigns true that there is an ill for every scripture & a scripture for every ill. How sweet & satiating is the bread of the Word of God evermore. It goes down to the inmost parts, rooting out every toxic tare. (John 6:51 "I am the living bread that came down from heaven. If anyone eats of this bread he will live forever.") Nevertheless, when the battle scars of the human soul's earthly pilgrimage are felt upon the phantom limbs of memory, clarity can so easily become obfuscated. Sometimes we begin to doubt where we are in our Journey, & if we are on the right path. Some days are better than others, as the adage goes. It’s part & parcel of the human condition and our inherent limitations.

 

On darker days like these, we may be tempted to draw that black, velveteen cloak of Apathy, Nihilism & Inertia back up 'round us again, letting it all fall away. And yet, the paradox is, that it is in these very moments of letting it all go, that we find inner sanctity, wholeness & balance once again. We can find peace & consolation through every word that comes from the mouth of God, & through every promise we can have faith will return unto us, a recompense for our earthly spiritual victories & casualties. (“...man does not live on bread alone but on every word that comes from the mouth of the Lord.” Deuteronomy 8:3) Because it is only when we are weary beyond that of our own will & power, that The Lord God is made perfect in His strength within us.

 

In essence, we must let go, to hold on in this life. And oftentimes, it seems a slight embarrassment that the basic human rights we should just be able to take for granted, are denied us, & no less, by our very own selves. Even I used to believe in self-improvement. Now, I believe in self-acceptance-but even better yet, I believe in submission to the will of He alone who saves. (Matthew 7:21 "Not everyone who says to me, 'Lord, Lord', will enter into the kingdom of heaven, but only he who does the will of my Father who is in heaven.") The Greek theological term for this process of emptying the self, often used in relation to the attributes of Christ Himself is “kenosis.” For again, paradoxically, we must lose our lives to save them. We must lose our “self” to redeem them. (John 12:25- 26 "The man who loves his life will lose it, while the man who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life. Whoever serves me must follow me; & where I am my servant will be also. My Father will honour the one who serves me.")

 

Popular psychology tells us, in so many words & in so many of its ways that we must “bolster our self-esteem” & “assert our basic human right to happiness & fulfillment.” But where these secularist philosophies fall short is that they place far too much power & competence in the hands of human beings who can never live up to these things-at least, not for long. Don't get me wrong, yes, we do have a right to be whole, & to be loved, but only as far as we surrender ourselves to the only source that can adequately offer this to us: The Grace of our Heavenly Father & atonement through His Son Jesus Christ. For we must always bear in mind that we will reap only what we sow.

 

If someone were to ask me why I believed that Judeo-Christianity was the one & only true religion & adequate philosophy to devote my discipleship to, I would merely say: “Quite frankly, because it is the only religion that holds each & every one of us fully morally accountable for our life choices & lifestyles.” In other words, I am a disciple of Judeo-Christianity precisely because it is the least reasonable road to take (at least inasmuch as we each now dwell in a "buy-now-pay-later" actuality). I suppose a proper play on words would be that such a belief is augmented by a kind of theological "credo quia absurdum", if you will. And of course, the reasons for my believing what I believe by no means stop at this.

 

More plainly spoken, I know I am on the right path when I am in adherence to Judeo-Christian principles, every word of the Lord God proves its absolute inerrancy time & again. We have all felt that mysteriously compelling yet serenely superconductive life force when The Holy Spirit is once more ennobled within us once again, & we suddenly feel the full weight of Jesus' words, bearing that lighter yoke as it relates to our human condition & mortality. It is undeniably a feeling unlike any other (& with no egregious bodily harm & after-effects, I might add). Furthermore, one thing we all come to learn (if we are showing up for class) is how we simply cannot, while on this earth & in this stricken & infirm human condition, cease being wounded. We indeed, must take up the cross of each our own sufferings & afflictions. (Matthew 16:34 "If anyone would come after me, he must take up his own cross & follow me.")

 

Thus must we learn very quickly, no matter how difficult it might be, that highest art of all arts: How to remain malleable in the face of the call of raw survivalist mentalities, which goad us on to harden ourselves, & to become intractable. In other words, we must stay open to our humanity & especially, our vulnerability, if we are to reap the benefits of this life's fullest & truest purpose as it relates to the life to come. This is why, after all, Satan has set up the world to humiliate & persecute any & all displays of true emotional honesty & transparency. It is because he knows that the conduits of the heart & the Spirit are the only ways we human beings of God's splendid design can fruitfully experience the metaphysical.

 

This, too, I have learned thus far upon my journey towards he who dwells in that unapproachable Light spoken of in the Scripture: (1 Timothy 6:16: “...(Christ) who alone is immortal & lives in unapproachable light whom no one has seen nor can see.”): We cannot harden our hearts. We must stay in touch with feelings. Of course, feelings balanced by that moral reason & soundness which can be found only through dwelling in the absolute truth of God in each our daily wanderings. And the Evil One knows how difficult it is for us to do this, as he knows we also possess a keenly disturbing sentience of the method of demonic entities also afflicting us through our human emotionality. It is one of the most harrowing & often ravaging things we must vow to ourselves, but it is well worth it, once yet another battle has been won through Christ from within ourselves over the forces of this dark world.

 

Yet we also must remember that, as the old common colloquialism goes: It ain't over 'til it's over! We will suffer until the end of our mortal days. This is the burden we all must bear willingly & fully if we are to bear that fruit which brings complete nourishment & resurrection unto God's Kingdom. “For you were once in darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light (for the fruit of the Light consists in all goodness, righteousness & Truth) and find out what pleases the Lord. Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them.” (Ephesians 5:8-11). We all grow faint & weary, but as long as we look inward in complete humility & honesty at ourselves through the eyes of our Lord, asking Him through prayer & supplication to root out any possible evil in us, we will, in due time (in His time), mount up with wings as eagles.

 

So, the next time we torment ourselves in doubt: Have I even made any progress? Or am I just deluded, seeing only what I want to see? When will this end? The Lord will always answer us, when we are ready to receive him: “...being confident in this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Jesus Christ.” (Philippians 1:6) No human on the face of this planet has no obstacles to overcome within themselves, despite the facade of those whom we often perceive are not in tune with the truth & the light within themselves & yet deceptively act as if they are. But again, the Scripture also consoles us in any possible way we may need, not to envy those who triumph in their evil, for their ways will someday perish. (Psalm 37: 1-2) We must first humble ourselves before the shabby shrine of our human inadequacy & susceptibility if we are to someday be able to approach Him in His Holy dwelling.

 

Indeed, time & time again, He brings many prodigal sons & daughters home after many dark travails (even if most are taken along the road of one's own neurogeography) to realize that we can possess full power in & through Him only when we have surrendered to our own powerlessness. And we must be prepared, for many demons will indeed, rise up to slay us once we have fully committed again to our spiritual ripening & quickening in Christ. Yet we must “...continue to work out your (our) salvation in fear & trembling, for it is God who works in you (us) according to his good purpose.” (Philippians 2: 12-13)

 

All in all, perhaps one of the main purposes for our individual and collective human experience is to learn how to fall, surrendering ourselves only to all of the right things & for the right reasons. For even if our humanly (& yet beautifully) scarred psyches cannot see the fullness of His glory when we cannot access a feeling of worthiness or clarity within ourselves, nothing can separate us from the love of our Lord Jesus Christ. He is not dependent upon our perfection in order to bring His perfection into manifestation. After all, He tells us to be still & know that He is God. In finale, we all have been, according to The Lord God's perfect justice & design, equally blessed and equally cursed in each our own ways. Yet we still have a condition placed upon us in that we may receive salvation on the day of Christ's return. We are called to submit our will, despite the ways we might resist Him, in sincerity, humility & reverence towards the gradual actualization of the gifts & abilities He has granted to us.

 

Yet, & we all forget this too easily: We must do it in His name & according to only His Word & good plan. If it is said, at least according to secular (and, ultimately misleading) wisdom, that we cannot escape from the world, but must escape into it, let us acknowledge, with due diligence, our earthly & socio-political realities & responsibilities while carrying out the due diligence towards our spiritual stewardship. Only then can we fulfill the Holy adage to be in the world, but not of it. We will continue to “fall short of the mark” (Greek “hamartia”: sin, to fall short of the mark), yet Christ fulfilled our atonement when he made that epic descension to Hades as a condition of His divination.

 

Therefore, it is not perhaps so much that we, too, must descend to Hades so that we can someday become divine, but that we can work most gainfully towards our salvation only when we fully take up the yoke of submitting ourselves to the actualization of His will and His will alone. And although we also must keep in mind that what we feel we are missing out on in the way of earthly gratification & sensual indulgence, the Lord will some exultant day, more than compensate with the full reward of His promise of heavenly inheritance. “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord; plans to prosper you & not harm you, plans to give you hope & a future.” (Jeremiah 29:11) “No eye has seen, nor ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love Him.” (1 Corinthians 2:9)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

MINDING THE HEART

 

 

"Follow your heart but take your brain with you."

-Alfred Adler

 

 

Bringing pain to others is inevitable. It is as inevitable as that of our own immanent mortality. For no matter whatever side we think ourselves to be on, that of God and doing good or that of the Devil and doing evil, can we ever avoid harming none? What is the way one should conduct oneself in Life? Should we let our passions and whims reign or Reason and so-called righteousness? But truly, some will inevitably get scathed in the process of that of each our own self-actualization & search for fulfillment. I think justice to be a subjective matter just as much as an objective, strictly abstract, legalistic matter and concept.

 

This is why perhaps we cannot live a life mapped perfectly out as to how to live or not live. Perhaps the true semblance of order and beauty breached is when we are just being, just living by that which we most naturally & authentically, are. Perhaps this is the only true virtue, paradoxically so, arises out of those moments when we are focused upon doing what we need to be & do first for ourselves & the cause of our own inward sustenance & balance. For true Altruism cannot be conceived, let alone born from the barren womb of Self-Neglect.

 

Furthermore, the most violent & insidious variations of Savagery, in actuality, often resides within Civility, or rather, within the heart of the socially engineered Beast. It is also a force external which enters into our minds, confounding us to our truest state of inherent Grace & Wholeness. And it comes from what I believe, as a follower of Judeo-Christianity, those “principalities unseen” (subatomic, "quantum" forces). For the human entity only wishes to harm itself &/or others when its most authentic self is stifled & so battered by the “outside” world, making us thus vulnerable to that fear, doubt and self-loathing which eventually becomes both imposed upon & exploited by others.

 

Thus perhaps as it so often turns out to be, the answer to how we should be or live our lives in a manner most conducive to the stoic causes of self-preservation, self-actualization & collective social interest is contrary to what the unbearded bards of Positivism so often tell us. In finale, perhaps authenticity of being is that one Virtue unmerited, & when left unheeded, is that one secret of the truest saints of this Earth. Perhaps self-acceptance in all of one's glory & infamy, is the one & only Master Key to those gates of Heaven residing both above & here below. For religiosity may indeed be dogmatically unsound, but a deep & abiding Spirituality knows that God & all things transcendent reside only beneath the seeming Chaos & exquisitely bewildering complexity of God's Creation.

 

We would do well to let our hearts be our mind and reserve for that reasoning organ, the Intellect, the task of minding the heart only when it has forgotten its true purpose, only when it has forgotten the logistics of its own inherent existential geography. For the answers are always there within us as they were breathed into us by our Sovereign Creator Himself. In the beginning, God created it all and saw that it was good. He still thinks so, but has left it up to us what we will choose to do with what He has granted us. Accountability rests squarely within each our own individual laps. What will we choose in this moment: good or evil? Eternity weighs itself without ceasing, upon this pole. For we all know that there is, indeed such a thing as absolute truth, & absolute "right or wrong" despite how we may have been misinformed.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

LIGHTNING IN A BOTTLE

 

 

Oftentimes one of the greatest paradoxes of the human condition & experience lies in how the self-preservation instinct must often sublimate itself via the conduit of self-destructive and/or negating means of methodology. To clarify, it is often that which we must do, or that which we must be in order to survive which acts in direct opposition to that of our own thrivance, or self-actualization. Furthermore, this human dilemma and, indeed, often multilemma, is what German existentialist Martin Heidegger called our “existentialia”, which includes all of those exigencies which our lives place upon us both externally and internally. The external, of course, having to do with the fulfillment of our practical and physical needs-the most basic means & ends of self-preservation. Those internal agencies of the human “existentialia” of course, concern that which has to do with the so-called "intangibles" of self-actualization or, with those psychological methods which each human individual must often employ in defense of one’s personal integrity and dignity.

 

Moreover, such metaphysical matters concern that most epic human quest to live one’s life as authentically as one can in accordance to one’s individual moral and/or ethical code. In fact, many believe this brand of self-interest as a prerequisite to all other pleasantries & successes of communal existence. For each individual, the answer to the questions of this human condition & experience will, of course, vary. Some take a more extroverted, sensate approach towards seeking the answers to each their own existence. Others work more from the inside-out. In a word, some are better-suited for a more introspective approach. Those of this persuasion seek the answers through the mediums of reflection and contemplation. In essence, their interaction with life is on a more intuitive and intellectual level, whereas for the former mentioned persons, they have more faith in the pragmatic consistencies of material & experiential engagement with the world outside of themselves in bringing their fates to fruition.

 

However, of course, both methods are sound, as long as their intent & goal remain moral/ethically prescribed & circumscribed, and as long as each individual learns to accommodate enough of those methods & approaches not in line with their most natural & preferred way of being, so that we all, no matter our particular brand of individualistic "typology", might continue to grow & develop into more well-rounded persons. Although unfortunately, since the world recognizes & rewards action more than deep thought, people of the latter, more "extroverted" persuasion are usually afforded more of a sense of communality than those of their counterparts. However, most "introverts" are usually quite self-sufficient enough, they will especially be quick to point out, to compensate for any savoir faire & socio-political drive or appeal which they may lack.

 

In finale, living amongst other individuals who are just as complicated & solipsistic as we, ourselves feel ourselves to be, is oftentimes felt by persons of all typologies to be a Sisyphean task to achieve and thus, also often a futile attempt at compromise. However, we depend upon other human beings in large part, for our very sense of purpose. One cannot find fulfillment living within a vacuum. Or as the old maxim reveals: “Nature abhors a vacuum.” Thus, can we already see the complexity of human existence itself, let alone that of seizing control over the means by which one resolves each their own private and very personal “ultimates,” while also grappling with task of one's own “survival,” both physically & psycho-spiritually. It is difficult enough to quiet the turmoil of the human soul enough to be able to “get by” each and every day, let alone to synthesize the crude limitations placed upon our potentiation.

 

But feeling as if our spirit is too large for the small-minded world in which we live is, of course, a universal & intractable aspect of our human experience. But, if indeed perception becomes what we perceive to be & thus allow through our behaviour to become even further rooted in "actuality", then the best we can do is in the systematic refinement of our Spirits & Intellects, or the careful, diligent cultivation of our inmost selves into that which we wish to bring to fruition externally in the world. As within, so without comes to manifest itself thus, time & again.

 

For if any true worth or nobility is to be breached by any one human individual, it must spring forth first, from within. I suppose it is best described as a practice of inward cultivation before outward realization. And, contrary to the world which mainly exalts mindless pragmatism while belittling & scoffing at a more circumspect, methodical approach, the latter methodology is often discovered to be much more profound and efficacious regarding the individual's quest of self-actualization & fulfillment, especially in relation to "the collective".

 

In the end, both means and ends must of course be duly weighed when they involve the ultimates of this human existence. Nevertheless, all quandaries & margins for human error aside, each & every individual must grapple with keeping drawn, a very distinct boundary line between what one does in order to "survive" vs. what one must also do to live by the dictates of their inmost cherished & authentic soul’s desires, values and dreams, as we all face a continual struggle of reconciliation between the paradoxes of this life. Yet although our need to survive will often violently collide with that of our need to thrive, the reasoning of both Heart & Head are best granted equal deference. For ultimately, if we fail to dream, if we fail to love, if we forget how to laugh, to cry, but most of all, how to most deeply, humanly & honestly live, it is then that we will have truly ceased, to both survive & thrive.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

MATRIX: A UNITARY TRANFORMATION

 

 

Love floods the desiccate crevices of the atrophic Heart, and the Soul is once more saturated with the superencumbrant, almost unbearable weight of True Freedom and Life once more. And how we always feel so foolish when we realize just how much we’ve missed fearing and shutting it out. But we can also now see just how much it has missed & needed us, for this is a raison d’etre intractably interdependent. And it’s almost as if, all the times we were without Love never really existed at all, but were perhaps spurious projections to keep us preoccupied until we returned back to our true Home. And what faithfully prodigal Sons & Daughters we all are, indeed.

 

Yet perhaps any world outside of the Matrix of Love is never our true dwelling place at all, although these other worlds are ever-present, nevertheless. But this “two worlds apart” dialectic persists only when we resist them, or attempt to fully inhabit both. For the human entity cannot serve two antithetical masters and neither can the body, spirit or the mind. And hence the age old philosophical inquiry of what is “real,” the objective consensual phenomena of a world of sharply demarcated Logic and linearity, or that world perceived through the sentient organs of Intuition & Subjectivity? For we are told that both exist, but that only one is relevant. And furthermore, it seems to me that the state in which we most deeply connect with Love is anything but linear, disaffective and impersonal. Yet there are no current provisions made for Metaphysically-employed scientists and Love hurts just as much if not perhaps more than any physical malady or affliction- even as it soothes and satiates.

 

Furthermore, per Eastern thought, perhaps our universe cannot exist without the presence of human consciousness itself. But, to play upon the philosophical cliche, if no-one was in a forest where a tree fell, wouldn’t someone still see it, smell it, taste it, feel it, hear it even but if within their Mind's Eye? For even one consciousness alone, even removed from the premise of classical empiricist observation is capable of a wondrous infinitude of imagination and dynamism with which to construct any world of its choosing. And this is perhaps the Ultimate act of Love, Creation. The acknowledgment of and regard for ‘Being-ness,’ the pure desire to be alive and sensing and sharing of one’s gifts with our fellow human kindred. The process being, in & of itself, the product. Or rather, I like to think of the valuation of the very act of being & cogitating lying not so much within the "answers" one is seeking, but within the edification process of Inquiry itself. Indeed, being authentically & fully who one is, actively & responsibly engaged with the world itself is, in some sense perhaps the ultimate act of Love, as well as a variation of "ordinary heroism".

 

Of course all philosophers have pondered upon the concept of the superior virtue and nobility to be found in & gleaned from Chaos and an oppositional striving against that which is comfortably conformant & quotidian-as in the classically epic, Rousseau-esque imago of the “noble savage.” For an escapist philosophy can be very seductive indeed, insofar as it absolves people of any authentic engagement with life & relieves one conveniently of any real accountability for one's actions or even one's sins of omission, if this be the case. I suppose this can be referred to as a kind of "spiritual entropy", a force which human individuals are constantly in tug-of-war with. Yet many physicists specify that what we generally regard as “chaos” as order, just order of an "infinite complexity". In other words, human consciousness is still too myopic in its vision & limited in its scope to be able to fully see things as they truly are beneath the macroscopic perspective we are socially engineered to place our faith in.

 

In finale, I think that we are all continually learning that the purpose of the existence of paradox and seeming disunity perceived to be at work throughout the universe is not necessarily aimed to merely bewilder or to inflict petty torment, but to teach & hone the Soul towards its fullest possible spiritual evolution & actualization. In other words, strife is best viewed upon as an evolutionary tool of "psycho-spiritual" means, to borrow a phrase coined by Carl Gustav Jung. And it is also perfectly fine to simplify things for ourselves when need be as well. Perhaps it all exists merely for the sake of existing. Perhaps it just is because it is the way that it was created to be. And perhaps this Heraclitean-and also Taoist wisdom, in and of itself, contains the key to all heavenly portals. All is perfect exactly as it is.

 

And perhaps all that Evil is, is that which manifests as an interference with the natural design and course of all things. For even Life and Death cavort in celebration and diplomacy beyond what we can often fully grasp with our myopic Mind's Eye. In the end, the only danger perhaps, does lie only within each and every individual’s heart, mind and attendant will. And hopefully, someday, we will each come to accept this verity with finality. Until then we must contend with the classically bifurcate mind & heart as we learn to more efficaciously navigate the labyrinthine, hazardous laboratory of a kind of existential quantum mechanics, which also follows its own uncertainty principle, while keeping lucidly within our Soul’s Mind’s Eye both a prescience and a sentience towards the highest and noblest objectives of our fullest potential as a Humanity.

 

And, if we manage this experiment with sufficient reverence and competence, will perhaps we come to the place where, at last, there will be no more “collapses of any wave functions” to tediously measure & anticipate, no more photons or other assorted matter/matters to let “propagate in isolation-“ or rather, isolate in vacuous propagation, no more Schrödinger’s cats to diligently care for, no more quantum hypotheses to perplex and dizzy ourselves with, no more “constants” to establish. Yes, perhaps someday we will learn how to just live and love within the universe we’ve already got-within the wondrous world we already know and have been gifted with. But most of all, perhaps will we finally someday come to see that all of our burning & toiling questions were always and already, fully answered.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

AURIBUS TENERE LUPUM

 

Sometimes the darkness is there to lead us to the light. The darkness always finds the light, no matter how reluctantly, deriving its very being from it. Yet still, the outside often seeps in too keenly, no matter how hermetically sealed the Soul-no matter how hermeneutically well-schooled the Intellect. And thus are the strivings of the Spirit time & again stupefied by the arcane syllabus of Rationalist Empiricism. For these metaphysical ministrations are subservient only to the laws of Immaterialism, as they strive towards that canonical consummation wrought by those statutes scriven by the right-handed magistrate of the Triune God.

 

For only when we pray in the name of all three, the Father, the Son & the Holy Spirit, can we then be miraculously released from the afflictions of Temporality, unto the exultation & expansion of Eternality foreseen within the here & now. Thus we indeed, must seize a wolf by its ears if we are to spare the Soul the infestations of its rabid claw & fang. For Eternity is often weighed in most measurably upon the wings of a singular moment, finding its most poignant expression in the wake of all Ecclesiastical realization & ecumenical synthesis.

 

Yet we are never so alone as when we are stricken deaf, dumb & mute in our most common coherence. And we are often never so rejuvenated as when tended by the metaphysicians of Disease & Despair. Yes, sometimes the ever immanent sense of one's own nihility, in a world of such negligence & broken dreams is the one thing, in the end, which spurs a Soul ever onward towards Epektasis, that striving of every human soul towards its truest & fullest actualization, wholeness & perfection.

 

How then can an entity as enriched & eternal as a Soul feel thus so vacuous, so futile, so chronically impoverished, & intractably ephemeral & finite? Perhaps this feeling, is what we have come to call “Time”, whether it is being experienced as Kronos or Kyros. For most things seem to equate more to an intangible & fleeting movement of experience, both external & internal, rather than to the casuistry so often ascribed, ad nauseum, to only those objects & subjects which we tend to classify as being “had” or “held”. Perhaps all which truly exists is best classified within the taxonomy of abstract thought alone as many philosophers have pondered. Perhaps all we are-perhaps all that is, is truly an infinite & glorious manifestation of intellectualis Dei, dreaming in endless & splendid perpetuity? For what is declared & sanctified as “real” by the all-too-cleanly-shaven bards of Positivism, in all of its subversively cynical negativism, housed as it is within the atrophic viscerae & leprotic skin of the Body Politic, is ultimately what begs all of these questions concerning the “immaterial”.

 

So then, perhaps we have known all along, that there are no such things as Nihility or Despair. There is no Rosetta Stone that will not bleed forth with an ever-flowing spring of Lux et Veritas et Vitae Aeturnum, so long as it is struck squarest upon its most fracturable fissures. For oftentimes, in never allowing life to dissect us, is to risk never being assembled rightly by the hand of our Creator Divine. For what so often desires unity must first allow disunity to assert its form so that the Master Sculptor may bring to completion the Soul's realization, most immanent and eminent, of the truest self it seeks to substantiate, of the personage God Himself envisages within the psychomantium of such hallowed projections alone.

 

Thus we, with Primal Intuition must declare ourselves definitively sane in the face of all of the salacious intensity & licentious delirium which this mortal human flesh may visit upon us. For only then, can we thereby discharging our wanton shadow from the ghost asylum of that puritanical tyranny so unnaturally cultivated as it is, by the pretenses & posturings of the Body Politic. For we are all too achingly aware of the true apostasy we must commit daily before the ecumenical altars of so-called Social Order & Industry. Yet, not unlike the true nature we must often shun, nothing is ever just either-or, but is always all-of-the-above and at-the-same-time. It is that infinite Quantum Void, ever teeming with mere probability or possibility, until we choose, thereby externalizing the internal.

 

Yet until this fateful moment, all remains in mere ontological suspension. And one individual's Civility & Order is another's utter Savagery & Chaos. Moreover, the "depraved anarchy" and portentous "damnation" often so sanctimoniously prognosticated by some of a more provincial-minded leaning, is, in actuality, usually experienced by others as their only Raison d'être & Redemption. It is often assumed that resistance to that which is most natural in human nature is rewarding in its preventive or safeguarding effects, but, we also must determine, for each individual context, what harm such resistance could also do to the human entity overall. For, some argue, that all was created to possess a particular intrinsic perfection of design & nature. And they also argue that, perhaps Essence should always be honoured as preceding Existence, even, & perhaps especially in the face of those dictates of ontological revision so militantly urged & enforced by the Political Architects & Social Engineers of any given milieu. Yet I suppose, many will continue to pay heed only to the stifling dogmas of Doctrine & Denomination.

 

Yet what we all often fail to realize is how this blind adherence to sacrosanct orthodoxy merely seeks to exact from Humanity, a diffusion of Ipseity, and therefore can prevent any ultimate ethical or moral soundness or efficacy to be achieved amongst any given society or within any given individual. For truly, all communal or civic duty begins within a commitment to individualistic accountability and governance. Furthermore, many Unitarian religions merely reduce the human essence to a kind of gross & unorthodox uniformity, as, to become "One" in a grander sense of communal altruism, each and every individual can so easily forget that they must cultivate a sense of such wholeness first from within themselves. For we are only as "divinely human" or "evolved" as we have earned this distinction of character through a kind of transpersonal practice of egoism. For some kinds of self-centrism are not only morally acceptable but are actually morally imperative.

 

As common wisdom recognizes, “We can only give unto others what we have given unto ourselves.” And indeed, we can also only truly and fully achieve spiritual & worldly synthesis & harmony when we have worked on cultivating such qualities from within our core inmost being, before such wealth can be shared, without undue debits, with the outer world. Speaking of seizing wolves by their ears in order that they may be tamed, the most potentially ravening wolf lies within each our own selves if we do not properly & diligently care for its most basic needs.

 

In continuum, percipience and the monitoring thereof is the most powerful & adept tool which we, the human species, have always had at our employment. And how we think, is indeed a life force in and of itself, as it determines so much. Hence, perhaps the most important question for each individual to ask themselves is not: How should I live? but How should I think? The verdict is in. What we think & believe is all that there is. Mind is what matters, and perhaps as theorized by quantum physicists and eastern mystics, is what all matter is composed of itself.

 

Thus perhaps we should seek both a cultivation of mind & spirit first from within ourselves, before we will ever be able to truly reap the fruits of the Holy Spirit in the outer world. The current, and many believe, anachronistic Cartesian-based paradigm of either-or, often dictates a kind of matter over mind, at the costly expense of that which ultimately and truly matters. This well-balanced approach to the Mind-Spirit synthesis has always been held in highest regard especially within the Judaist tradition of intellectuality and the refinement thereof as a means towards achieving spiritual enlightenment.

 

Moreover, the Judeo-Christian tradition better yet, achieves a perfect balance between a cultivation of both Mind and Heart. There is a Latin term: amor intellectualis Dei, which translates roughly as "a love for the mind of God". This translates roughly to the concept that to truly love God means seeking to cultivate as much of this same mind within oneself. And indeed, perhaps if we each, as the individual human entities that we are, continue to allow God to mold our innermost beings into that which we hope the outer world to become, then some fine day we may have reached full fruition despite all human err risked to get there. For if indeed the numinous substance of all things holy and evil are born from each our own cognitions and behaviour, then we all must take diligent heed of which mind-fruits we seek to cultivate, for not all kinds of fruit both sustain and nourish.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

LETTER TO ECKHART, MEISTER

 

 

Sometimes when we are hurting, we begin our own slow but sure self-annihilation. It is almost a sort of wishing of ourselves into nonexistence, as if the phantasy of our own demise can somehow magically substitute for the inevitable actuality of our own mortality. So we construct all sorts of eccentric excuses and philosophies to pull the wool over our own eyes to the glaring Truth-that we do care, and perhaps even more so, in these lucidly sentient moments of quiet desperation. It’s not as if we wish for Death although we very well may have earnestly attempted to sever all possible ties with Life. For, as many intuit, Life is what we truly fear.

 

And the funny thing is, when we have emerged once again from our caves of isolation and darkness, how we look back and can never seem to recall what we were ever fighting against in the first place. Yet this is the nature of all war & truce. And perhaps we do this because we were mistaking what was truly our valiance and our virtue for self-preservation & its methods of retreat. And yet each phase & turn of suffering & then relief bears a seemingly new longing for a time when we will learn how to walk strong and proud, to never falter again. Yet just as much as we wish we could believe this into fruition, we also know that it can never be. So we just reason that maybe this time we will at least gain something worth suffering for.

 

Otherwise, the clock stops and every minute is an eternity, every hour, 100 of them, every day, every week, every month, every year, every decade, century, millennium and the cycle of our innermost evolution continues. And yet still we wonder: Can a human entity, thus so fragile, complex & limited, truly ever evolve? Can we ever really change? And then suddenly someday, we sense a shift from deep within, indescribably intangible yet there, nevertheless. And before we can fully decipher what it is exactly that we had passed our time so studiously & yet seemingly fruitlessly, the fog lifts, and, in a kind of perverse joy & unburdening revelation, we find that we have become the Soul Of Eckhart, laughing at its Creator, as its Creator God, smiles fondly back unto His Creation, knowing that the punch line could never be read in The Answers, but in the absurdist but in the end redemptive tragedy being played out in the edifying process of The Asking itself .

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

NOTITIA INTUITIVA:

ON THE PREEXISTENCE

OF HIGHER WISDOM WITHIN MAN

 

 

Sometimes we feel the Joy well up from deep within, only to just as surely, and just as quickly, beat down its indomitable flames with the highly flammable encloakments of Repression, of course succeeding in merely crafting an incendiary device with far more potentially destructive energial reserves. And the abiding dread of Uncertainty which holds us affixed & enthralled by this fire concerns matters which may consume us, if we heed them not. For that living Gehenna stoked by the friction of our resistance to Nature, & to Life's rites of initiation into the metaphysical membership of Faith & Surrender, is a fire so fierce that it singes either way.

 

But what is it that truly incites the anguish of Man? Perhaps it is not the ominous presence of some dark, unseen principalities which haunts & plagues us so, but rather the undeniable propinquity of the Holy & the Seraphic. For only the beaming face of Love, Hope, & all things transcendent, divine & altogether wholly elusive to the human entity are what rile him so to such Madness & Profligacy. But what of before? And had we an ontological precedent? And will we evolve to some higher ontological antecedent? Had we always, the foreknowledge of all matters celestial, hellish & ecumenical? Is perhaps the mortal's longing for Heaven & his compulsive push towards a Hell of his own making the trailing afterbirth of worlds prior & henceforth?

 

Furthermore, is this proof of the existence of a wholly sovereign Deity divine? The Platonists exalt The Ideal as the assured forerunner of “The Actual.” They believe that if the human Imagination & Intellect houses such Ideals, then surely they must consist of substantiality within some realm. In other words, they believe not only in mind over matter, but Mind as the original essence of matter. Nevertheless, in these current incarnations, this analogia entis is the only epistemic access that humankind has to such esoteric ponderings & pontifications. Although these ruminations indeed serve their purpose as well, guiding us with the aid of Phantasy & Mythos, to the sacred temples of our most meritorious & worthwhile endeavours.

 

And truly, perhaps an embrace of our more intuitive faculties need not be viewed with such hostility & suspicion, as the most egregious sin committed against the demi-gods of all Scientific Inquiry. Indeed perhaps it, in & of itself, is their Redeemer, their Sovereign, their Messiah. For all that we glimpse upon with the Eye of the Anatomy & the Eye of Higher Percipience first took seed within realm of Mind & Spirit. Moreover, a militant stance of corrosive cynicism merely degenerates into all forms of de-humanism, & digression. And as the numinous agencies within Man are again neglected & shunned, he forgets his foreknowledge of both The Future & The Now, leaving him sullen & empty before the crumbling shrine of the false idols of Exigency. For the stuff of the Ultimate can be attained only through the riches of the inmost self. For the implicate order is the Mother & the Father of the very Universe itself. Nothing explicate possesses true ontological bearing without this genesis. For it bears the seed, Pronoia, the forethoughts of God Himself.

 

In finale, truly what separates man from the Beast is not so much his reasoning faculties but that of his discernment, or his higher wisdom. For there is “knowledge” which is of the lower, earthier & ecumenical depths, and there is “wisdom” which is of the higher realms, a distinction which gets lost so easily amidst the socio-political hubris of human society. Yet perhaps we are here now to learn how to properly honour both our earthly, symbolically-denoted“mothers” & “fathers,” while also bowing before the altar of The Divine or Heavenly Father, with those offerings which bloom up from within a human soul, sacrificial offerings which we have salvaged from the ruins of this world's enmity. And perhaps in the process of our individual Life's lessons, we will someday gaze out upon all of the Universe, crafted as it is with such splendid architecture, & alas will see, not only the imago of our Creator God, but most of all, how equally wondrous & exquisite, that of our own.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

ON REACHING A STATE OF HARMONIC DISSONANCE

 

 

We will never be able to know what “really” is-at least within our current corporeal incarnation. We all exist within our own subjective bubbles of relative perception and variations of experience. This is why harmonic coexistence with our fellow humans is oftentimes so difficult. For we are all bound by the laws of inevitable solipsism. The only thing we can know for sure is fully real is that of our own internal phases of consciousness. Although we still must not rely too much upon this existential assurance, as it can so easily be disturbed when we come into conflict with others’ own worlds. It seems, at least upon the macrocosmic surface, that the nature of the natural, material world is chaotic, random and even cruel.

 

Yet many physicists use the term "unitary transformations" to denote the inherent order & consummate Logic to the Universe. A preferred statement of mine is that there is indeed order, albeit order of an "infinite complexity". In other words, there exists an order that, to our "naked" human eye of finitude & myopia, cannot be fully comprehended. Moreover, the problem arises when “I” begins in a tenable position of being in agreement with itself yet comes into hostile or even merely indifferent opposition to that which is not “I” that its own existence begins to assume a menacing or persecutory aspect. Thus, the question is: How can one be both for oneself & for "the other" without losing total ego integrity? This is perhaps a question best left to rhetoric, or to the late but brilliant humanist psychoanalyst R.D. Laing, rest his soul, if he were still with us.

 

It just seems to be a characteristic of this human experience that a great deal of life is spent in seeking harmony between the "inner" & the "outer." And when the “I” does not first trust itself, such existential dissonance is identified with even more strongly, thereby potentially leading one to crushing despair, disillusionment & even projective rage, hostility or even violence towards the so-called "externals.” For in this particular state, the world “out there” seems obstinate and/or hostile towards us, but all begins first from within. And this is important wisdom to adhere to, for once we turn against our very own organism, the search for inner and outer unification is rendered fruitless. For after all, perception molds reality. But are we doomed to repeat an endless cycle of wholeness to fragmentation to wholeness to fragmentation? I think we are. It is yet another intractable feature of our human condition.

 

Yet I suppose, even when we manage to come somewhat to terms with the fact that conflict, suffering & loneliness are inevitable, we nevertheless seek to quell them. There evermore will remain yet another intractable feature of our humanity, to ask questions to which we already inherently possess the answers. Yet perhaps the lesson to cultivate a quiet and full embrace of life and all of its glories and vagaries is, in & of itself, the purpose of this very existence. I suppose the reasoning Intellect will never make sense of the logic of the Spirit, as it will always view, to a certain degree, a submission to life’s vagaries as an act of debasing & ignoble prostration before it.

 

In finale, it is this fallible assumption that becomes the ruin of most things dedicated to transcendental inquiry and exigency. For there is much convenience inherent in casting God as a petty tyrant than as a kindly sage, as we often feel that we could never possibly prove our worthiness of such Divine heritage, & go on seething with a seemingly indefatigable rage against demons & angels we have merely invented inside of our own heads. Hence, where is all of this leading to-this life? An answer? No, because there are just as many as there are questions to complement them. Thus, perhaps the fight has already been won. Must we have it all "figured out" beforehand? We weren’t taught how to breathe now, were we? Perhaps every salient aspect of our human biology & metaphysiology is a function of the autonomic nervous system. Perhaps all this Life & its Guardian & Bestower requires of us is to trust in the inherent perfection of His design & plan, merely awaiting our actualization of it. Perhaps the only way to kill an enemy is to love him. Because the thing is, he was never the true enemy to begin with. Then it would follow that perhaps the only way to kill that so-labeled egoistic, false “I” which threatens to consume us, is not by dying to it but rather bringing it back from the Death it has been for too long already dying, into a life well-versed in Harmonic Dissonance.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

ON SIN & CONSEQUENCE:

A Brief Exegesis

 

 

When we experience conflict & suffering as either a direct or an indirect consequence of sin, this is in large part due to the perception of the loss of God's protection & benediction over us. We are told in the Judeo-Christian Scripture that evil does indeed exist, albeit manifesting itself in ways both overt & subtle, through the malicious words, actions, and even inactions of human individuals acting either in service to Good or to Evil. We are also told that we are not battling against the flesh & the spirit insomuch as we are battling dark, unseen principalities. I personally theorize, as many scientific-minded do, that the spiritual forces we so often commonly refer to as “good” or “evil” are subatomic phenomena which, although they cannot be directly observed, are nevertheless very much sensed & intuited by many sentient beings attuned to them.

 

We are also told that when one serves other idols, demi-gods or gods before the one true & living God, that we will eventually face the consequence of the myriad bodily & even mindly manifestations of illness or disease which afflicts all creatures great & small. And these idols can take the manifestation of both those classical idols of stone, metal, gold, etc. or of more intangible idols such as those afflictions & addictions of thought & emotion. However, contrary to fundamentalist evangelical sentiment, God is not some petty, white-bearded tyrant in the sky who delights in sadistic glee whenever we humans succumb to our various foibles & weaknesses. This variation of theological anthropomorphism however, does seem to be a contentious issue of human cognitive tendency. But the analogia entis reminds us that we were fashioned in God's image, & not the other way around. And, thank God for that!

 

In actuality, it is when we are not seeing God accurately in who & what His character & imago truly is, that we are led into all sorts of venary, plight & other assorted unnecessary embarrassments. And what are these attributes that I refer to in the aforementioned insight? I speak mainly of those concerning how God's nature is to delight in the childlike faith & surrender of His children & to bless us in accordance to our allegiance to Him, rather than to punish us whenever we go astray. Rather, He chastens & corrects in order to protect & preserve. Moreover, as a matter of theological discourse, the Scripture, both Old & New Testament, teaches us that it is actually the work of Satan, or demonic forces, & the work of other human beings which we often confuse with the work of God Himself when we become afflicted.

 

Furthermore, it is these satanic forces which work to give us a distorted image of ourselves, others & especially, of God, which wreaks the most havoc amongst human society. For the Devil wishes to turn us in self-hatred against ourselves, as this is the clearest path he has towards getting us to commit all sorts of injurious and/or ruinous acts upon others. And contrary to the blindly obeisant Nicenean indoctrination that the inmost, core essence of man is vile, base & corrupt, otherwise known as the doctrine of Original Sin, I believe that it is important to come to terms with our darker potentialities & urges. Furthermore, it is also much more psycho-spiritually sound to focus upon cultivating & actualizing our inherent & God-given virtues & character. Ultimately, I have found this to be a much more amenable & efficacious approach to the resistance of Evil.

 

In finale, God's love is always available to us. Is is the immutable essence infusing all of the good, and all of the beauty of this existence. But, it is we who must accept it. It is we who must allow ourselves to be crafted into the person God knows that we can be. And as He builds us up from the inside-out, we may then feel thus empowered & worthy to accept His love & guidance. For I believe that the blessings of existential security & even prosperity offered up to those who live according to God's precepts, are desired by each & every one of His children. For the devil & his legions know when we are feeling unworthy & use our human vulnerabilities & character weaknesses as deft instruments to keep us from experiencing the wholeness & completion that the Holy Spirit offers us.

 

“But what of free will?” so many then ask? Yes, God has granted us our freedoms but with the caveat and the expectation that we will utilize this free will & choice towards pursuits that are most actualizing in a godly way, and that are then, by extension, worthy of God. And many attempt to twist the word of God, precisely because they do not want to be held accountable for their lives. But we forget all too easily the allegory of Eden, don't we? And we cry out “Antinomy! Antinomy! Antinomy! Everything is mere Antinomy and thus is meaningless, meaningless, meaningless!” “But aren't we unconditionally loved by God?” we argue further. Yes, we are. But if one still has the urge to sin against oneself & others, then one hasn't truly reached a place within oneself where they either feel worthy of the love of God, or they are merely resistant to the attendant kenosis & metamorphosis which they must undergo from the inside out, which come along with a genuine acceptance of God's Love & Redemption.

 

Nevertheless and in the end, when all of the semantic & legalistic reductio ad absurdum maneuverings are deployed & depleted, one more transcendental proof continually testifies to the Immutable & the Absolute: God completes us. He fulfills us. He is the Ultimate Source from whence we came & to which we strive to return. In addition, when we are ready to free ourselves to feel worthy of God's love, and let Him into our minds and our hearts, we no longer feel the ominously omnipresent urge to go forth living our lives in resistance to surrender, for we will have been made whole & our weary, trembling souls, will have been quelled by the inimitable presence of His Grace, Benediction, & Assurance.

 

We are all loved unconditionally by God our Creator, and His love & guidance are always available to those who seek it. But we are also still morally accountable to ourselves, others & our God for how we use the lives & individual gifts He has blessed us each with. And indeed, we are likewise responsible for how we navigate the obstacles we have been cursed with. For contrary to popular opinion, there are moral absolutes in this life, despite the compulsions of cultural reductionism, to reduce the wondrous complexity of life into excruciating banality. However, there is, in every circumstance we are placed, a choice to do “right” or to do “wrong.” The variables may be intricate, even tricky & complex, but the solution is ever constant. And its divine alchemations can be found both in God's Word & in the transcendent wisdom granted to those who ask for it.

 

For when we open this sacred tome, humbly asking God to grant us His Holy Spirit that we might reflect upon its immutable truths, God always shines forth His light to guide us in our exegetical travails, however humble or sophisticated they may be. For ultimately, in imago humanus we may struggle & toil, but in imago divinus we are are freed, we are redeemed.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

LADIES & GENTLEMAN, EXHIBIT A

 

 

I am the wild animal that never bites-even when cornered. Tamed by the fear of my own destructive potential, I remain held captive by Freedom in a jungle where Self-Preservation often comes before Thrivance. And thus is my so-called "Civility" perhaps often my gravest weakness, as I am forevermore endangered but never extinct.

 

As a matter of course, I am the creature most visible, camouflaged as I am by the finest wear of Reservation & Stealth. But worser still, I am the beast which must learn to live in passive-aggressive indifference & even feigned opposition to all which comes first-hence, best nature to me.

 

I follow a path both most potentially redemptive and fatally egregious, yet all the while, whatever may come of me, must maintain the pretense that I always come out clean on the other side. And it is indeed, a realm beyond Loneliness where I tread, militantly guarding as I must, against the common impulses of conformity, also knowing full well how such solidarity will merely seek to further estrange and even endanger me.

 

Yet I must remain upon my path nevertheless, as I am all-too-sentiently & wisely aware of how the subversively quiet yet raging hysteria & bandying about of the masses can so often be mistaken for the Utopian ideal attained. For truly, it is distinction which brings true honour, as this is always the most painstaking and perilous path to travail.

 

And it also reigns true that a higher synthesis of Society and Self is the only means to the end of an authentic & abiding soci0-political communion & reformation. And in the end, we must answer each to our own earthly perishing & celestial resurrection of triumphs ignoble or meritorious. For the truest task of our mortal life is not in winning the battles which wage against us in the iniquitous guises & causes of all sublunary magistrates, but lies within the maintenance of that canonical counsel offered up graciously by the hand of the Divine in the form of those truths which have been pillaged from their ruins.

 

For true Victory lies in Surrender-although nottruce-for a side must indeed be chosen where both Heavenly ally & Hadetian foe vie for election. For all worldly authority lacks faith in both its constitution and its consensus. Yet we must also beware of marrying ourselves with blind rebellion against such forces, as this is a bridegroom which must be shared with many. Ultimately, the animal with the best chances for both survival and thrivance is the one which cultivates within itself, enough inner strength & solidarity to be perceived by outside forces as "weak" and "alien", enough righteously cultivated Pride to seek Humility, enough distinction of character to gradually become one with all "others", and most significantly of all, enough creaturely dignity to allow oneself to undergo a gradualism of the spirit, hence to become more & more, fully Divine.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

BETWEEN THE PRIMORDIAL & THE NEOTERIC

 

Virtue is not born from a puritanically incitive invocation of will, but is a surrender to that which already lies intrinsically evident within man. An embrace of so-called "primitivity" is not what turns us into savages, but a denial & gross neglect of the sense of naturalistic morality already lying latent within us through a submission to the indwelling of the Holy Spirit.

 

And we so often smugly assume the methodologies of communal refinement & cosmopolitan acculturation to be the sole genesis of our human sense of morality, but, for the most part, in this case especially, the deemed "cure" is the cancer. For contrary to what the majority believes & socially engineers its inhabitants to become, the displacement of the so-called "primeval" self through the overzealous & spurious attempts at fanatical homogenization is often at the very root of most societal ills.

 

And yet we still project most of our failings upon some inferior "pre-historic" imago, exacting only all the more estrangement from ourselves as individuals & from our species at large, thereby also allowing evil to furthermore brand its indelible signature upon every de-humanist endeavor. Furthermore, working on an individualistic level to transcend each our own destructive potential, is the most effective contribution we can each make towards the preservation of humankind at large.

 

Every individual is responsible for each their own proper governance & actualization, yet this can be obtained only insofar as we each continue working within society at large to fully integrate all aspects of our "private" humanity into the public arena. For we continue to pander to the erroneous & insidious notion that we will be able to maintain our dominion, efficacy & sufficiency not only over each our own selves & lives but over the world without, while we continue to refuse to kneel before the shrine of our more primordial leanings.

 

And although it may very well be true that one cannot serve two masters with equal devotion & fidelity, we must nevertheless strive to appease them both. Yet the whole of this human existence, from the quotidian to the more transcendental, teems with plentiful esteem to be gleaned by all willing to humble ourselves before the altar of each our own humanity & that of others. For the glaring, superficial lights by which so many glean their modern-day esteem are not only harsh & blinding, but are unflattering to our imago on the whole.

 

Yet in the end, as long as we bask within the sickly-pallor of the aforementioned glow, we may at least rest assured that when this light finally burns out, another light altogether will reveal our true visage. And only then will we each feel bolstered enough to step unabashedly & courageously into this light, which will reveal our true totality of being in all of its splendour & inherent perfection. And only then will we come to realize, that the self we had been attempting to shun into silence & non-being all of these years, was the very self that we were striving to honour & preserve.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

HOMONOIA: THE MIND UNIVERSAL

 

 

As children, we learn to see ourselves through the eyes of The Other, which very soon become our own eyes through which we discern an often distorted self-concept. And until we accept the complex, arduous lessons of individuation, embracing each our own Salvation & Redemption through the practice of Personal Accountability, we run the risk of peering too deeply within the mirror of others' reflections of us, thereby losing our center & direction.

 

Yet we eventually come to realize through the wounds that others have inflicted upon us, that rejection & criticism are often masked regard & esteem in cunning disguise on the part of our so-called persecutors. And we learn of the necessity of Authenticity & Truth, uncensored, as the keys to both Heaven above & Heaven on earth. And if we also learn to occasionally let down our guard just enough to the light of the realization that how others see us, is how they see themselves & everyone else, will we slowly come to terms with the sweet synchronicities of this mortal experience & human condition & the immaculate unity holding it all intact.

 

For we are all truly the same organism merely undergoing each our own variant phases of development & expression. Indeed, it is the very vagaries & complexities of our human condition which allow for its exquisite diversity, beauty & grace. Ultimately, by embracing Truth at all costs are we courting true Redemption & Transcendence, as some fine day we will finally come to see ourselves in our totality of entity, bathed within that kind of Light with which the Shadow has learnt, once & for all, to peaceably coexist, and thus will we come to see, that we were indeed all along, fearfully, wonderfully & perfectly made.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

UNITARY TRANSFORMATIONS: A STRIVANCE

 

 

We all battle with the conflicting instincts of Self-Preservation vs. that of what Abraham Maslow coined "Self-Actualization", or that of thrivance over mere survival. And truly, the whole of this human experience is consumed by the search, within each individual soul, for a blissful union of all opposites. Indeed, even much of what we as a humankind have come to discover within all branches of scientific inquiry, those of the hard & soft sciences, parallels this higher, transcendental wisdom. I believe however, not unlike many others, that Science & Spirituality not only must be reconciled to one another, but indeed, they already are. For as the field of quantum or theoretical physics verifies, everything is interconnected at more of a fundamental level than our myopically macroscopic view lends us. It also tells us that we each, in the quantum existential role of "The Observer", co-create what we refer to as "reality" in ways also taken for granted if not completely dismissed by us.

 

Furthermore, the truths inherent within both Science & Philosophy, despite the bifurcation exacted in the name of each their own enquiry & analysis, are a pre-existent actuality of what physicists refer to as "unitary transformations" which converge to meet their apogee of synthesis upon the steeple of a splendid cathedral of intellective architecture, where the meditations & supplications of both Humankind and its Creator find a sanctuary both celestial and ecumenical. And although we may never, due to our current human limitations, be able to sustain a sense & execution of this wholeness & unification, the laws of both Science & Philosophy concur upon the same observation: "Absence of evidence does not preclude evidence of absence."

 

In finale, despite our inherent myopia & finitude, we can all nevertheless strive to make a concerted effort towards the extension of ourselves & each our own special blend of character, temperament & abilities, in a positive direction within this world we now currently inhabit. And although the proverbial shadows will make themselves most manifest in contrast to our strivances towards Truth & Enlightenment, loitering as they do about those luminous effulgence which only a human soul in earnest search for Truth can propagate, the very nature & essence of Truth is to reconcile darkness with light, inscience with prescience, the profane with the transcendent, the inscrutable with the lucid, the simple with the profound. In science, this is that old Ockham's Razor & its principle again being employed which states that: "All things being equal, assume no more than is necessary."

 

And contrary to most worldly wisdom & sentiment, Truth is not more convenient to live by, nor is its path of pursuit the least treacherous or weathering, despite its inherent virtues of Simplicity & Candour. And many of us suffer under the delusion that we must gruelingly earn our keep in this life-that we must painstakingly strive for some sort of Redemption or Salvation. Yet the truth is, we are already saved, in the here and immanent-and indeed, eminent, Now. In the end, all human knowledge speaks, in its own semiotic eloquence of this one truth: Faith in the perfection of all things as they are, is the Master Key to the portal of Heaven above, and Heaven on Earth. But most importantly, the thing we must struggle to remember is that this key lies within each & every one of us. As above, so below? Perhaps first as within, so without.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

ORDINARY HEROES

 

 

Contrary to our human tendency to romanticize and even idolize mere mortals for their extraordinary feats & accomplishments, we are all mere ordinary people attempting extraordinary things.

 

We are, in essence, ordinarily extraordinary.

 

Each and every individual houses latent potential for their own brand of greatness.

 

Unfortunately, many merely just have not yet realized this upon their own journey of self-actualization and thus haven't and, indeed, may never tap into this potential.

 

Nevertheless, this egalitarian philosophy 'tis no mere socio-political sophistry, for we are all equal according to the dictates of each our own unique design, abilities & potentiality.

 

And true & abiding self-esteem rides upon the wings of such a well-balanced worldview.

 

For a recognition of one's own realistically-based exceptional qualities & one's limitations merely sees what is and allows for these to be as they actually exist.

 

It needs boast not, for it has carefully cultivated a position of ontological security through wise decision-making & through living a life of moral fortitude & amour-propre.

 

In truth, I have often observed that the most noteworthy, exceptional people aren't necessarily those who clamour boisterously & bumptiously for the limelight, but those who walk with quiet dignity and inward self-assurance borne of a self-worth cultivated at the divine hand of those things immaterial and intangible.

 

There are heroes among us as we speak. And they are made known through you, me & everyone who takes a stand in the fight to achieve greatness through Humility & a quiet Faith in all things transcendent & just.

 

For what else could the prerequisites for true heroism be in a world of such pernicious evil, subversion & human debasement?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

REALITY AS MYTH: THE NEW ESCAPISM

It seems that Western culture has been undergoing a paradigm shift. It seems to be seeking immersement within fantasy & mythos via the paradoxical conduit of an exploitation of so-called "reality" or "real-life". In essence, the fixation on a more intense realism seems to now serve the function in and of itself, of escapism. Thus it seems, that reality has become myth.

 

Furthermore, as our society loses touch with the romanticism & idealism of yesteryears, we have adopted an interestingly antithetical defense mechanism to cope with this loss of mysticism & enchantment. It could perhaps best be described as a counterphobic kind of attack against the existential anxieties extant to the increasing cultivation of an acute, almost militant brand of hyper-realism & corrosive cynicism now so insidiously prevalent.

 

And as sentimentality & the candid expression thereof, loses its laudable place within society and the culture, and hence, within the individual psyche, we might continue to see a compulsive drive to expose the grittier underbelly of every possible circumstance & happenstance. It seems to be built into the very design of human nature I suppose, to strive to seek wholeness & congruence dwelling as we do in a world which has become increasingly fragmented, dismissive-and indeed, even hostile towards the expression of any authenticity of humanity & traditional spiritual values.

 

Nevertheless, underneath whatever facades we each may feel it necessity to adorn in the fight for the cause of self-preservation & thrivance, we are all romantics & idealists there beneath it all. For the defining characteristics which make us human involve not only those survivalist urges & instincts, but most importantly we must remind ourselves every day, that the most salient essence of that which makes us human is the psycho-spiritual imperative to think, to love and last but certainly not least-to dream & to evolve.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

TRUE FAITH

 

 

Ascetic abstention & abnegation, in & of themselves, are not a sufficient means towards an achievement of moral soundness or psycho-spiritual edification & fruition. In other words, merely refraining from giving way to a homicidal impulse & committing a murder (of any penal classification), doth not, a saint make. We often like to deceive ourselves that, as long as we have ticked off all the boxes of 'Thou Shalt Nots', that we no longer owe our debt to God & Society. We like to think that we can just fade away into the periphery of the landscape of Life, footloose & fancy-free, once we have met our sectarian obligations.

 

But of course, all of this religious piety & torpor is revealed to be yet another blunt yet deft tool of Satan's dark craft, weaving the illusion that ritualistic exactitude clothes one in the finest wear, when it in fact, merely succeeds in wearing one down. Faith, by virtue, exacts something from the seeker of it. True moral fortitude requires risk. It embodies both secular refrain & ecclesiastical dynamism. Although this metaphysical phenomenon often happens in a reverse manner. Instead of the methodology through which Goodness can manifest itself being related only to what we do, it seems quite the opposite most of the time, that we feel to have achieved some moral triumph from within ourselves more so when we have successfully resisted an action of potential or assured evil or destructiveness.

 

Of course, it may seem mere common sense that good must also be proactive and not just passive. However, it is often the simplest truths one most easily becomes blind to. For far less merit & applause are granted to these quieter, subtler & more internal moralistic triumphs. Yet these, of all meaningful & profoundly worthwhile endeavours & victories, are of primary & ultimate significance for the salvation of each & every individual human being. But, of course, this is merely further evidence of the satanic at work as a pernicious & insidious force within the world. For those “dark powers of this world & of the heavenly realms” are surely aware that the most effective way towards the oppression of the virtuous potentiation of a human heart & mind is in keeping them ever distracted & turned away from the very spiritual weaponry of their own salvation, which is always at their disposal through the orthopraxis of both secular abnegation & sacramental fortitude.

 

On the whole, one seeking true faith must submit to the soulsmithing mastercraftsmanship of God, asking in earnest supplication, for Him to craft oneself into a rare & holy shrine of both venal abnegation & discarnate concupiscence. For as Holt Writ tells, faith without works is dead. And furthermore, reading between the sacred lines, religious ritualism, without some sincerity of feeling behind it, is also dead-or worse yet, a putrefying remnant of the living dead, embedding its stench into the soul's flesh of those who don its regalia as proudly & insolently as the devil, his unmasked self flaunts, on All Hallows' Eve.

 

In a word, religiosity is easy, but true faith is scathing & arduous. Although in a reverse proportional sort of way, it also possesses the greatest potential for soteriological edificaton in any fully redemptive sense. Indeed, even Christ Himself had to make that descent into Hades before He was fit for Heaven. And likewise, for us, His floundering disciples, our lives are granted to enact this very same drama of the Grande Design, although we keep asking the same tired questions again & again: What is the meaning of this life? Why are we here? Perhaps we need just accept the fact that we already know the answers to these questions. And perhaps, quite simply yet profoundly, the aim of their nagging insistence which seems to be built into the very blueprint of our ontological machinery, is to goad us on evermore, in finding our way towards true faith & towards the answers to all of life's philosophical inquiries. Because, as any true seeker of faith & salvation comes to see, the answers lie only within the search itself.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A SALVATION WROUGHT IN FEAR & TREMBLING

 

 

(Philippians 2: 12-13)

“...continue to work out your salvation in fear & trembling, for it is God who works in you according to his good purpose.”

 

(2 Peter: 8-9)

“But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is as a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day. The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting that anyone should perish, but that all should come to repentance.”

 

 

Philosophers, and indeed, even many scientists throughout human history have pondered upon that grand enquiry booming from the cavernous void of that branch of academic Philosophy known as Epistemology: “What is reality?” And indeed, although many shun the significance of such an enquiry and a search for its answer or answers, its nagging persistence nevertheless must lend it some credibility and relevance. Moreover, as we are all too keenly aware, we all inhabit the microcosm of the subjective, solipsistic “self” at the same we feel the demand of so-called “civilized society” to reconcile this individualistic nature into that of a more collectively amenable one.

 

And oftentimes I think that the cultivation of some kind of harmonic existential coherence between Self & Society, or between the “inner” world of subjectivity vs. that of “outer” socio-political forces & phenomena is perhaps the main task of this human existence as it seems to consume so much of our energies. For we are all indeed, individuals with each our own experiences & manners of expressivity, and yet we also inherently intuit the underlying unity which governs all things throughout Nature. For although the Cartesian reductionism still so pervasively entrenched within Western mentality claims that the “inner” & “outer” must ever remain in opposition and an epic battle with one another, the indisputable fallacy of its twisted logic is revealed within its very oversimplification of a design of both biology and ontology evident within all organisms to be much more profoundly complex, immaterial and elusive.

 

And although many still cling to these rigid, Lilliputian and indeed, anachronistic paradigms, perhaps it is a pardonable sin in the face of our utter human fragility, myopia & inscience. Thus...Can one ring anything but rancid juice from an over-ripened fruit? Can one ring any juice at all from an under-ripened fruit! Ah! It may indeed be over or under-ripe, but it is by far not yet rancid. For as long as one still has the life-blood flowing in them & the spirit of El Shaddai sustains them, there is the ever-immanent choice of repentance & the due diligence of moral submission. Nevertheless, oftentimes in this life, world-weariness creeps into the bones, & that dark light of worldly knowledge seeps all too deftly & deeply into the cracks of the battered & weary human soul. Yet the problem lies not in this phenomenon itself, but in how we often confuse such perspicacity with depravity. In other words, what we know is not necessarily what we are.

 

Perhaps this is born from the mistaken notion most pervasively expounded upon throughout the millennia by the philosophies of Cartesian dualism & Platonism, that thoughts & feelings, in & of themselves are either completely severed from our behaviour or that mere thought is at best, immediately & quantifiably as affective & effective as actions. Or, as another author put it: “Ontology & epistemology are not independent.” (Paul Alan Wolf, Starwave: Mind, Consciousness & Quantum Physics). Although, for the record, I think he got a little carried away, as we all do sometimes, upon the gossamer wings of esoterica. Not to mention that this particular inquiry of psychological dialectics & its seemingly infinite modalities may perhaps be best left to another essay, where such flights of intellective fancy can best be indulged. However, abstraction is, for some of us, an exercise of affability.

 

Furthermore, Saint Jerome coined the term “synderesis” to denote that innate moral cognizance evidenced within man. And later on, of course, that prolific & ubiquitous Saint Augustine further differentiated Jerome's “synderesis” from what he termed “conscientia”. Augustine's “consciencia” denoted the purely intellectual realm of moral discernment, deduced from human reason or intellect alone. Thereby, did Augustine also conclude this purely human phenomenon of moral prescience to be both fallible and, although not altogether useless, incomplete. Moreover, Augustine was keen to dichotomize the “knowledge” of man vs. the “wisdom” of God thus imparted to man. He believed the “synderesis” of Saint Jerome was never in err, as it was possessed only of the very wisdom, omniscience & absolute moral truth of God Himself.

 

He also compared, if only by analogy, these “metaphysical” laws with the invariancy of those “physical/natural” laws which govern our universe. In a word, Saint Augustine classified the mind of God (Logos) from the mind of man (Conscientia). Augustine understood that the conscience is always subservient to the “logos” due to its need to struggle against that of its inherently human & creaturely limitations in order to discern & actualize “synderesis”. In essence, he clarified for many, how the “conscience” of a man in & of himself, is not only incomplete in its intelligence, but is, by virtue of its entrapment within a mortal & creaturely (rather than demi-deific) incarnation, utterly lost without the inerrantly edifying teachings & scourges of the Spirit. Otherwise one rather shamefully lapses into digressive discipleship with such empty, vapid philosophies (if they can be called that) touted by the likes of those insidious imps called “Atheism” & “Agnosticism”.

 

Without further ado, (and it is, in this case, much ado indeed about quite something), in regards to the lattermost proclamation, it is my own conclusion after many years of grappling with the same issues of theological and philosophical contention myself, that agnosticism & atheism are essentially one & the same doctrine cleverly camouflaged in the doublespeak of sophistry (and yes, atheism, especially, is a doctrine of dogmatistic fervour unparalleled). Agnosticism & Atheism, therefore it seems, are feeble-minded concepts & terms of redundancy. To put it in less fanciful terms: You either believe in God or you don't. One cannot half believe these postulates which most directly & violently subdue & subjugate the “other”-being faith, with equal devotion. Thus yet another tautological & especially, ontological inconsistency lies inherent within this state of esoteric negation, rotting out the very prefrontal cortex of mens sana.

 

I, too, finally had to come to terms with this truth. One cannot, indeed serve two masters, namely as we are speaking of here, the master of Doubt & the Master of Belief. To be sure, it ain't over 'til it's over as the old battle hymn goes, & we will continue to wrestle with some doubt about ourselves, but thank God Almighty I have doubt about myself alone being up to the Sisyphean tasks of this life. Quite frankly, because I, myself, alone would and have already merely floundered in such staunch self-sufficiency (or, self-insufficiency is more like it)! As Gilbert Keith Chesterton once noted of that most ignoble doctrine of self-reliance: “Shall I tell where the men are who believe most in themselves? ...They are all in lunatic asylums!” Of course, we today might brandish the verbal swordplay of our forthwith idioms of discourse, nevertheless, philosophical & theological truths always transcend politics.

 

Or even better, as G.K. Chesterton keenly & in his delightfully playful style once observed: “It would be much truer to say that a man will certainly fail, because he believes in himself.” Yet, should one cloister oneself away from the world in order to avoid one's own nefarious actualization? Or is this merely, the null exchange of one sin for another? And is this is so, which is a worser sin? For after all, virtues, when overextended, become sins, although all sins will always remain, sins. Good can be transformed into evil, but evil, never into good-at least not by the will of man alone. But perhaps this is that paralytic agent thus identified, of the human soul, as its makes its perilous way towards its fullest potentialization. Perhaps it is crippled by its very own discernment of the nature of good & evil, hence, the Edenic scene.

 

It knows all-too-well that evil, or the darkness, once fully embraced is that much more harrowing to be released from. Thus we fear our own actualization towards the light & towards good, for we know how impotent we often are in the face of our own temptations towards evil. However, we are not completely helpless. For after all, the very fact that we exist to be gripped & plagued by such anxieties must mean that there is a sovereign & benevolent Deity there to sustain & guide us, for we certainly did not create ourselves & cannot manage of our own accord. The old argument from ontology might be perceived as some, as a weak argument, nevertheless I would then concede that the doubt & even hostile refutation of the agnostics & the atheists is bound by the same phenomenon of consciousness.

 

And, paradoxically & amusingly enough, it often seems to some believers that atheists and some agnostics seem even more dogmatic in their convictions than the average Christian. As a matter of truth, most believers & practitioners of Judeo-Christianity are rather even-tempered. The very submission to both Old & New Testament principles in fact, provides the perfect synthesis & balance for the human soul. Judaism is a perfectly edifying tool for the Intellect, & Christianity, for the Spirit. Yet, regardless of all esoteric musings, I think it comes down to allowing God to train us in not only the way that we should go, but most importantly, in the way that we should think. And sometimes I think that we've got it all wrong. Instead of overly focusing upon the methodology through which Goodness can manifest itself being related only to what we do, it seems quite the opposite most of the time, that we feel to have achieved some moral triumph from within ourselves more so when we have successfully resisted an action of potential or assured evil or destructiveness.

 

Of course, virtuous actualization must also be proactive and not just passive as in the latter sense of self-restraint. Yet, rather unfortunately, far less merit & applause are granted to these quieter, subtler & more internal moralistic triumphs. Yet these, of all meaningful & profoundly worthwhile endeavours & victories, are of both primary & ultimate significance for the salvation of each & every individual human being. Yet this is merely further evidence of the satanic at work as a pernicious & insidious force within the world. For those “dark powers of this world & of the heavenly realms” are surely aware that the most effective way towards the oppression of the virtuous potentiation of a human heart & mind is in keeping them ever distracted from & turned against the very spiritual weaponry of their own salvation , which is always at their disposal through the orthopraxis of both secular abnegation & sacramental fortitude.

 

Satanic principalities also attempt to oppress the healthiest aspects of human thought, emotion & expressivity, because they are aware also, how these things are a human individual's most superconductive conduit for holy communion as it relates to the self & God, & towards fruitfulness within the world as it extends in full faith from God to self to other human beings. Furthermore, we also tend to think about spiritual phenomena in the wrong way as well, as being something not only wholly quantifiable, but as something that is permanently fixed or static. Yet in fact, because physicists have now verified this to be the ultimate nature of subatomic physical reality, all is in a constant dynamic of flux, or in the process of some kind of energial transformation according to the first law of thermodynamics & the various laws of symmetry.

 

Evil can also, as a metaphysical phenomenon just as quickly transform into good with the catalyst of the right choice made by a human individual. And good, in turn, can also quickly become evil if the wrong moral choice is made. And, not unlike the electron-positron pair annihilation observed by physicists being in a steady state of activity, the epic battleground of Good vs. Evil also plays out on a more metaphysical scale. Indeed, there are some, myself included, who have pondered whether or not subatomic phenomena itself is not perhaps those “unseen principalities” (see Ephesians 6:12) referred to in Holy Scripture. Of course, even the so-called “hard sciences” can never compare, in their proclaimed sacrosanctioning, to intellectualis Dei (the Mind Of God). Most of what we think we know is still mere postulate.

 

In essence, what I am relaying is that we must all each continue to “work out our salvation in fear & trembling” (Philippians 2:12-13) as there is no fixed guarantee that any one person can rest on their laurels, or indifference about their fantasized “goodness” or “badness.” The only thing which truly & ultimately exists is personal accountability & the choices wrought from either an embrace or an abnegation of this golden principle. It is our choices, and only our choices which determine both our earthly & celestial reaping & merits in the eyes of the Lord God Almighty.

 

“...being confident of this one thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ.” (Philippians 1:6)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

BLESSED ASSURANCE

Sometimes we must tap into our own loneliness before we can find completion in Christ alone. It is often when we feel the least truly seen by others that we come to a higher and much deeper understanding of ourselves. Our view sharpens most in clarity when we feel mired within the murky uncertainty of our existence. Tethering our intentions and channeling our energies becomes both much harder and much easier in the face of life's vagaries, the indifference and often cruelty of others, and in the face of our own overwhelming ennui.

 

But thankfully, our Heavenly Father always provides for us, something to renew our spirits so that we can continue on in the uniquely calibrated and fated purpose for our lives. We may never be able to predict with specificity what form that empowerment and encouragement may come in. But we can rest in the knowledge and in the hope that if we persevere, it will come. Resilience in the face of opposition is more a matter of determination and self-respect, both of which have been finely cultivated through all of our trials and travails.

 

He indeed shall perfect His works both without and from within each of our individual souls and bring it all to completion some fine day. And then, we will know beyond a shadow of a doubt what it has all been for. And not being certain but choosing to trust in an Almighty and Holy God is the root of true faith. And He shall also continue refining that as well. We only must choose each new day to move forward in self-actualization and courage.

 

 

 

 

 

 

THE HIDDEN SINS OF BLIND CONFORMITY:

SELF-ACTUALIZATION AS A MORAL IMPERATIVE

Psalm 51:6

Surely you desire integrity in the inner self, and you teach me wisdom deep within.

1 Corinthians 12:4-6

Now there are varieties of gifts, but the same Spirit. And there are varieties of ministries, and the same Lord. There are varieties of effects, but the same God who works all things in all persons.

 

I find it absurd how many self-professed ‘Christians’ demonize those individuals who take full accountability for their own individuation instead of merely ‘fittingin’. It’s rooted in a false doctrine that to be ‘obedient’ is to be totally devoid of any individual characteristics or discernment! This view is, in fact, not supported ANYWHERE in the Holy Word. I like how David Schrock put it when he said: “The body of Christ calls for individuality, not individualism.” Although he was addressing another issue. We are each called by our Father Creator to develop each our own unique personalities and gifts so that we can put them into proper service in His Kingdom. If we don’t develop self-knowledge, we will not know how to grow and learn as disciples, but will instead be tossed about by the waves and will remain double-minded and digressive.

 

Furthermore, speaking of 'blind conformity', I am addressing the kind of blind obedience which certain people might use as justification for malfeasant and/or socially harmful actions and/or inactions. The positive and pro-social kind of conformity is, of course, a necessary societal construct in maintaining moral order, etc. Yet, while conformity certainly has its virtues and I am not disputing that, there are many ways that it can also be harmful and unhealthy when it is the kind of conformity adopted blindly.

 

Each individual person has a moral imperative to develop each their own talents and interests in order to better serve the collective. Individuality must be honoured to a certain degree so that this synthesis and symbiosis between the individual and the collective can thrive best. Now, I am not speaking of the generic kind of 'individuality' spouted by popular culture, the likes of which David Schrock's words were addressing that I mentioned earlier. This kind of individuation is shallow and facile. In a word, we are all inherently 'different', so any kind of forced cultivation in most cases is false. The kind of differentiation of which I speak is that spoken of by Abraham Maslow and Carl Jung in particular.

 

Maslow, who was a North American born psychologist active mainly during the early part of the 20th century, developed the theory of a 'hierarchy of needs', which explored the necessity of what he coined 'self-actualization' for each human individual to achieve maximum health and happiness. Carl Gustav Jung was a Swiss born psychiatrist who is considered the 'father of modern psychoanalysis.' Jung also recognized, as an ontological necessity, what he termed 'individuation', to be a part of any human being's mental and what he called 'psycho-spiritual' health. In this brief article I will be outlining what I consider to be the benefits of self-actualization and individuation, as well as briefly touching upon the more deleterious or harmful effects of a neglect of one's own unique design.

 

Primarily, the first benefit is pretty basic and speaks for itself. When an individual works to develop their own identity and skills even at the expense of becoming 'cast out' by the social majority, society as a whole is much better off for that individual's efforts at sharing those abilities and talents within it. Furthermore, when we 'take up our own cross' of individuation, we are generally much happier, healthier and productive and pro-social beings. Therefore, contrary to the misconception, the cultivation of each our own happiness and contentment and success in life is not an ANTI-social act, but rather a decidedly PRO-social one! And it is not 'selfish' in the way that most people classify it.

 

There are two kinds of 'self-centeredness'. One is narcissistic and pathological and the other is empathic and healthy. As the adage goes, “One cannot serve from an empty vessel.” And to that I would add, “One cannot serve from a shattered vessel.” Thus, we can see how we are actually called by our Father God and Creator to develop our gifts and unique interests and talents to better serve Him and our fellow human beings. In essence, when we 'love' and respect ourselves enough to embrace our own development, we are also in turn, heeding God's very command to love and serve others as we love ourselves, and to love and dedicate our lives to honoring God with our devotion, time and gifts.

 

The world is so much better off and much more interesting and challenging with each our own truest selves being deployed in it! And although this journey can be frightening and arduous more often than not, at least we have paved the way for the next brave soul who follows in our footsteps on their own path to self-actualization.

 

Furthermore, let's explore the 'dark underbelly of the beast' known as blind conformity. During many dark periods of human history, many individuals, full of malice and motivated by all sorts of reprobate and evil ideologies, have caused unimaginable suffering to the human race, all rationalized and indeed, even championed, under the guise of nationalistic, religious or otherwise general communal 'solidarity'. And as Oscar Wilde once observed “Patriotism is a virtue of the vicious.”

 

Although I personally think the word “nationalism” to be more apt, what he was getting at was, that the 'majority rule' does not preclude a system of moralistic checks and balances which needs to be operant in order to ensure less abuses of power. In fact, many would surmise that, the more people who seem to be blindly and vigorously jumping on the bandwagon about something, the less likely what they are supporting is both rationally and/or morally sound. Thus, bringing me to my main point concerning blind conformity as an inadequate and actually sinful substitute for individuation.

 

The main ways that blind conformity contributes to more evil rather than good in society is that it interferes with the mental, emotional, spiritual, social and vocational health, genuine self-esteem & wholeness of each person who adheres to it. Societal evils such as physical, sexual and mental/emotional abuse, especially of children become prevalent. Many do not see the connection between this, but I guarantee you, there absolutely is. One's own personal accountability for one's own life trajectory are essential to each our own ability to proceed in a positive and pro-social manner towards psycho-spiritual growth and functionality.

 

In finale, many character disturbances and disorders are both directly and indirectly the result of neglect of one's own spiritual, moral and general existential responsibilities to the collective AND the individual. Moreover, a daily application and practice of self-reflection and examination are moralistically imperative towards the proper development of our innermost being and character. In essence, we must first 'Know thyself,' if we are to be able to contribute in any healthy and robust way to those persons and causes whose paths we will cross and whose tasks we shall undergo out in society.

 

Cultivating self-awareness is also elemental to our ability to develop empathy towards others as well. On the whole, all human beings, despite our inherent uniqueness, share a common enough psychological makeup to be able to understand one another. And all that is required for the most part to understand another, is to reflect honestly upon ourselves, as we are fundamentally and philosophically similar. Thus, we can see how the striving for self-actualization and individuation enables us to be the best that we can be both for ourselves and for others. For every person who chooses the long, hard and often lonesome road of inner truth, that many more choose the wide and smooth road of blind conformity, and the world does suffer for it.

 

We are all so valuable to our Father God that He calls each and every one of us to develop each our own talents, skills and personalities not only for others' benefit, but also because He wants us to be happy and fulfilled. And the only way towards an authentic sense of deep and abiding peace and joy is by compromising the illusory pleasures and glittering generalities of 'fitting in' at any cost. Because in the end, 'fitting in' with ourselves is what we all desire deep down.

Each individual is a part of an irreducibly complex matrix of give and take. What I have to offer others and the world at large may not seem to always carry that much weight considering the vastness of our universe and the ever-increasing human populace, but I can at least take assurance in the fact that what I contribute is helping someone out there and is coming from an authentic place. The mysterious and wondrous workings of metaphysical mechanics have always been calculated to be a quality over quantity equation anyhow.

 

1 Peter 4:10-11 (NIV)

10 Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms. 11 If anyone speaks, they should do so as one who speaks the very words of God. If anyone serves, they should do so with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen.

 

 

 

 

 

 

GNOSIS, AN EMERGENCE

It is oftentimes easier to believe in the devil than it is to believe in God. For such a thing is so easy to fall prey to when the sentient organs of mortal human experience, by Truth's indiscriminate hand, are dealt the first blows of the profane.

 

Yet without first, recognition of Tragedy, even Comedy turns tragic and then there would be no evident or immediate cause for redeeming ourselves. But perhaps Tragedy is overrated and we do not need it as much as we think that we do. Perhaps the true Tragedy is in how we continually seem to compulsively create something out of what is essentially, nothing of true substance or importance.

 

But now, once the acknowledgment has been made, how exactly do we let go of it all in order to better our species? For as anyone beyond a certain age of cognizance is all too sentiently made aware, nothing can truly be held onto or even let go of for long in this life of transience.

 

And the very act of surrender requires an inscience of self-sense which we do not even naturally possess and that probably would not be in our best interests to coddle anyway.

 

In continuum, perhaps however it is within human nature to still wonder if it is necessary for life to be so consumed and potentially jeopardized by this existential juggling act which we must perform with such exactitude every day. Yet this is where the Metaphysical comes into play: the matter behind Mind vs. Matter, Good vs. Evil, the Material vs. the Intangible, the Logical vs. the Intuitive, and, last but certainly no least, the Self vs. Others.

 

Although many believe these struggles to be the very meaning of this human life journey itself. And this philosophy indeed does not betray legitimacy, as more than half of a human life is expended upon the pursuit of some higher knowledge as to how this life can best be lived. And indeed, perhaps it would not be hyperbole to state that every moment of human consciousness is wrought with the weight of choice. For no matter how seemingly large or small, the energy expended for the seeming mundane minutiae of this life seems to interfere with the fullest actualization of our higher selves and faculties.

 

In finale, I suppose the philosophical theme of Survival vs. Thrivance will always play itself out no matter how we may attempt to ignore it. Yet it cannot be wholly denied, that no matter how much we attempt to attribute a factor of nihility to each our own existences or fates, we all nevertheless feel a pull towards something far from arbitrary, nor worthy of our feigned Apathy or Indifference. For every organism throughout Nature possesses an undying instinctual drive towards the pursuit of Life over Death, or Production over Destruction.

 

And no matter how melancholic or even ambivalent we may feel, there is always a faint murmur of Exultation and Life-Force felt within us, striving to potentiate itself. And even in those moments of human extreme, such as with suicidal ideation or inclination, there is never a true desire for Death, but rather, a fear of facing Life and what this might further exact from us beyond what we, in these moments, already feel we have had stolen from us or has been ravaged within us.

 

And indeed, whatever we choose to call this invisible yet dynamic force guiding us all towards our transcendence or our demise, we all feel and sense it. We all sense that there must be a greater purpose to our existence, and not merely because it is comforting to think so. As a matter of discourse, I personally find it much more trying to believe in a God or a Higher Power behind all things. Life is in truth, not so much easier to adopt an atheistic attitude towards, all things as many deistic skeptics may believe. Life is actually not only more challenging to believe in things like a God whom I must honour and revere in word, action and even intent, but it is also much more complicated as such.

 

Nevertheless, I have always believed such concepts to be inherent within humankind anyway. To clarify, even the self-professed atheist cannot truly and fully disbelief in higher spiritual realities because I believe these things are a part of our design. I suppose this is in tandem with St. Augustine's ontological argument for the existence of a higher spiritual being. But in closing, is not humankind's ability to imagine and to conceptualize the very foundation upon which all of our greatest achievements are solidly built? And if we could continue working to synthesize the Metaphysical with the so-called Practical, or rather, the Platonian weltanschauung with the Aristotelian one, there is no telling what we might achieve.

 

EX TENEBRIS, LUX

Sometimes the Darkness is there to lead us to the Light.

I have come to believe in Good, because of the intractable presence of Evil.

I have arrived upon a faith in a higher power, because of those principalities which reside below.

I have managed to cultivate Virtue, only through the refiningly dark graces of Turpitude.

 

I have gained priceless Wisdom in the face of abject Inscience.

I have come to know of the infinitude & omnipotence of Love only while seized by the terminable torpidity & inconsolable despair & anguish, of Hate.

I have only truly glimpsed of Heaven only after a descent into Madness & Hell.

I have found Salvation only on my way towards Damnation.

I have learned of Surrender & Serenity only in the face of futile Resistance & Dissonance.

I have found common ground with Communal Solidarity only while walking alone the full distance, in StoicSolitude.

I most gaily danced with Destiny whilst languishing within an unshakeable sense of Meaninglessness.

I courted Canonical Consummation & Existential Bliss while being savagely spurned by Godlessness & Nihility.

Within the rapacious arms of Terror, I found myself indescribably comforted & delivered by the indomitable presence & sovereign power of Grace.

In my perpetual Affliction & Exile, do I continue to find Healing & Hearth.

Through the blindingly harsh glare of lights which seek to brand upon me, an imago false & unjust, have I always found my Truest Self & Actualization.

Through the simplest of Life's Joys, have I also always briefly touched upon the least mundane revelations & Inward Transformations.

Whilst enthralled by the illusions of the Flesh, have I learned of that true Freedom found only, in Bondage to the Spirit.

 

 

 

 

 

THE SPEAR & THE WARHEAD

 

 

With Primal Intuition we should declare ourselves definitively sane in the face of all of the vagaries & licentious delirium which this mortal human flesh may visit upon us. May we hereby discharge our wanton shadow from the ghost asylum of reticence and self-loathing which puritanical tyranny and the pretenses & posturings of austere nobility so unnaturally cultivate. For we are all achingly aware of the true apostasy we must commit daily before the ecumenical altars of so-called Social Order & Industry.

 

Yet, not unlike the true nature we must often shun, nothing is ever just either-or, but is always all-of-the-above and at-the-same-time. It is the infinite Quantum Void, ever teeming with mere probability or possibility until we choose and thereby externalize the internal, all remaining in mere ontological suspension until then. Furthermore, one individual's Civility & Order is another's utter Savagery & Chaos. Moreover, the "depraved anarchy" and portentous "damnation" often so smugly & sententiously predicted by those of the former kind, is in actuality usually experienced by the latter kind as their only Reason & Redemption.

 

It is often touted that resistance to that which is most natural is rewarding in it preventive or safeguarding effects, but, we must examine, preventive of what, exactly? My thoughts on that have always been that all was created to possess a particular intrinsic perfection of design & nature. And perhaps Essence should always be honored as preceding Existence, even, & perhaps especially in the face of those dictates of revision so militantly urged & enforced by the Political Architects & Social Engineers of any given milieu.

 

Yet I suppose, many will continue to pay heed only to the stifling dogmas of Doctrine & Denomination. Yet what they fail to realize is how this blind adherence merely seeks to exact from Humanity, a diffusion of Ipseity, and therefore, any ultimate ethical or moral soundness or efficacy amongst society. For this furthermore merely reduces the human essence to a kind of gross & unorthodox uniformity, as, to become "One" in a grander sense of communal altruism, each and every individual must cultivate a sense of such wholeness from within themselves. We are only as "divinely human" or "evolved" as we have earned this distinction of character. And indeed, cogito ergo sum asserts its dominion once again, for we are also only that which we believe that we are, and the same applies to how we interact with the so-called external world.

 

In continuum, percipience and the monitoring thereof is the most powerful & adept tool which we, the human species, have always had at our employment. And how we think, is indeed a life force in and of itself, as it determines so much. Hence, perhaps the most important question for each individual to ask themselves is not: How should I live? but How should I think?

 

The verdict is in. What we think & believe is all that there is. Mind is what matters, and perhaps as theorized by quantum physicists, is what all matter is composed of itself. Thus perhaps we should seek a cultivation of our minds before we will ever be able to truly cultivate the fruits of the Spirit-a religio mentis, if you will, as in the longstanding Judaist tradition. The current Western Cartesian-based paradigm often dictates a kind of matter over mind, at the costly expense of that which ultimately and truly matters.

 

Moreover, I have always held in high regard, the Judaist tradition of intellectuality and the refinement thereof as a means towards achieving spiritual enlightenment. To clarify, I would like to use a personally preferred term “amor intellectualis Dei”, which translates roughly as "a love for the mind of God". This means that to truly love God means seeking to cultivate as much of this same mind within oneself. And indeed, perhaps if we each, as the individual human entities that we are, continue to mold and shape our inward beings into that which we envisage the so-called outer world to become, then some fine day we may have reached full fruition despite all human err risked to get there. For if indeed the numinous substance of Ideation is the eventual stuff of Actuality, then we all must take diligent heed of which mindfruits we each seek to cultivate, for not all kinds of fruit both sustain and nourish.

 

 

 

 

 

ATHEISM VS. THEISM

 

 

Without further ado, (and it is much ado indeed about quite something), it is my own conclusion after many years of grappling with the same issues of theological and philosophical contention myself, that atheism is a term (& credo) of both fallacy & redundancy. I often think when people profess their Atheism: “Yes, but deep down, do you really believe that?” To clarify, it is self-evident that we “mere mortals” possess at least a working knowledge of things deific, otherwise how could I be writing this essay? “God” or “a god” or “gods” would nary be on my mind at all, let alone in dispute. My contention is that, therefore, such an entity (deific) must have endowed homo sapiens with the ability to discern him, her, or it. Higher wisdom (notitia intuitiva) & knowledge of morality, virtues, salvation, damnation, etc. are self-evidently innate in humankind. Therefore, I do not even believe that there can exist such a creature as “an Atheist”, from a strictly logistical standpoint, that is.

 

I also finally had to come to terms with this truth, as we all will at some point, that one cannot, indeed serve two masters, namely as we are speaking of here, the master of Apostasy & the Master of Belief (or Faith). Now, to be sure, we will continue to wrestle with some doubt about ourselves, & about other prescient matters, but thank God Almighty I have doubt about myself alone being up to the Sisyphean tasks of this life. Quite frankly, because I, myself, alone would and have already, merely floundered in such staunch self-sufficiency (or, self-insufficiency is more like it)! As Chesterton once noted of that most ignoble doctrine of self-reliance: “Shall I tell where the men are who believe most in themselves? ...They are all in lunatic asylums!” Of course, we might enjoy brandishing the verbal swordplay of our forthwith idioms of discourse, nevertheless, philosophical & theological truths always transcend politics or as the Ancient Greek philosopher Parmenides addressed in his didactic poem “Doxai”, “the opinions of mere mortals”. Or even better, as G.K. Chesterton keenly & in his delightfully playful style once observed: “It would be much truer to say that a man will certainly fail, because he believes in himself.”

 

Yet all in all, there is a major distinction between “doubt” and outright apostasy. In fact, “believers” are often plagued with more doubt than self-proclaimed “non-believers”, mainly due to the fact that we remain open, at least to the possibility that we may be in err, & atheists, for the most part, remain quite closed off to self-examination (which is perhaps in some cases a salient purpose which their “atheism” serves). Yet, should one cloister oneself away from the world completely in order to avoid that of one's own nefarious actualization? Or is this merely, the null exchange of one sin for another ( as in the case of “evil” triumphing through atheistic passivity & apathy)? And if this is so, which is a worser sin: To embrace “atheism” & perhaps find salvation (at least in a strictly “materialistic” sense) through nihilism, or to embrace “faith” & risk doing more harm than good by being actively engaged with the outer world, whilst battling the forces of evil which seem to push more strongly against “believers” than “non-believers”? For after all, virtues, when overextended, can also be transmogrified into sins, although all sins will always remain, sins. Good can be transformed into evil, but evil, never into good-at least not by the will of man alone.

 

But perhaps this is yet another paralytic agent thus identified, concocted specially for the human soul, as its makes its perilous way towards its fullest potentialization. Perhaps the human soul is crippled by its very own discernment of the mercurial, & tumultuous nature of evil, hence, the Edenic scene. It knows all-too-well that evil, or those “dark principalities unseen”, once fully embraced, are that much more harrowing to be released from. Thus we fear our own actualization towards the light & towards good, for we know how impotent we often are in the face of our own temptations towards evil & the extraction therefore, from its Herculean grasp. However, we are not, completely helpless. After all, the very fact that we exist to be gripped & plagued by such anxieties must mean that there is a sovereign & benevolent Deity there to sustain & guide us, for we certainly have not thus far managed of our own accord. The old argument from ontology might be perceived as some, as a weaker argument, nevertheless I would then concede the doubt & even hostile refutation of this to be bound by the same phenomena of consciousness. Meaning, that an Atheistic stance often springs directly from a limited human mind reacting in absolutist refutation to matters that it feels overwhelmed by & cannot fully comprehend.

 

And, paradoxically & amusingly enough, it often seems to some believers that atheists and even some agnostics seem even more dogmatic in their convictions than the average self-professed Christian. As a matter of truth, most believers & practitioners of Judeo-Christianity are rather even-tempered & level-headed. The very submission to both Old & New Testament principles in fact, provides the perfect synthesis & balance for the human soul. Speaking colloquially, Judaism is a perfectly edifying tool for the Intellect, & Christianity, for the Spirit. Furthermore, Judaism has always planted its roots in a strong intellectual foundation, along with a moralistic one. And to that I say: Let's put the Judeo back in Christianity! After all, I take it on faith that our Lord & Saviour intended it no other way. As a Rabbi once noted, “An ignorant man cannot truly be devout.” The more one comes to know, in fact, the more one comes to a solid synthesis of truth & understanding, especially as it applies to the realms of Esoterica & the like. Intelligence, contrary to the “Atheistic” viewpoint, is not always in inverse proportion to a belief in God or a sovereign & supernal force which created, sustains & guides all to its eternal resting (or toiling) place. Which is why any “religion” or “philosophy” worth its salt-of-the-earth, so to speak, will encourage its disciples to actively seek out the methods of not just that of its own spiritual edification & submission, but that of its own intellectual fruition.

 

To be sure, not everyone is a born intellectual, & that is perfectly okay. Yet we are all endowed by our Creator with enough cognitive capacity to at least be earnest in our search for how to submit our lives, skills, talents, etc. to His bidding while we are granted life upon this earth. God measures what spirit we live in, not how “clever” we are (or are not). In finale, as with all things, balance. No more of this: Head over Heart! No! No! Heart over Head! Nonsense. We have both & we should strive to develop both to the best of our intentions & abilities. Of course, each human individual is inherently endowed with an uneven balance of intellect & intuition, on way or the other. But it is important, if even just for our own mental health, (which has a direct influence on all else), that we continue to grow in the most optimal & positive direction. As it has been said: “One cannot serve from an empty vessel.” To that I add, one can serve from an empty vessel, but most likely will not serve the world well & may even commit egregious evils against oneself & others in the process. Personally, for me, it is decidedly more difficult to embrace Faith than Atheism, as it holds me 100% accountable for every waking moment. Yet we should let this serve as refutation of the Atheist's claim that we believe in things such as God & an afterlife in Heaven merely because it is more comforting.

 

In its own way, this can also serve as proof to some extent that there is a benevolent & sovereign Deity who created me, sustains me & wishes to guide me to my optimum actualization, & who knows, in His infinite wisdom, that an “easy”, life would ultimately do me more harm than good. After all, remember the teacher in school who actually helped you to learn & challenged you above & beyond what you thought yourself capable or who helped you to unearth some latent talent or ability? These teachers are often the least liked & popular, but the most efficacious in the end. Hmmnnn... I think there just may be something to that.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

YADA, YADA, YADA

 

 

In Hebrew, one of the possible translations of the word “yada” means “to get to know”. So, I suppose when we say, “Yada, yada, yada...” we are either denoting the fact that we, along with those whom we are addressing, are already familiar with (or “know”) that which it is we are talking about; or perhaps that we are trying, as we speak, to process or “wrap our heads around” (a.k.a. “get to know”) something which we are pondering aloud. And there may even be some other interpretations thereof. Nevertheless, we all could benefit from a lesson or two in the fine social art of communication with our fellow human beings. This, especially in the face of what is referred to in the realms of Philosophy as “Solipsism & the Problem of Other Minds”, 'tho perhaps deemed redundant (& even futile) by some, is of salient significance in this milieu of “cyber-communication”.

 

Of course, let us just start off from the beginning by stating that wholesome & beneficial communications can be made only between two parties equally divested in such a goal. To clarify, one person may very well be honed in the art of precise, & wholesome communication, yet find, to their frustration that the “other” person has not yet honed their “listening” skills properly. Or, in the context of written and/or “typed” communication such as most of us must conduct on the Internet from day to day, some very well-spoken individuals may come across another person whose “reading comprehension” is lacking. Moreover, what Communications scholars call “paralinguistics” is also not able to be discerned when one is communicating through a computer keyboard & monitor (unless they're “Skyping”, etc.). Paralinguistics are those elements of communication such as tone of voice, body language, eye contact, etc. which aid in the full comprehension of not only what another is attempting to express & communicate, but even perhaps what kind of a personality & temperament an individual may have, all of which can facilitate smoother & more fruitful interactions with our fellow human beings.

 

This is why I find it of extreme importance that we all take it upon ourselves to work at clearer articulation, especially when we “cyber-netting”. Mind you, it is, as with all things concerning the realm of humans, largely a matter of context-in this case, social context-nevertheless, we can all benefit from working to lessen some of the misunderstandings, & even all-out clashes that can arise out of not communicating or listening adeptly to both our own words, and those of others. Of course, as stated above, not every individual is on a similar “wavelength”, if you will, & we must tailor each our own social realms to this reality, but if we become too sacrosanct within our own bubbles of “similar-minded” people, the we miss out on a lot of opportunities for personal growth.

 

Indeed, some of my own personal revelations & inward triumphs & transformations have been borne from the most unlikely of social “wombs.” I like to challenge myself to step outside of my “comfort zone” because my past experiences have shown me that a lot of unearthed treasure usually lies behind those doors. Therefore, I cultivate broadmindedness, so that I can properly humble myself before the vastness & diversity that is this world, & come to acquaint myself with persons, & experiences which I might not inherently seek out or identify with.

 

Yet fundamentally, we are all the same organism undergoing each our own levels of development in our own idiosyncratic ways. This is why I don't feel undue fear about opening myself in this way to the world outside of myself, because I see myself mostly reflected in it more than seeing it as being completely alien to me. And most human beings probably feel the same way that I do. In psychological parlance, at least from the “Jungian” perspective, this achievement of inward & outward synthesis is referred to as “integration.” And I believe this to be essential to the spiritual attunement of each individual's radar, so that we can first, come to terms with all aspects of ourselves, & thus, offer the same empathy & acceptance to others as well. To play on a phrase, “It begins at home,” or just, “It begins from within.”

 

Furthermore, in keeping with the subject of the human dialectic, yada, yada, yada, one needn't be a master wordsmith in order to be able to connect with other people. From my own observations & “field practice”, all it takes is a willingness to humble ourselves before the shrine of self-awareness. Here's a little syllogism to break what I mean down into more digestible tidbits: I am human. You are human. I understand myself in my own humanity. Therefore, I can understand you in your own humanity. Now, mind you, this is by no means intending to be flippant or facetious. I realize that none of us can identify or even fully understand everything about everyone, including our own selves.

 

My point is this: Starting from a base of the ways in which we are similar will help us get through the “rough patches” of where we might “clash” or just differ. I personally believe there to be to many complex facets to any human person. Therefore, in the name of expediency & a spirit of unification, we sometimes must simplify things. For example, you might have a different “personality type” than I do, but I guarantee you, if we both work at it, we can find common ground in something simpler, or even in some deeper, more core values & human features. And these lie at the root of the person anyhow, so differences in anything else in comparison should be deemed spurious.

 

There are different “Temperaments”, there are different “Personality Types”, there are uniquely “solipsistic” phenomena of consciousness such as what we generally refer to as “life experiences” and worldviews. Yet fundamentally, we all share the same genetic “human” characteristics-including those so-called “intangible” elements such as our psychology (philosophically speaking) & our sense of spirituality, or what I like to refer to as our “meta-physiology”.

 

Thus, no matter what our “socio-economic background”, political affiliation, personality type, temperament, geographical location, ethnicity, let us please be mindful of how we treat our fellow human beings in word & deed. What we do & say to others has a very profound impact-more than we know. What we do unto another, we, in turn, do unto ourselves, & as a certain bard of world renown once quoth: “Slowly doth heal those wounds which men give themselves.” We must remind ourselves in the face of a world which seeks to divide us at every impasse: We're all in this together. But, need more be said, because...yada, yada, yada.

 

 

 

ON DEATH

 

Sometimes I'll be having one of those days where I feel like I can run a marathon-hell, two or three in a row. Then I'll think, 'But maybe that's just Nature's way of preparing me for a merciful slaughter.' Well, so much for yet another attempt to transcend a keenly disturbing awareness of one's own ever-immanent mortality. But hey, it has its benefits, too, I suppose. Being aware of encroaching death, that is. For one, it keeps us grounded, that's for sure. For another, it motivates us to use our time & talents wisely-well, for some of us it does.

 

The funny thing is, even when I was at the age where I was supposedly supposed to believe myself to be invincible, I was still, very much in touch with a sense of my mortality. I am not a creature of delusion or illusion, but one of realism & reckoning I guess. I did a couple of those “Personality Type” indicators over the years, & “tough-mindedness” was in the list of traits akin to those of my “kind.” Yet I say, if it comes naturally to me, I don't deserve that much credit for it, right? But...maybe I do, just a little bit. This particular “trait” has definitely been more of a blessing than a curse, that is for sure. Unlike another trait which those of my “type” usually possess, namely, an “eidetic” memory. The problem with an eidetic, a.k.a. “photographic” memory is that, on the upside, you can remember almost anything. On the downside, you remember EVERYTHING! (Not coincidentally I don't think, we are diagnosed with anxiety-related conditions, namely PTSD more than the rest of the population).

 

Although it is not mere overcompensation to recognize nervous disorders as a sign not of imbalance or lack of constitution, but on the contrary, as indicative of superior intelligence & evolutionary capacity. Although, it is also true that the more “evolved” one becomes, the more vulnerable one becomes in the sense of the existential (& often vocational & social) displacement which one feels being a member of a smaller “higher-minded” minority. But everyone feels, in their own way, a member of some “smaller minority”. The truth is, we are all “lonely” in each our own ways. But, we are not alone in this, our irredeemable sense of solipsistic languishing.

 

But Life is beautifully rife with Paradox! We must celebrate it! Revel in it! Work with it, not against it! After all, what we deem “paradox” is the harmonious & optimal integration & unity behind all things manifesting itself for our own psycho-spiritual edification. Contrasts would not be recognized were they facsimiles, would they? Nevertheless, back to the topic of each our own imminent mortality. This, too, can be viewed as the paradoxical “other half” of what we call “life.” But I think that's too reductionist & doesn't really help us to understand either death or life & come to terms with either of them any better.

 

Of course, we possess the technical “medical” terminology to explain (at least on a strictly “biological” level anyhow) both the process of “life” & the process of “death” or “dying”. But again, has this ever really helped anyone to truly come to terms (no pun intended)? No, of course not, because a human person is not just a mere “cadaver”, but is a “soul” as well. No matter what one believes or does not believe when it comes to the “metaphysical” issues of this life, the fact remains self-evident, human individuals are complex, & highly vulnerable beings! Our needs run way deeper than typical Q & A type interactions when it comes to that of our own innermost life & experiences.

 

It is true that when I am at the Doctor's office getting my annual check-up, I often prefer to have a more “clinical” type interaction, in the sense that I don't want it to get too intimate on an emotional or psychological level with someone that I do not know very well. I also enjoy learning the technical terminology for things as well, so clinicians don't need to “dumb” things down down for this “patient.” I want all of the gory details! However, I have also not yet had a “terminal” type of diagnosis presented to me in such a situation.

 

I know myself well enough to be able to project myself into an imaginary situation similar to that, but won't actually know how I will react & what my needs will be until the day comes, most likely. As Russian filmmaker Andrei Tarkovsky once shared, “Death doesn't exist for me, really. But I suppose I will feel differently once it's actually here.” Exactly. No amount of philosophizing or imagining can truly prepare us for the “real thing”. Thus, why go on with this here little ditty?

 

We are all gonna die someday, & we know not when. I suppose the art of living is mastered in the balancing of form & function, colour & light, the will to create & a surrender to the soul-smithing which our Heavenly Father & Creator is masterfully crafting within each & every one of us. Whether we are living to die, or dying to live, or just plain making the most of it all, Life is a precious darn gift. And I am so grateful for it. Period.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

HE MEETS US WHERE WE’RE AT!

 

Colossians 3:12-14

“Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy & dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness & patience. Bear with each other & forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues, put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.”

 

As I have made my way through this perilous world, somewhere along the way my sense of self became damaged by some of the erroneous & harmful ideas disseminated by the culture. One of the main ways that I was damaged in my sense of self, was in how in many different ways, some subtle, others more blatant, I was given the message that being the way that I was was either not good enough, not worthy, or just not welcome. According the Myers-Briggs Personality Inventory, I am mostly identified with the INTJ classification. This means that I am an Intuitive Thinker, with a depth of feeling & keenness of discernment. I am also a very conscientious, broad-minded, & highly creative individual.

 

Apparently, my “type” is not only rare, but is also one of the types least acknowledged by this world, & coincidentally, the least existentially actualized & fulfilled. Although this is definitely through no fault of our own, as another salient feature of INTJ's is that we have strong desire & need to continue growing & learning as people, so that we can help others & be the best we can be. We are the type that often steps outside of our comfort zone, as we possess a genuine & profound love for soul expansion.

 

We are also very selective & usually reserved when it comes to our social interactions & the people that we let into our lives. This is often shamed, & misunderstood by this current milieu as either being snobbery and/or anti-social tendencies, but we just have very healthy & strong boundaries, because we understand the harm that can come out of not exercising good boundaries, both with ourselves & with others. Another way that this feature of our personality is wrongly labelled, is as being some sort of social ineptitude or 'shyness.' In truth, we are often circumspect & discerning, but rarely 'shy,' being as mature-minded as we often are.

 

Although, I have to admit that we are a 'type' that is very awkward when it comes to more superficial social interactions. But this is not, as it is often shamed, a quality of inferiority. On the contrary, we are often the type that others refer to as one of the most congruent, or authentic & deep. And some of the rigours of sociability in Western-especially modern, Western society are exhausting for us, & we just desire to use our time on this earth wisely & not waste it on things that ultimately do not promote & nurture that of our own growth in a healthy, positive direction.

 

Nevertheless, every 'type' gets misunderstood in some way, & shamed for being the way that they are in this world. I just wanted to give a brief segue into the purpose of this article/essay. The message that I wish to share with those who are reading this is: You are perfect exactly the way that you are, and that God can meet you wherever & whoever you are. Now, of course I don't mean that we should never grow or learn, or allow the Lord to 'prune our branches', & weed out some of our more sinister and pathological qualities. I just mean it in the sense that there isn't just one way to serve the Lord, & there isn't just one 'personality type' who is equipped and called to serve the Lord.

 

His creation is magnificently & awesomely diverse! And so are we as individuals! What you have to offer is uniquely yours, just as what I or anyone else has to offer are uniquely mine & theirs. For example, I am often plagued with a feeling of inadequacy because I am not an 'evangelist' or a servant of God in the conventional sense of being a Lead Pastor of a church or even a deacon or some other such Public Figure. And I often feel like I am not a 'good enough' servant of the Lord, because the culture & society in which I live exalts a very specific image of what an 'ideal' servant of the Lord acts like, walks like, talks like, and just is like. Many of us who are more systematic & meticulous about our approach, especially in regards to matters which we know are of utmost gravity & seriousness, such as spreading the Light & Hope of the Gospel to people through our ministrations, just do not fit into the 'Type A' extroverted model of what a spiritual 'leader' should be.

 

But the Lord God created & molded me into the person that I am proud to say I am today. And no one should allow, if they are called, anyone to discourage them in their own individual nuances of godly service. The main way that I minister to my fellow human beings is not only through living, to the best of my ability, by the commandments set forth by God to love & serve God with all of my heart, body, mind & soul, but also to love others & to treat them with the same dignity & respect that I wish to be treated with. It's really very simple when you think of it. And I also use my linguistic & other intellectual abilities in service to Him & others who need enlightening, uplifting, comforting, & empowerment.

 

Now, I cannot accomplish these things when I am living in my flesh instead of walking by the Spirit. But I can when I pray without ceasing throughout my day to remain connected to the voice of the Lord & how He wants to live through me, & then follow that up with a full submission to Him & a total faith & trust in Him, placing Him as the Lord over my body, my mind, my soul, my talents, my time & in general, my life. But, like everyone else, I am a work in progress.

 

But thankfully, the Lord looks at the heart-the inner man. And when He sees us meeting Him in the middle, He blesses us. We must just persevere & go wherever He leads us, not matter what our natural temperaments, personalities, or capacities might be. It breaks my heart-and certainly also the Lord God's-to see so many people discouraged & shamed into non-being, merely because of the works of the Evil One to use the culture to make people feel inadequate or somehow unwanted merely for being the wonderful, beautiful way that they were created to be. If you minister & serve the Lord by writing poetry, do it unto the Lord with all of your Being!

 

If you are a Pastor of a church, do it unto the Lord with all of your Being! If you are a Barista at a coffee-shop, serve the Lord there & do it with all of your Being! There is no one path that we have to take in order to serve Him & to fulfill His purpose & perfect plan here upon this earth. He can do all things for those who are willing! He meets us where we're at!

 

When I was younger, I, too, was plagued by all of these questions: Which University should I attend? Which church should I attend? Which job should I take? What vocation should I devote my life to? And it worried me that maybe, when I had finally made a decision, this wasn't where the Lord wanted me to go & perhaps I had taken the wrong path. Now, He has blessed me with the perspective that comes with experience, & I know that the where, when, what, & how are not important. It's the why. Why did I choose this particular job, or this particular church, etc.? If my motives are anything by completely submitted to pleasing & serving His purpose for my life, then, and onlythen, am I amiss.

 

There are an infinitude of paths that any one individual can take. Do not let the Evil One hang you up on particulars. Take the first step in Faith & godly pursuit, & He will lead you! Most of us do not live the glamorous lives as depicted on television & in 'celebrity culture'. But guess what? Neither do they! Being an 'ordinary' vessel of the Lord Jesus is, for me, truly the highest honour, for He is the only being worthy of all praise & glory. That is not to say, that being a mere mortal vessel of Almighty God makes anyone dull, or lacking in talent, or brilliance. Everyone is gifted by our Creator & Heavenly Father with something that makes us all shine, & makes us all “fearfully & wonderfully made.” (Psalm 139:14) It just means that we acknowledge as His Word reminds us that, “In Him we move & have our being. (Acts 17:28).”

 

Furthermore, it acknowledges that, in a very literal sense of the term, He is our Creator & our Sustainer. We do not take any breath upon this earth without His express consent! He truly is Lord over all, & we are nothing without Him! All that I have ever managed to accomplish on this earth is only because of the magnificent Spirit of Christ at work through me & in me! I could not even be writing this essay without His power & life flowing through my veins! Indeed, even when we are servile to the darker aspects of this human condition, & choose to do evil over good, it is still He who protects us from total ruin, & chastises us afterward to draw us back to Him. (Revelation 3:19 “Those whom I love I rebuke & discipline.”)

 

No mind or heart can conceive of His love & care for us with every step we take, & every breath that we take. And no mind nor heart can conceive what He has in store for those who love, revere & glorify Him! (1 Corinthians 2:9) And although it is process, & everyone begins imperfectly formed, spiritually speaking, we can have faith that He will complete His work in us as long as we submit in total dependence to His works within our innermost beings, & lives (Philippians 1:6). God does not show favourtism to either 'Introvert' or 'Extrovert.' He values & loves all of us equally & expects us to devote our time, our talents, & ourselves to Him, & Him alone. We will stray, but He will never allow us to walk down that dark path for too long before reminding us to Whom we belong, and before reminding us that the Evil One always works the hardest to dim the lights of those who shine with His Truth, Light & Love.

 

 

“For Thou hast made us for Thyself, & our hearts are restless 'til they find their rest in Thee.”

-St. Augustine

Colossians 3:17

“And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him.”

P.S. And remember, dear ones, do not mistake a lack of worldly recognition for a lack of worth or value. On the contrary, if you feel a constant sense of existential nullity as it relates this world, you are probably on the right path! And there is nothing wrong with being an outcasted, mocked & spurned treasure-storer in Heaven. Amen!

 

 

Philippians 1:6

“...Being confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it onto completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”

Colossians 3:1-4

“Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. Set your mind on things above, not on earthly things. For you have died, & your life is now hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you will also appear with Him in glory.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

EROS & THANATOS, I THEE WED

Disclaimer: Prepare for some sanguine ribaldry in this next installment.

You are hereby cordially invited to attend the ceremonial union of Eros & Thanatos. Heavy refreshments & aperitifs will be served. Bacchanalian revelry of every variation also encouraged.

 

Eros & Thanatos are evidently, kissing cousins that want very much to wed & bed. Have you ever noticed that you get really horny at funerals, not even including those persons with necrophilial impulses? (Ha ha-just kidding about the necrophilia-that is an activity definitely not advised-not that I know from personal experience). And weddings, incidentally (Oh, nevermind-tautology-these two things are the same) seem to have a similar effect. I suppose the obvious explanation is that, when an awareness of our own ever-impending mortality is introduced, what could be a better diversionary mindly tactic than enlivening ourselves in other ways, right?

 

Yes, that primal terror of one's own ever-immanent (and EMINENT) annihilation rearing its cantankerous head again. And, although some of us have always, no matter what age we have been, experienced this. Yet it does seem to intensify its efforts of thought-intrusion with each passing year granted to us on this earth. Logically, it makes sense that the older we get, the nearer we get to our own death (although we also realize that we could go at any time). Yet, those are only a few surface interpretations of the matter.

 

Nevertheless, the sex response & the death response seem to be intractably intertwined. There is also, of course, the instinct to leave something meaningful & concrete behind, such as progeny. Although in truth, our progeny aren't carbon copies of us to 'carry on our legacy' but are very much each their own individuals, and we should respect that. Yet on the whole, with all of these glorious juxtapositions & paradoxes regularly presenting themselves to our human consciousness, we have many opportunities for discourse & intercourse. Indeed for some of us, the intellectual can be quite sexually arousing. I believe the term for this is 'sapiosexuality'. Ideational foreplay can lube my mechanism more so than any pornographic images presented either externally and/or internally. And thankfully, my 'progeny' begin and end with my artistic & intellectual creations.

 

No, really. This is the legacy which I desire to 'leave behind'. It is my 'immortality project.' It means more to me & brings me more pure joy & existential satisfaction than anything on this earth. In fact, whenever I am asked (which is very rare, but does sometimes happen) what I am working on, if the work is not finished I will reply: “It's in the gestational phase.” Or I say to myself: “I'm gonna let this one gestate for a while before putting anything 'on the page'.” Works of Art, including Literature can often 'live on' in even deeper & more profound ways than that 'progeny' bore in the more traditional sense. Because the latter 'progeny' have the freedom of will to not leave much of a mark in this world & the world(s) to come if they so choose. But once Art is disseminated 'out there' & 'into' the collective (& private) consciousness, it's pretty much out of our hands to retract it.

 

I am reminded of the old playground lullaby, “Sticks & stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” We all pretty much have it figured out by a tender age how untrue this is. Words definitely are very powerful & can hurt us. Of course, the Artist's good intentions might get merely misread by the 'viewer', yet we all must still be conscientious of our phrasing when we are attempting to share our works with the world at large. Indeed, I often think that words are more powerful than anything else on God's green earth. After all, as Judeo-Christian Scripture quoth: “In the beginning was the Word.” But even if you don't follow the belief that the Scriptures are the inerrant 'Word of God', you can still see the impact which words can have upon the human psyche & therefore upon the engineering & evolution of human society at large.

 

Nevertheless, getting back to the subject of Eros & Thanatos & their likely pairing, we can also experience this phenomenon whenever we are feeling melancholic, or even suicidal. Again, I think the most likely explanation is the tug 'o war between 'oppositional' forces such as Life & Death. The sexual arousal is perhaps caused by the 'heat' produced by the 'friction' which the Soul experiences in the face of Life's attendant anxieties. After all, we humans are complex, highly sentient, & therefore vulnerable beings. Yet this is also what distinguishes us & crowns our heads in glory & honour. We just must make sure that we don't let these crowns weigh too heavily upon our fragile frames, lest we feel it necessary to abdicate from our throne.

 

I believe the purpose of this human experience & life to be that of positive growth towards higher ideals & the actualization of our inherent skills & talents. Mind you, we have a very limited time on this earth, so we can't expect ourselves to fulfill all of our hopes & dreams while we are still here, but we can fulfill at least some of them. In fact, I believe it to be a win-win situation both for ourselves & for others when we assume accountability for our own lives. This is why a certain amount of 'self-centeredness' is not only essential, but should be more encouraged in our society. We can only be as happy as the life we have chosen to lead; and we can only reliably share this health & happiness with others when it has been achieved authentically. This, I suppose, is an inside-out kind of approach-mind you, I realize, not easily achieved for some than for others.

 

Nevertheless, to summarize: Individuals with more 'Introverted' proclivities should work on honing more of our 'Extroverted' skills so that we can better serve not only ourselves but others. And those people who are more inherently 'Extroverted' in nature can benefit from developing some more 'Introverted' capacities such as self-awareness, etc. 'Cause in the land of Eros & Thanatos, all's fair in Sex & Death. Now, time to sign off here & go get ready for that funeral...Wedding? Funeral. Wedding?...

 

REMAINING IN THE VINE

 

 

Oftentimes, for the vagabond human heart, taking root somewhere wholesome can be one of the most challenging tasks of our existence. And I refer not necessarily to geo-spatial locality, but rather, to one of a more existential, philosophical nature. Moreover, one of the most arduous, & yet, rewarding endeavours of our Judeo-Christian faith is what Jesus referred to in John 15, verses 1-4 as “remaining in the vine.” As we have all at one time or another noticed, opening our hearts to Christ & even surrendering our will to the will of the Father is difficult, but not nearly as difficult, we soon find out, as remaining submitted to His will & His will alone.

 

Yet we are also reassured that, as long as we genuinely repent & go & “sin no more”: “No one who lives in Him keeps on sinning. No one who keeps on sinning has either seen Him nor known Him.” (1 John 3:6) However, since no one can always keep this promise to resist sin in every possible way, the Word in Romans 6:12 tells us that it is perhaps healthier & ultimately better for our salvation to focus on not letting “sin reign in our mortal body.” We will sin. This is an intractable aspect of our fallen human nature: “For surely I was sinful from the time my mother conceived me.” (Psalms 51:5) Yet the key is to quickly apply the atoning ash of self-examination & repentance to our sinful words, thoughts, & deeds so that we can prevent ourselves from further, & more deleteriously, being deceived by the “powers of this dark world & the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.” (Ephesians 6:12)

 

And, on a more ecumenical & colloquial note, as Franklin Delano Roosevelt once keenly observed: “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.” And to this the Scripture also offers precedent & solace: “For God has not given us the spirit of fear, but of power, & of love & of a sound mind.” (2 Timothy 1:7) We indeed can, (& are expected), to submit to a daily discipline of reverence before & praise of God for His providence & grace, through honest self-reflection &, when necessary, repentance of our sins. But, after weighing both the pros & the cons of such a trying task, what a joyous & strengthening thing it is to know that God's mercy never fails; that God's mercy shall never cease for those who love Him & continue to seek Him.

 

FIDES ANTE INTELLECTUM

It is oftentimes easier to believe in the devil than it is to believe in God. For such a thing is so easy to fall prey to when the sentient organs of mortal human experience, by Truth's indiscriminate hand, are dealt the first blows of the profane. Yet without first, recognition of Tragedy, even Comedy turns tragic and then there would be no evident or immediate cause for redeeming ourselves.

 

But perhaps Tragedy is overrated and we do not need it as much as we think that we do. Perhaps the true Tragedy is in how we continually seem to compulsively create something out of what is essentially, nothing of true substance or import.

 

But now, once the acknowledgment has been made, how exactly do we let go of it all in order to better our species? For as anyone beyond a certain age of cognizance is all too sentiently made aware, nothing can truly be held onto or even let go of for long in this life of transience. And the very act of surrender requires an inscience of self-sense which we do not even naturally possess and that probably would not be in our best interests to coddle anyway.

 

In continuum, perhaps however it is within human nature to still wonder if it is necessary for life to be so consumed and potentially jeopardized by this existential juggling act which we must perform with such exactitude every day.

 

Yet this is where the Metaphysical comes into play: the matter behind Mind vs. Matter, Good vs. Evil, the Material vs. the Intangible, the Intellectual vs. the Intuitive, and, last but certainly no least, the Self vs. Others.

 

Although many believe these struggles to be the very meaning of this human life journey itself. And this philosophy indeed does not betray legitimacy, as more than half of a human life is expended upon the pursuit of some higher knowledge as to how this life can best be lived.

 

And indeed, perhaps it would not be hyperbole to state that every moment of human consciousness is wrought with the weight of choice. For no matter how seemingly large or small, the energy expended for the seeming mundane minutiae of this life seems to interfere with the full actualization of our higher selves and faculties.

 

In finale, I suppose the philosophical theme of Survival vs. Thrivance will always play itself out no matter how we may attempt to ignore it. Yet it cannot be wholly denied, that no matter how much we attempt to attribute a factor of nihility to each our own existences or fates, we all nevertheless feel a pull towards something far from arbitrary, nor worthy of our feigned Apathy or Indifference.

 

For every organism throughout Nature possesses an undying instinctual drive towards the pursuit of Life over Death, or Production over Destruction. And no matter how melancholic or even ambivalent we may feel, there is always a faint murmur of Exultation and Life-Force felt within us, striving to potentiate itself.

 

And even in those moments of human extreme, such as with suicidal ideation or inclination, there is never a true desire for Death, but rather, a fear of facing Life and what this might further exact from us beyond what we, in these moments, already feel we have had stolen from us or has been ravaged within us.

 

And indeed, whatever we choose to call this invisible yet dynamic force guiding us all towards our transcendence or our demise, we all feel and sense it. We all sense that there must be a greater purpose to our existence, and not merely because it is comforting to think so. As a matter of discourse, I personally find it much more trying to believe in a God or a Higher Power behind all things.

 

Life is in truth not so much easier to adopt an atheistic or completely indifferent attitude towards all things as many deistic skeptics may believe. Life is actually not only more challenging to believe in things like a God who I must honour and revere in word, action and even intent, but it is also much more complicated as such.

 

Nevertheless, I have always believed such concepts to be inherent within humankind anyway. To clarify, even the self-professed atheist cannot truly and fully disbelief in higher spiritual realities because I believe these things are a part of our very design. I suppose this is in tandem with St. Augustine's ontological argument for the existence of a higher spiritual being.

But in closing, is not humankind's ability to imagine and to conceptualize the very foundation upon which all of our greatest achievements are solidly built? And if we could continue working to synthesize the Metaphysical with the so-called Practical, or rather, the Platonian weltanschauung with the Aristotelian one, there is no telling what we might achieve.

 

ON MORALITY & RELATIVISM

Contrary to popular opinion, there is no relativism in morality. In fact, the very essence of what makes 'relativism', relativism & 'morality', morality, reeks of mutual exclusivity, from both a purely logistic as well as an orthopraxic standpoint. Reality may be relative, or at least the perception thereof, but Truth is absolute & immutable. What we call 'reality' deals mainly with the basic physical senses & the phenomena which arise out of our experience of these, often in combination with our psychological state.

 

Truth, however, transcends these 'fleshly' phenomena altogether, although it can be enhanced by them, at least during a direct experience of higher revelation and those deeper insights which can be arrived upon during states of mystical contemplation. Seeing as Truth concerns matters more 'otherworldly' or 'metaphysical', if you will, some may argue that perhaps we cannot definitively declare Truth, or any mortal human experience, as 'absolute', due to the limitations inherent within our species & in our intellective capacities. Fair enough. However, one could also counter that argument with an equally valid statement such as: “Yes, but, despite the limitations of the 'perceiver', there is also no way to disprove the workings of a power & force of mind which is perhaps enabling a mortal human to escape those bounds, at least within a finite period of time.”

 

Thus, there we have it again. That old paradox. Yet even within certain scientific & academic circles there is a credo to, at least, partially ameliorate this cognitive dissonance: “Absence of evidence does not mean evidence of absence.” Nevertheless, let us continue on with our dissection of 'Reality', which is indeed, often subjective & relative to the 'perceiver', and 'Truth', which is presumed to be absolute & immutable. One simplified way of putting it would be: “The perception of 'reality' is processed by the eye, the ear, the nose, etc, & overall, the brain or our 'neuro-apparati', and 'truth' is processed by the 'soul', or the 'spirit'.

 

Yet many believe that the 'brain' (and some the 'heart') is the seat of the soul/spirit, so this breakdown may not work for them. Thus, another way of describing the experience of 'reality' versus the experience of 'truth' could be: Reality is how we make sense of the mundane world in which we live. Truth is how we make sense of the more profound mysteries & psycho-spiritual struggles of this life and of our human condition. Yet, no matter how we dichotomize these things with mere words & sentences, morality & relativism, which are the subject of this essay, indeed are complementary, and yet still mutually exclusive. They are mutually exclusive at least in the sense of their form & function, but not perhaps, in their complementary co-existence or in the bipartite unity inherent within the human mortal.

 

Our perception of 'reality' can either aid or impede our ability to discern 'truth', for example. (Although when discerning truth, we will be able to maintain & perhaps even experience a refinement of our clarity as it relates to 'reality'. Indeed, if one experiences a distortion of perceptual experience of 'reality', one is most likely not truly in touch with 'truth', but merely just an unfamiliar variant of 'reality', whose novelty & intensity may be mimicking a transcendental or mystical phenomenon.)

 

Furthermore, there is the age old dispute amongst laymen & epistemologists alike: What are the varying 'types' of perceptual/cognitive experience and/or 'knowledge'? Where does our 'knowledge' come from in regards to each of these 'types'? Are there limitations to what we can know or claim to know? And the list goes on. Some may again claim the relativity inherent in each individual person's answers & beliefs on these particular inquiries. And often, that will prove to be somewhat true. Yet the boundary will eventually be crossed from 'relativity', over into 'absolutism'. It's gonna happen. Ya can't stop it, folks. Such a thing as 'Absolute Truth' does exist.

 

I believe that truth is found mostly within the realms of Mysticism & Morality. I do, however, appreciate & understand the revulsion which some feel in the presence of any kind of Aristotelian-Exclusion-Of-The-Middle, either-or kind of thinking. I have the same initial reaction. Yet the truth remains, that there is such a thing as phenomena which does not contain within it, a 'right' or a 'wrong', at least as it relates to interactions between sentient beings & the environs in which they must both survive & thrive.

 

In a word, what I'm saying is: We all possess an inherent moral cognition or a knowledge of right & wrong, and indeed of all attending oppositionally constructive/destructive forces at work within ourselves & the world around us. In Judeo-Christian scripture, these forces are referred to as “unseen principalities.” Despite our seemingly keen ability to 'rationalize' our 'sins' into gentler, more spiritually sound (or even just benign) entities of intention & effect, they still have a destructive effect nevertheless. Confusion of intention & effect seems to be a tool which we often use to weasel our way out of the truth in many cases. But, as the saying goes: Right is right, and wrong is wrong. No matter which way we try to spin it. I believe the branch of thought which touts 'situational ethics' as an acceptable way to approach moralistic issues to be fallacious. There is a difference again inherent in these two realms of thought.

 

Ethics deals mainly with the world, or, with more ecumenical matters at hand. Morality concerns itself mainly with the 'afterworld', and with more 'extra-mundane' matters. (Although, to be precise, both realms do often intersect & complement one another in their missions & tasks.) I am mainly addressing the problem of an over-extension which seems to plague humanity, of a claim to 'relativity' in service to depravity & evil. In other words, in order for me (or anyone) to be able to rightfully claim something as being 'relative' either to the culture in which I live, or any other extenuating factor, it must, indeed, be found to qualify for such a distinction! Because, not all things are relative!

 

To use an example: Killing a human person in self-defense, or in defense of someone else. I personally believe this to be morally justifiable. I should respect & honour that of my own value-of-life just as much as I respect & honour another's. Now, mind you, I do not believe that this is 'right', morally speaking, just that it is justifiable. Hence, we have been led into another area of 'legalistic' (and semantic) distinctions & classifications. But when we are having a hearty & open discussion about things, this will happen. If our inquiry is answered quickly, without leading us into at least one more question, then we may not truly be onto anything.

 

On the whole, we can presume that each individual has the moral right to choose whichever path they need to take in their journey towards Truth, but one thing is both universal & absolute: Those actions taken upon self & 'other' which cause harm, & those actions taken upon self and 'other' which cause healing. Whichever one we choose to contribute to, does indeed, have a very real effect upon ourselves, others, and the world at large in which we live. This, we can be absolutely sure of.

 

ON TRANSGRESSION & FORGIVENESS

Excusing an offense without holding the offending party accountable is merely enabling them to go on sinning. Repentance is a part of any sound relational equation.-V.L.S.

Matthew 5:22 King James Version (KJV)

22 But I say unto you, That whosoever is angry with his brother WITHOUT A CAUSE shall be in danger of the judgment...

"If your brother sins against you, rebuke him; and IF HE REPENTS, forgive him. And if he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times in a day returns to you saying, "I repent", you shall forgive him" -Luke 17:3-4

James 5:16

“Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.”

We can all identify with the feeling of indignation that comes along with having been usurped in some way by a fellow human being. And Western society, especially, has a lot to say about how we are supposed to act & feel in these situations. One misconception which we all, I'm sure in some way, been indoctrinated with, is that getting angry at someone else is bad. We shouldn't feel it, & we most certainly are expected to not express it. Yet there are as many variations of this emotion as there are of all of the emotions attendant to the human condition & experience. And one 'shade', if you will, of anger that we have been unfortunately discouraged from owning within ourselves & feeling, is righteous indignation.

 

The Judeo-Christian Scripture, for one, shows precedent for allowing such feelings towards our fellow humankind when evil has been enacted upon us and/or those we love & care about. We have not only a right to set boundaries up to those who have ill-intent towards us, but we must set those boundaries if we are to prevent ourselves from falling into the ways of evil ourselves. One Scripture, in particular that I will use as a referential point in this brief essay is found in Psalm 101. The first verse is taken from Psalm 101:3-4: “I will set before my eyes, no vile thing. The deeds of faithless men I hate; they will not cling to me. Men of perverse heart shall be far from me; I will nothing to do with evil.” If that doesn't speak for itself, I don't know what does!

 

I often think to myself: “Being a Christian does not mean being an enabler of wickedness, or being a doormat!” It most certainly does not. We are also told by Scripture to “expose the deeds of darkness”. And one very effective way that we can do this is in erecting a foundation of self-respect, so that when we are abused by our fellow humankind, we can stand firm in our disallowance of it. Hating wickedness & injustice is not necessarily equivalent with hating “the perpetrator” him and/or herself. Yet, in all honesty, we must, at least until such time as the danger which they pose has passed, allow for a strong enough dislike or or even contempt of these persons so we can protect ourselves properly from their depraved influences over our spirit & our minds.

 

Furthermore, getting back to Psalm 101, there is precedent found in verses 6-8 as well, for the kind of self-protection of which I speak. The verses read thus: “My eyes will be on the faithful in the land, that they may dwell with me; he whose walk is blameless will minister to me. No one who practices deceit will dwell in my house; no one who speaks falsely will stand in my presence. Every morning I will put to silence all the wicked in the land; I will cut off every evildoer from the city of the Lord.” Personally, for me, I am careful to interpret these verses symbolically rather than literally. For example, “my house” could also refer to one's own 'inward dwelling of mind & spirit', as being in need of protection against unsavory, outward influences. Also “the city of the Lord” could also be interpreted as one's innermost being standing firm in righteousness so that the “evildoers” cannot penetrate it.

 

As we can plainly see, our Lord & Saviour most definitely wants us to set up good fences with our fellow humankind, so that we can operate to the fullest efficiency & safety within the bounds of human society at large. And sometimes, this entails the regulation of “the borders”, if you will, so that we ourselves do not fall into the ways of evildoing & wickedness. Yeah, but isn't that “segregation” & being unforgiving? some may wonder. Yet, there are many instances in Scripture, including those to be found in Psalm 101 which I have included in this brief essay, that not only acknowledge the necessity for this sometimes, but in fact, advise us to practice on a daily basis so that we can keep our discernment between those individuals who are truly “blameless”, & thus possessive of good intent towards us when they “minister to us”, & those who are not.

 

It is thus, a very “Christian” thing to do in taking good care of oneself so that no evil may unduly influence us. It is not about being “hateful”, “stuck-up/elitist”, or “hypocritical”, to not allow ourselves to be abused and/or exploited (whether financially, emotionally, or in some other way) by our fellow human beings. It is about staying on the right path, & making sure that we are empowered from within ourselves to do so by treating ourselves with respect & consideration as regards our own feelings, inward states, & the actualization of our inward talents & skills out in the world. In order to be able to do all of these things, we must nurture ourselves, & protect ourselves from those darker principalities which seek nothing but that of our own enslavement & destruction. Allowing for this kind of kowtowing, does not do anyone any good.

 

Moreover, another issue that I feel needs to be elucidated upon (for my own edification as well), is that of “forgiveness.” Yes, the original “F-Word”. First off, I will start out by saying that this is largely the Lord's purview. Secondly, that such an event “takes two to tango”, so to speak. Let me elaborate. I say that forgiveness is largely in the Lord's purview, as He is the only Being to whom anyone must answer (myself included) in the end. Furthermore, He is also the only infallible being who can see things with absolute clarity. Also, it is through the power & grace of the Holy Spirit that my own merely mortal inclination & spiritual skill-set can rise to such a grande gesture as the offering of Absolution for another's transgressions and/or sins.

 

After all the Scripture says that each one must bear their own burdens. Quite frankly, in and of myself & my own limited, spiritually-feeble human ability, I am just not qualified for that. It's not about an insolent unwillingness to offer forgiveness to someone actively & sincerely seeking it. On the contrary,I feel humbled by the realization that perhaps they should ask God our Father for forgiveness, as I might fall short on my end and therefore do not wish to cause any more damage than has already been done. I just personally don't feel that it is my place to wield that kind of power over another human being, & in fact, I would probably tell them that they shouldn't be offering me that kind of power over them. Furthermore, the Scripture says that we must CONFESS or REPENT to the Lord and to others when appropriated, in order to be healed and to find absolution. It says, in a word, to CONFESS and be healed-not DEFLECT and be healed!

 

Nevertheless, all personal idiosyncrasies aside, let's examine what is required for a successful “atonement” between Violator & Violated. What a lot of people don't realize & automatically judge as “harboring a grudge” or as “being unforgiving” is that: The guilty party must first ask for forgiveness to begin with! And, more specifically, this person must be sensed as being sincere to the potentially forgiving party. Yet, even with that part fulfilled, it ain't over yet. The “offender” must also actively seek to not commit the same violation (physical and/or emotional/psychological) upon the “offended” again. In fact, this is a key element required for the completion of any act of contrition/repentance-namely, that we “go & sin no more.” Why not direct all of the energy used to give a lengthy apology into instead self-reflecting & focusing on not doing the same thing again? I've often thought to myself: “Don't say you're sorry, just don't DO IT AGAIN!” That to me, is a truer & more trustworthy sign of atonement. Even the Scripture bears precedent about this being a two-way street. Scripture even makes an allowance, in the event that our offender is unwilling to make amends with us, to go our separate way & to move on the best that we can.

 

In finale, Romans reminds us that “all have sinned & fallen short the glory of God.” But this does not preclude each person's right to choose what elements to let in & what elements to keep out of themselves & their homes & their lives. It's not always about “passing judgment on other people”, but is often merely about “securing the perimeters for oneself” so that one properly govern oneself & take accountability for oneself, as we are instructed to do by our Father in Heaven. As G.K. Chesterton once put it: “Good fences make for good neighbours.” And these “fences” exist both from without & from within the minds & hearts of each individual person. In fact, “good”, and conscientious Christians are mindful about not only how they treat others, but of how they allow or don't allow themselves to be treated by others. In a word, if I don't first respect myself, how in the world will I ever be able to teach myself how to respect & to love others? It all starts at home, indeed.

 

Fundamentally, we are all created equal by Our Father in Heaven, and seen as equal in His eyes. “For God does not show favourtism.” Yet we each are also required, as He would not violate the sanctity of our freedom of choice, to willingly submit and to prostrate ourselves before Him, and before those whom we may have wronged when we seek absolution. As some Christians are fond of putting it: “It's about what's in our hearts that the Lord sees & cares about.” We just must be careful not give sway to “popular” opinion regarding our own feelings when we have been transgressed by another and/or others, & allow ourselves to disown those negative emotions or to feel ashamed or unworthy of them. All this does, is give power to the destructive forces that are at play within the transgressor and the situation at large. It is perfectly okay to feel angry, or indignant when you have been unjustly maimed in some way. It, like all things, is about what we do with our feelings & thoughts which determines whether they end up doing harm or good from within ourselves and then, out in the world.

 

But, we have to feel to deal, and we have to deal, in order that we may finally, heal. But yes, it is also okay, should someone who has hurt you come to you, sincerely asking for your forgiveness, to grant it to them under your own conditions. In my eyes, no matter how deeply another's transgression may have wounded me, an act of genuine contrition on their end is worth a whole lot more in the long run. And often the hardest and trickiest part often comes down to forgiving ourselves first, when we have erred or hurt someone else. But, we all must earn that part, just as we also must re-earn another's trust whenever we have trespassed against them. And we also have a right to expect others who have trespassed against us to earn their keep as well. This makes for good human relations, all around.

Summary:

I'll say it again: Erecting a boundary against abuse (overt or covert) is NOT the same thing as 'holding a grudge' against someone. Nevertheless, the Scripture ACTUALLY says, "He who is angry at his brother WITHOUT A CAUSE is in danger of judgment." (Matthew 5:22) Furthermore, the Scripture also says, "If your brother sins against you, rebuke him, IF HE REPENTS, forgive him..."

(Luke 17:3) We are instructed throughout Scripture to hold one another accountable if we truly care about creating a godly and just society in which everyone can thrive and do His bidding in the world.

 

THE TRUE ENEMY

“Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armour of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes.”

-Ephesians 6:10-11

Sometimes the Evil One will plant others in our path to afflict us. Yet we also have to be careful that we are not merely taking what this someone else is saying &/or doing the wrong way. Sometimes we invent enemies in our own heads to defeat, mainly because that is what we are used to-fighting & 'surviving' others. I suppose in part, we also do this because it gives us some semblance of familiarity, and hence, control over our lives & those 'dark principalities' which conspire against us at seemingly every impasse-and of course, a sense of control over that of our own mortality-ever immanent.

 

Then again, sometimes we are correct about someone's ill &/or false intentions towards us, & we are merely utilizing our God-given 'interpersonal radar' to protect ourselves. It is hard to tell the difference sometimes. This is, I suppose, for those such as myself, one of the byproducts of C-PTSD, I suppose, of being a survivor of systematic childhood emotional abuse. As someone once remarked: “Between the Past & the Present lies many crossed wires!” Nevertheless, the 'damage' is often already done, even if we happen to find out that this 'other' person's intentions weren't what we thought they were.

 

And this failing of my own “Interpersonal Broadcasting System”, however much a 'venial' sin it may indeed be, is still a sin, nonetheless. It is a failing of my fellow human beings which brings me much grief & abiding sorrow. Oftentimes, we hurt others the most due to our own self-protective reflexes &, at least what we perceive in the moment of emotional danger, our assumptions of others' intentions behind why they did what they did &/or said what they said. All that we can each do, of our own accord, is to continue making a sincere effort to continue treating our fellow human beings with the dignity & the respect that we, ourselves, would like to be treated with. Although, for the time being, one may have to erect a healthy boundary to another person that we either perceive has wrongfully transgressed us in some way.

 

I am often tempted at the start of new 'relationships' to give a warning: “I am giving you the benefit of the doubt by letting you in. Please do not make a fool of me & make me regret it. And don't mistake my human decency for an invitation to transgress.” Unfortunately it seems, out of about every 300 people that you meet, you are blessed & fortunate to cross the path of even just one person who has no ulterior motives towards you, & who truly understands & is capable of respecting you. But, let it be. Let it be. That, in my book, is more than enough to make it out of this Life with your Soul, unsold.

 

And as always, a cultivation of self-awareness is our most impenetrable shield against those 'dark principalities' which conspire against all servants & children of God out there in the world merely trying to bring some Light & some Truth to this dark world. Although we must take heed, when wielding this 'Shield of Self-Possession', to not leave that 'Shield of Faith', that 'breastplate of righteousness', that 'belt of truth', that helmet of Salvation & that 'Sword of the Spirit' forged alone through the power of the Holy Writ, at home in the closet (Ephesians 6:10-18). Self-reliance is all good, until we come up against our humanity, & the dysfunctionality of our 'crossed wires' & past wounds.

 

Because truth be told, yes, there are some 'deliberately' (even if perhaps unconsciously) treacherous & mean-spirited people out there, but we must remember that they, too, sometimes act out of their own woundedness-not that this is an 'excuse' for their behaviour, but it can enable us to erect healthy boundaries while also treating those who wish us harm with dignity & sensitivity. And by the way, being 'guarded' is not the same as being callous or cold-hearted. As a matter of fact, healthy boundaries against those who mistreat us serve the main function of preventing our own feet from 'slipping into evil'. As the Scripture so sagely reminds us to: “Guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.”(Proverbs 4:23) To that I would add: “Guard your Mind, for it can become the wellspring of Death.” All priceless treasures must be well-guarded, & well-kept.

 

And truly, Scripture also reminds us: “For our struggle is not against flesh & blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armour of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand." (Ephesians 6:12-13)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

SENTIO ERGO SUM

 

 

It seems that the sacrosanct striving towards an organism's mere self-preservation is that which ultimately may lead to its demise. To parallel this with the Kabbalistic concept of Tikkun Olam, energy cannot remain contained or trapped within a vessel without eventually compromising or completely shattering that vessel. Energy must be expended. It must be left free to pursue its own natural and rightful course. And this especially, includes we as human vessels. For much discourse has been expended beyond its energial good about things such as individual identity and the clinging to thereof. But the truth remains that we can define ourselves according to the possibilities contained within every precious moment of conscious awareness & action/inaction. For this, allows for continued growth & expansion.

 

The older I have gotten, this one truth of the irreducible complexity of personal accountability & its relation to society as a whole, continues to manifest itself to me. We are all fundamentally, down to the core aspects of our humanity and substantiality, one and the same entity merely manifest in myriad imagos of existential mosaic. We are all uniquely designed, but collectively created for the same ultimate purposes. Another truth which continues to stand out to me in starkest contrast to all that most of us have been indoctrinated with, is that we cannot rationalize our way completely through this existence, we must also dream our way through it. Between Mind & Heart, indeed. Yet the two are not mutually exclusive, nor need they be approached this way. Although I suppose this is a part of Nature's continual struggle for balance and fluidity.

 

But perhaps Humankind needs a new kind of revolution-one not so ecumenical in its pursuit, since we seem to be so reluctant to relinquish the obsolescence of the old Cartesian paradigm of strict dualism and reductionism, which admonish us to remain split into two estranged halves-all heedless and needless in actuality. To add a spin to the old Cartesian precis: "I think, therefore I am." perhaps it would be best to rephrase: "Sentio ergo sum." I feel, therefore I am. For not much of true substance and worth is accomplished in this world with the head at the helm and the heart in the stern. For our feelings are the seat of our Souls and our higher potentialities, contrary to prevailing worldly wisdom. Yet placing heart over head is also not the solution but rather, an earnest striving to maintain a healthy balance of expression between the two. And if we can accomplish this but if for even one shining moment or task in any given day, we have achieved a greatness perhaps unlauded by this world, but a greatness in actuality far more meritorious & potentially beneficial to both the Individual and the Collective.

 

CRITICAL THINKING

 

First off, I must apologize in advance for the tone of this first paragraph-at least the first few sentences. I will not however, apologize for the Truths which they seek to illuminate upon. But, here goes. Apparently, some folks in this world seem to mistake 'being critical' for critical THINKING. The ability to make instantly negative & derogatory assumptions about people &/or what they do &/or say & why they do what do and/or say doth not, a circumspect or erudite observer make. In fact, this merely makes them look, at least to a truly discerning & critical thinker, like a complete & utter jackass. And if you've ever noticed, their 'criticisms' are rarely, if ever, even based on accuracy or truth. And this is just another reason why they are annoying, because they're illogical.

 

Mind you, I understand that sometimes, people are just under a lot of stress or just 'having a bad day'. But I refer to those individuals who seem to have worked hard at making these traits an ingrained part of their very BEING. Like most critical thinkers, I judge people based on what is consistently displayed regarding their attitudes & behaviours, for better and/or for worse. And even then, I believe everyone to be blessed by Our Lord with something called 'Freedom of Will &/or Choice' and extend them the benefit of the doubt that they might at some point make a sincere & concerted effort to improve upon themselves psycho-spiritually, as Carl Gustav Jung would have called it. We all, not matter how wretched, have redeeming qualities. Thus, I might erect a 'good fence' towards a transgressive individual, but I will also remain open to a later addition to that fence-say, a nice little gate or even a wheelchair accessible ramp leading to the house of my 'psyche', for those who may suffer from mental/emotional handicaps, but nevertheless are still working at their own 'rehabilitation.' 'Cause let's face it: We are all 'damaged goods'. It's what you do with what you've been left with that counts.

 

But all Chestertonian & cheeky metaphors & quips aside, (“Good fences make for good neighbours.”) let us explore what critical thinking actually is, & why it is so indispensable to anyone's education. (In fact, this is one area which is sorely lacking in most schools for young adults). And quite beautifully, an analysis of critical thinking is one entity which applies its own very principles in its dissection without nullifying and/or obscuring the results of said dissection. It is the mind pondering its own self, if you will. So, let's begin! Below are some of the criteria for honing one's critical thinking skills in ways which enrich not only one's own world, both inner & outer, but the worlds of our fellow human beings as well whenever we interact with them utilizing said skills & intelligence. 'Cause when we help ourselves, we are helping one another without immediately realizing it.

 

Oh, & by the way, I myself mainly taught my own self how to develop my critical thinking skills. I was never presented a 'formula', or a 'spreadsheet' or lesson book on such a thing. I think I personally picked it up merely through a love of learning (Philology) in general & through being a voracious reader. Reading comprehension is also another area that is indispensable to one's formal education which many schools seem to also be lacking in. When I was a tutor, many of my students who had been 'labeled' that way by our educational system, were not 'dumb' in the least. I noticed instead that, what they struggled with in regards to their study books & lesson formats, etc., was reading comprehension. For example, I was helping a young lady get her high school diploma, & she needed help with some of the questions in her History book. It wasn't that she failed to apply herself-in fact, she was one of the most motivated students I had come across, as she truly wanted to learn it & understand it. It was that she had trouble with understanding what the question was asking of her as far as to what 'answer' it was guiding her to arrive upon through her own deductions.

 

This is just a small example of how critical thinking & encouraging our children to use their minds to explore things for themselves is so tantamount. Mind you, the ability to think in a really abstract way doesn't begin to develop until about middle school age, and maybe a little later for some, but one's whole life itself in so many other ways can be adversely effected by a failure to either be guided in that direction by someone else, or to be disinclined to do so for oneself. Yes, it is true that not everyone is naturally intellectual or introspective, but I believe that every human individual is intrinsically gifted in each our own ways, both intellectually &/or in some other way less 'cerebral' & perhaps more 'physical'.

 

Nevertheless, in continuum, training the mind in how to think is kind of the actual point behind 'getting an education' (or it SHOULD BE.) It's not so much a matter of merely learning a whole bunch of facts & figures that we probably won't remember five years from now unless we use it on a daily basis, but rather, it is meant to 'exercise the intellectual faculties', if you will. To build up 'brawn-in-the-brain!' But I will save that discourse for another essay. This piece is no way meant to be a 'scholarly treatise' concerning Logic and/or Epistemology, or any other such thing as we are taught in the realms of Philosophy. It's just meant to be a more accessible guide to the realm of the miraculous & fascinating (& often frustrating & even disturbing) organ that is the human brain, or in this case, the human Mind is more apropos, since we will be exploring some of its more saliently 'abstruse' functions & features. Or, as we refer to it in plain English: Critical Thinking. And again, although there certainly are principles which can be applied, we mainly 'learn' this skill by practicing it in daily life & engaging in a conscientious, & responsible way with both the world 'inside' of ourselves & with the world 'outside' of ourselves.

'Wu Li'

 

First principle of Critical Thinking: Being mindful of the hindering presence of 'Wu Li.' 'Wu Li' is a Chinese expression denoting many differing things, one of which is “I Clutch My Ideas.” If one is to 'train the mind in the way that it should go' then first, we must start with a tabula rasa or 'clean slate.' Personally for me, in the 'family system' in which I was raised (but mostly 'put down') I was taught a lot of wrong things & ways of thinking about & perceiving not only my own self but the world outside of myself as well. Thus, I had more on my 'tabula' than some young adults that age, to make corrections to. In fact, most of it had to be completely erased before I could begin anew & see things, including my own self, clearly.

 

And I will add, this is a painstaking, arduous & often painful & frightening process. This is why a lot of people shy away from teaching themselves a better way to think, because they have, like I had, been programmed with a lot of misconceptions if not total lies & bullshit, if I may speak plainly. Thus, trust me, I know firsthand of the subject that I am addressing. I've been there. With that all having been said, then how can one go about doing this? First off, if you are looking for a 'Critical Thinking For Dummies' kind of checklist or 'How To', you may be disappointed. As I said before, each individual must make their own 'journey inward', if you will. It starts with a small step of self-reflection, day by day, eventually leading up to a deeper & more rewarding sense of self-awareness & knowledge. And although self-reflection is its own form of cogitating, it is just as essential to wholeness & actualization as a refinement of our critical thinking faculties.

 

The Greeks call the aforementioned phenomena of a deep & abiding sense of peace & happiness born of self-awareness & self-control, 'sophrosyne'. And trust me, when we come to take the time with ourselves to know ourselves, we will become much healthier & happier, at least relatively speaking. But mainly, in having gotten to know ourselves, we will be able to now actualize ourselves-our truest wants & desires out in the world. We will also experience the added benefit of being able to share in that health & happiness with others as well. As someone once sagely observed, “One cannot serve from an empty vessel.” But mostly, in keeping an open mind to continual learning we will achieve untold personal growth & fulfillment.

 

 

'Go With Your Gut'

 

This one applies the principle of 'If It Doesn't Seem 'Right', It Probably Isn't'. First off, I believe that everyone was created to possess an innate intuition of 'right' & 'wrong', in both a logistical sense, & even in a moralistic sense. (The moralistic part is fodder for another discussion, so I'll just set it on the 'pew' for now for later perusal). Although this premise may be exposed to doubt in the presence of some people who seemingly lack this inherent sense of higher intelligence, trust me, they've got it too; they just choose not to more fully develop it or to use it. And as far as the erroneous notion that some of us are just miraculously 'born' with high IQ's (not that anyone with half a brain even believes that there is only one category of higher intelligence, especially as measured by such a 'daft' instrument such as standard IQ tests extant currently).

 

But everyone must work at developing these faculties, & refining them. Yes, it is true that some people are more 'extroverted' & invest more of their time & energy into more 'outwardly' activities & endeavours, while other people are more 'introverted' & work at our best when we are invested with an equal balance of both 'inwardly' directed activities & endeavours as well as outwardly ones. (Although I have also had to work at developing my more 'extroverted' abilities & interests-no one is born a fully developed, well-balanced human being-but that's what keeps life interesting & challenging, right?). So, no excuses, people, you're smarter than that!

 

Incidentally, I find it funny how people who talk about these issues are often accused of being 'condescending'. Trust me, if I truly doubted your intelligence, or disregarded you so much as a capable human being, we wouldn't even be having this discussion. Thus, my main point for this entry is: Everyone is usually a whole hell of a lot capable & gifted than they think they are. The hardest yet most rewarding part of this is in finding out what makes you special & irreplaceable-because despite what that priggish boss once told you when you threatened to quit: “Well, everyone's replaceable.” you're NOT. Don't be afraid to shine, even when they try to dim it because it's shining in their eye!

 

But I will end it with this quick caveat: Be brilliant, but try not to be a jerk about it. But I guess some will need to be graded on a learning curve. After all, coming to know oneself & to be secure with that self in its totality takes many years, even decades to achieve-even for we more introspectively-inclined folk. 'Cause truly, I think a lot of 'assholery' comes from people who just aren't as sure of themselves & are afraid other people will notice. But if they could only realize how unnecessary all of that over-compensation is. If they would only just invest their energies in getting to know themselves, build up trust in themselves by making better choices in how they interact with their fellow human beings, and in how they treat themselves, would they come to realize that they never really needed all of that hubris & posturing in the first place.

 

Yet this is why learning how to 'go with your gut' takes work, just like any other psycho-spiritual endeavour. And perhaps it is even wise to teach ourselves this kind of 'critical thinking' before we should attempt any other schooling in critical thinking. Because we are all too aware how many brilliant people there are, who just seem to lack that amour-propre necessary for enabling them to utilize their intellectual gifts in ways that are redeeming & constructive to self & others, rather than demeaning & destructive.

 

Thus, no more of this Head Over Heart nonsense (Or even Heart Over Head)! We have both, & the world is a much more constructive & lovely place when we develop both Head & Heart to serve one another, rather than pitting them constantly against one another within our own minds & hearts. 'Cause the 'Head' can be thought of as the part of us that thinks: “Wait a minute. That just does not sound right.” And the 'Heart' can be thought of as the part of us that says: “Wait a minute. This just does not feel right.” And the Head is there to make sure that 'Lil Brother or Sister doesn't gets itself into a heap of trouble. And the 'Heart' is there to make sure that 'Big Brother or Sister doesn't lose its sense of humanity & morality. Thus, no more sibling rivalry! Mama Me says they will serve each other, or have their Internet taken away for a week!

 

 

'Thinking On A Higher Level Leads To Living On A Higher Level'

 

 

Many gifted authors have graced us with their wisdom on what they have termed, “EQ” or “Emotional Intelligence Quotient”. But what does a honing of the Intellect have to do with emotional intelligence? According to the current milieu, these two things must be regarded as mutually exclusive, right? And not only that, they must also be pitted one against the other & engineered to believe that they are one another's mortal enemies. But, I've already covered the whole 'head-over-heart' things in my last entry, so, I will now proceed into the next lesson in critical thinking-or at least the next 'paragraph' of it.

 

Not enough can be said about the virtues of a well-trained cognitive faculty. For a well-trained mind leads one to a well-lived life. Let me elaborate-at least briefly. Knowing how to synthesize information & how to make sense of all of the entropy which tends to afflict mortalkind everywhere (including plants & animals), reaps infinite rewards. Now, when I say 'infinite' I am speaking colloquially, within the very finite framework of a human lifespan not to exceed 120 years. Everything beyond that seems infinite to us, right? And although it may seem odd that we have to 'learn' how to think, considering that our scientific designation be 'homo sapiens', it is true. We do. Okay, maybe not in an informal sense, but we do have to learn how to think logically, effectively & constructively if we are to be enabled for self-actualization, especially in a world which has grown increasingly hostile & impeding to such virtuous human endeavours.

 

Because let's face it, those higher aspirations borne from the human spirit are not exactly enabled in our world. In fact, they are downright squelched at every possible impasse! In fact, this is why so many just give up & never actualize themselves on a higher & deeper level. But I definitely empathize with their plight-I am after all, human too. Cognitive Dissonance leading to Existential Nihility is a pernicious & intractable feature of our human consciousness & condition. But some of us thrive upon the challenge of creatio ex nihilo! We love to create something from nothing! Although technically, there is always something there, even at what physicists call an 'absolute zero' or vacuous state.

 

Or, as Aristotle once put it: “Natura abhoret a vacuo.” I know I abhor a vacuum. And maybe this is why I have never really felt bored for any long period of time during my life. My mind is always working-especially when I'm asleep & dreaming! Anyhoo, my premise for this entry is that taking the time to contemplate the mysteries of self, other & Universe is a worthy & very fruitful endeavour for all involved. Higher thinking also leads one to better living. Because once one has breached more of an understanding about this life & why we are here, one can actually begin living the answers instead of searching for them on an intellectual and emotional level.

 

In fact, many syntheses of mindstuffs find their apogee within a moment of being & doing out in the world. Plato's students became known as the 'Peripatetics”, named after their teacher who would pace up & down the grounds of the Lyceum as he lectured. Many still find this physical motion of the body helpful in tandem with thinking, speaking & learning. So, for those who still believe that is such a thing as a 'man of action' and a 'man of thought', & that the two are completely different species even from a completely disparate phyla, enough of this! Every human being contains within its potential, both a capacity for thought and action! In fact, the two are mutually exclusive elements, but in a reverse-mitosis kind of sense in that one cannot be fully actualized without the other!

 

Thus, forget about reductionistic labels of 'thinker' & 'doer'-you are both! Mind you, everyone has an unequal balance of any given set of traits and/or inherent abilities, but we all possess the potential for development either way. And although I have always loved the elegant turn of phrase by Heinrich Henne: “Mark ye well, ye men of action, ye are but the instruments of the men of thought.” I have to say that I can no longer enjoy it as much as I used to, seeing as I know better now & no longer agree with its premise that one can only be 'either-or'. We live in a world which attempts to engineer people's minds towards this militant form of dualism & vapidity. Sure, it may be easier for some to pretend that this Universe and all in it & beyond it, including themselves, are anything but astoundingly & wonderfully complex, but I prefer a world where impoverished quality of thought & quality of life will never become so familiar that I no longer even care whatever happened to my former & truer self.

 

 

'Jainist Manifoldness'

 

 

Within the East Indian school of thought called 'Jainism', there is a theory called the 'Jainist Theory of Manifoldness' which I have always held dear. This philosophy follows what in Sanskrit is called 'anekantavada', or the 'not-one-sided-doctrine'. Furthermore, this theory is predicated upon a principle of mental non-violence towards objects (& subjects) in contemplation. To clarify, it recognizes the manifoldness or complexity of every existing entity, & believes that such entities are violated through the reductionistic approach often taken towards them in order to understand & classify them. The term 'ekanta' describes these singular, absolutist predications. This theory was based on Mahavira's teachings, & also extended to a respect for the manifoldness not merely of 'objects and subjects', but of variant ideologies & thought-systems themselves.

 

Mahavira was a young prince who lived circa the 6th century B.C.E. Who, having become disenchanted with the trappings into which he was born, traveled his native India for 13 years. One day, as legend tells it, he experienced a feeling of unity with all creation & a liberation from all of his earthly woes. He named himself 'Jina', which means 'the conqueror' or 'conqueror of the Mind', & thereafter established a following of disciples who practiced his philosophy & lifestyle of righteous living, & nonviolence, both physical & psychological. What I love most about this particular view, is how it honours the complexity & irreducibility of all beings, especially human beings.

 

We all have experienced at some time in this life, being abused by a world which feels the need to 'cut us down to size' & to force us into demeaning, oppressive, & dehumanizing caricatures & reductionistic stereotypes. This doctrine, even in merely reading & absorbing its beautiful Truth, is vindication in its own way. It is also healing in its own way, merely by reading it & having my humanity & experience validated by others outside myself. We all need this mirroring, more than we know. So what does this have to do with my theme of 'critical thinking'? Everything! An illuminating & healing doctrine such as this was arrived upon through the very methodology of critical thinking on its feet! The higher we allow ourselves to think, and the deeper we allow ourselves to connect with ourselves, with others & with the Universe at large, the closer & closer we get to Wholeness & Transcendence.

 

You see, is it any wonder how this world, so ruled as it is by those “dark, unseen principalities” tries to lure people into thinking less & feeling less? Of course it does, because then, we remain in the dark, perhaps comfortable in our apathy, yet unfulfilled & deeply anguished at the same time. Yes, indeed, our minds must be very powerful entities, seeing as destructive forces seek to medicate & hypnotize them into non-being with such insidious persistence! I guess the point I'm getting at is that a failure to properly develop the mind can lead one to some very dark & even dangerous places. A rabbi once noted: “A truly devout man cannot be ignorant.” A unification of Mind & Spirit must be striven for if one is to fulfill what I believe to be this human existence's highest purpose & greatest honour: To become more & more each day, fully human, in that we may someday breach what it is to be in the full presence of the fully Divine, reunited with our true birth Father, the Ultimate Source of all Salvation & Amelioration.

 

 

'And The Mind Ponders Itself'

 

 

As I type this, my mind is forming thoughts. Oops-see, already an error. My mind was forming thoughts before I began typing this. Between the present perfect & the present-or is it by now the past tense? All so mercurially fleeting isn't it? Even when I read Jean Paul Sartre's 'Being & Nothingness' in my early twenties, despite my grasp of most of his thought processes, there were certain things I just didn't get. But I knew that, after reading a second & a third & however many other times, that I would experience the book in a slightly different way each time anyway, & so I just let it be. Letting it be, is key, I suppose, to a good rapport with one's own mind. If one can just release the fear of one's own mind perhaps leading one to a place where one does not want to go, then some real growth & progress can begin.

 

This is one of the more pernicious 'symptoms' of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Even being a person who courageously faces the Truth about myself, others & the world in general still does not preclude that of my own vulnerability & humanity in the face of it all. After about 20 years of relentless psychoanalysis & 'self-help' methods applied (most of which actually were very helpful to my healing process), I came to the realization that enough was enough. I had done the work as far as I could be expected to complete it & that it was best to leave the rest to more celestial powers. In a word, 'therapy' was beginning to become counterproductive for me beyond a certain point. Although those 'celestial powers' that I mentioned before were the powers helping me along the way the whole time, even when I felt close to the edge, much like the angel which spared Abraham his son Isaac's life when it pulled him away from the edge of the cliff. I personally feel His presence just as much and often more so in situations where I am able to resist some kind of evil from overtaking me, and not just in situations where I feel like doing a 'good deed' & then do it, spur-of-the-moment. Goodness is also achieved through resistance to Evil. But I won't delve too far into that one for this particular essay.

 

So, the mind pondering itself. What exactly is critical thinking? If I were to invent my own definition of it, it would go something like this: “the application of Reason & Intuition with the aim of arriving upon an adequate establishment of fact & truth as they relate to present reality.” But my mind is critical of that definition because not only do I possess an inherent distrust of all things reductionistic and the like & thus feel it lacking & limited in scope, but I also had to allow for an accommodation of relativity & temporality as it relates to epistemological entities such as “fact”, “truth”, and “reality.” Personally I make a distinction between “reality” & “truth.” Reality to me, is those phenomena which derive mainly from the 'physical' senses & from those deductions which are strictly logistical & communally evident to all persons perceiving said phenomena. Truth to me, deals with more intangible phenomena which derive mainly from more “intuitive” faculties of perception, which have as their most salient function & feature, the grasp of phenomena both metaphysical & absolute. To put it in another way: 'Reality' is relative & transient. 'Truth' is absolute & eternally fixed, or homeostatic.

 

But what does all of this have to do, again, with 'critical thinking'? Everything! My ability to discern Truth is no less essential than my ability to 'know facts' or to 'be in touch with 'reality'. We live in a world which also attempts to dichotomize these two salient & spiritually pertinent elements into mutually exclusive domains. This is often why we see many very 'sane' & highly sentient, lucid individuals (myself included) labeled as being 'insane' or 'mentally ill' by our society. This phenomena of course, has many causes, but this is one of them.

 

I also think that things that our society may have deemed acceptable & even willfully engineered us into doing as children, if manifested in an adult, gets 'pathologized' and/or demonized. For example, whenever I feel lonely, I still invent 'imaginary friends' inside of my own head. I know they are 'not real', just as much as I knew when I was a child, nevertheless, I am wise to keep this behaviour to myself & not to exhibit it out in society. Although I still, even in an age of Bluetooth & Mp3 players get gawked at whenever I am taking aloud to myself walking down the street. It is sad how much spontaneity & joy we are denied as 'adults' due to this & other forces at play, but unfortunately, we must adapt. But, both 'realms of mind' are equally as healthy, and equally as valid, so long as they are balanced out with the other essentials in life. The truly 'insane' are often deemed the societal ideal & norm. Not that I am saying that all 'conformists' are sociopaths in lamb's wool, but I merely refer to those individuals who, back when it was called this, would have been deemed 'criminally insane', or as I like to call it 'morally insane.'

 

Although I definitely do not believe that these individuals can credibly claim insanity as a legal tactic & defense. Evil people choose to do & to be evil. This, to me, is the true definition of pathology, insanity and/or 'mental illness.' But no matter how many new terms we invent to put into the DSM, the human condition will not be helped as long as we feel the need to re-victimize the victim-to demoralize the human being who has already been demoralized enough in most cases, through systematic childhood abuse. And this is where the evils & damages of a world which thrives on a paucity of feeling & humanity & a shallowness of analysis & intellectual pursuit, are revealed in their crudity. And the same phenomena can be witnessed in our criminal justice system.

 

As long as some people choose to judge & to treat their fellow human beings based on dehumanizing & demoralizing stereotypes & feeble-minded worldviews, the inequity & iniquity will continue. Yet another case in point for the redeeming virtues of 'critical thinking'. And so it seems that the title of this here entry: 'And The Mind Ponders Itself' has digressed (or perhaps progressed) into some of the most eminent reasons why it is driven & must remain driven to ponder itself & the condition into which it has been borne: To continue its search for Truth & Justice in a world which seeks to turn the human mind upon itself, so that the Truth becomes obfuscated by all of the meaningless & distractionary chaos & idiocy.

 

 

 

 

 

 

ON SANCTIFICATION & THE CONTINUAL STRUGGLE WITH SIN

Even after our conversion, believers continue to be besetted by the temptation to commit and/or the committal of bodily sins. Yet as we allow the indwelling of the Holy Spirit to sanctify & anoint us, He will remove these 'thorns' from our flesh one by one. We must only persevere in our submission to the Lord's will for our lives and our bodies. And we can always take comfort that: "...being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." (Philippians 1:6) And soon enough we will find, that those offerings of the 'flesh' which we once revelled in, pale in comparison to the pleasures & nourishing of the 'fruits' of the Holy Spirit. The 'feelings' and experience we have while walking with the Lord will eventually cause the 'sins of the flesh' to lose their allure as we experience more & more fulfillment & joy in Him.

 

 

 

 

DO WE AUTOMATICALLY ASCEND TO HEAVEN UPON OUR PHYSICAL EXPIRATION?

For the sake of expediency & clarity, I'll try to keep this summary spare. What we do know & can deduce from the Scripture itself is that no one but Jesus Christ has actually ascended to heaven in His totality of being. This Scripture is pretty clearly spoken in John 3:13: “No one has ascended into heaven except the one who came down from heaven.” Furthermore, in 1 Timothy 6:16, we are told that Christ alone “is immortal and dwells in unapproachable light.”

 

Thus, the issue becomes one of semantical differentiation & assignation. The 'spirit' spoken of in Ecclesiastes that 'returns unto the one who gave it' most likely refers to God's sustaining life breath itself (ruach) which departs the body at physical death. Secondly, the immortal human 'soul' (psyche) is not to be confused with the 'Holy Spirit' which is imparted unto believers. This aspect of the believer by essence also most likely returns unto the One Who gave it upon somatic expiration.

 

Our individual 'souls' must therefore be assumed to remain in 'sleep' before they are 'awoken' to appear before God & Christ at the 'White Throne Judgment' to be judged before being either accepted into Heaven or condemned. Based upon the imperative of Scriptural integrity, this should be the only answer to our inquiries which stands to reason, in both our 'intellects' as well as our 'hearts'.

 

ON EVIL

Evil is the natural theological effect of the Satanic force arising out of the Enemy's oppositional intent towards Good. Yes, God created all things & creatures/entities, but 'allows' for freedom of will & choice in that His plan may be manifest & brought to its utmost completion & perfection. Now, this is not to suggest that God merely allows for evil to play out for His own sadistic amusement. But rather, that He is Good & Holy, & that this world in which we now live is ruled by dark, unseen principalities with the purpose of bringing all to completion & perfection.

 

Without the Darkness (Evil), God's Goodness & Light would not be complementarily contrasted & thus, fully revelled in & spiritually benefited from, by His children. The presence of Evil brings us nearer & nearer to spiritual maturation through the necessary submission of ourselves to the workings of the Holy Spirit. And, speaking personally, if I had not encountered and had to be subject to certain evils in my life, I would not have been nearly as motivated to seek out God's Word and God's will & plan for my life.

 

Suffering & Darkness draws us nearer to our Heavenly Father & to His Love & Light & Truth. Therefore, God created beings with the potential for evil, although this is merely a naturalistic outcome of the world which He allows to run its course. But we must never forget that the Lord's reasons for doing anything that He has done or will do always stem from pure Goodness, Love & Perfect Wisdom.

ON THE ISSUE OF SEXUAL IMMORALITY

Philosophically speaking, all human beings are potentially vulnerable to sexual immorality. And sexual immorality assumes many forms, even known to being practiced in the so-called ‘marriage bed.’ As in the case of homosexuality, I believe that these urges are mainly due to corruptive exposures in one's earliest environment and to the culture at large which pervert one's views on things related to gender, sexuality and morality. I also believe that in most cases, it is due to some kind of trauma having been experienced where violations of one's person of a sexual nature have interfered with normal psychosexual development. However, all of God's professed children are called to strive to resist each our own temptations, whatever our perfidious proclivities may be. And though we may stumble along the way, he will never let us fall, as long as we sincerely repent and give Him control over our lives again.

 

 

 

 

 

 

PHILOSOPHY & THEOLOGY

Overall, the study of Philosophy can prime our minds for critical thinking development, which can certainly be useful in this life. But I also believe that God imparts reason and higher wisdom where cognitive dissonance may be present, through His Holy Spirit and His Word. In other words, one's intellectual and spiritual development are not solely dependent upon 'secular' academic pursuits, or upon mere biblical scholasticism, but one can complement the other. As with all things, it's a matter of application.

 

ON THE INFALLIBILITY OF SCRIPTURE

Many ‘false brethren’ out there will make the claim that there is only one proper version of the Scripture. Yet what they fail to realize is that it is important not to equate a version of the Bible that uses different words and phrasing with one that is therefore, merely because it is referred to as 'another version', steeped in perverse or unsound Theology or exegetics. Reputable Exegetes who have studied both the KJV as well as the NIV versions of the Bible, agree upon the uniformity of their shared soundness of Theology.

 

Certain words & phrasing may differ, but in this case, this does not equate to a deviation of inerrancy. This is why it is essential that we interpret Scripture in light of God's intended meaning of each passage (“exegesis”) and not our own fallible, sin-self-serving interpretation (“eisegesis”). If either the KJV and/or the NIV or others, are perceived to be errant, the fault lies with the reader and not the original Authors and interpreters.

 

SACRED VS. SECULAR LITERATURE:

To Read Or Not To Read?

In many cases one still arrives upon a discovery of Ultimate Truth, which I believe to be found in the Holy Scriptures of Judeo-Christianity, while remaining open to more 'secular' avenues of thought. This is mostly due to all so-called human intellectual endeavours being, I believe, a mere iteration of either God's intelligence and wisdom or Satan's deceptions.

 

This is not to say that a well-rounded exposure to other avenues of thought, when undertaken with a sincere intention of arriving upon God's Ultimate Truth, can strengthen one's faith and also authenticate it, as it has withstood the test of false doctrines & cognitive fallacy. A healthy flexibility of intellect, when exercised in subordination to the Scriptures, can actually support one's spiritual development and growth.

 

However, 'secular literature', etc. not explored in tandem with the Scriptures, can and will lead one into the darkness of perplexity and existential angst and despair. I have personally walked down both paths, and thankfully never traveled down the latter path so far that my Heavenly Father and Saviour could not reach me and restore me to health in both mind and Spirit. I like to look at Judeo-Christianity as being the perfect synthesis of Intellect- or 'Head' (Judaism), and Spirit-or 'Heart' (Christianity). For truly, all is made complete in Him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

ON CYBER-BULLYING

In today's split social realm of “cyber” time vs. “non-cyber” time, (although that gap is deftly closing) much good has come out of this shift, & much bad has come out of it as with all human 'progressive' endeavours. The good that has come out of it is more obvious in how people who live in different geographical locations can still “keep in touch” via any of the various “social media” sites available today.

 

However, I wish to focus on only some of the negative effects that this increasing foray into a mostly cybernetic life has had. The main one that I wish to express my thoughts on is how many persons, who would otherwise be deemed “sociopathic” and/or “criminal-minded & intentioned” often thrive with insidious relish on the cybernet. After all, people can always “hide” behind falsely self-representative “avatars” & even “User names”, etc.

 

It never ceases to both fascinate & yet astound (& even disturb) me, how many crimes of the emotional & psychological variation run rampant on various websites & social media forums. In most states, at least here in the United States Of America in which I reside, the kinds of verbal & emotional/psychological violence which some people inflict upon others is punishable by law amongst “regular” society.

 

For example, the crime designated as “intentional infliction of emotional distress” is, at least in my state of Ohio, deemed a Felony which is not only subject to “criminal” prosecution but also subject to “civil” prosecution (lawsuits). Thus, unfortunately, many of these people who cannot fulfill their criminal & psychopathological impulses out within “regular” society find their relative Utopia on the World Wide Web.

 

In fact, if anyone has ever interacted (even with the best of intentions) on any website, eventually one will see this become a disturbing verity before their very eyes. Although it is true that the issue of legislation of “cyber” laws to bring these people to justice & to protect the community (especially children & teens) from these kinds of people & the enforcement of them would be tricky if not altogether impossible to implement & sustain.

 

Nevertheless, this is why it is of utmost importance for individual users (who, of course are not of the “perpetrator” variety) to report (or merely don't play into) any abusive &/or potentially harmful activity (& that most certainly includes “verbal” activity as the Internet is mostly a “verbally-centered” interface) to the administrators of whatever particular website the crime (& make no bones about it-yes, emotional abuse/psychological violence is a crime!) is committed on. Things can be done, one person at a time to promote a healthy & safe environment for all persons except those “cyber-criminals” mentioned above who have forfeited this privilege through their recklessness & malfeasance.

 

We must remember: Where there are people, there needs to be laws & this includes the Internet! All human beings need to be held accountable for any acts of malfeasance-this holds true for “regular” society & for “cyber-society.” Most importantly, there needs to be laws that are consistently enforced if any human society/community is to remain free from undue distress or impingement upon its overall well-being. And this includes each individual cyber-user to develop discernment of more ‘hidden’ and ‘covert’ forms of psychological violence and abuse which certain types of individuals employ. It's up to each one of us to keep our cyber-communities healthy & safe mostly by not engaging AT ALL with cyber-abusers. Let the session hereby commence! Vulneratus non victus, cyber-bullies!

 

COMPLEX PTSD & PTSD: MENTAL 'ILLNESS' OR PSYCHOLOGICAL 'INJURY'?

“Survivors of severe, systematic and prolonged abuse, whether as a child, teen and/or an adult get labelled as being "mentally ill", when in fact, we are suffering from Complex PTSD, which is now acknowledged as a 'neurological and psychological injury' and not a "mental illness." And while an individual may suffer from what they call "comorbid" symptoms and conditions, I believe that the application of Occam's Razor ("Assume no more than is necessary") is the most expedient, and least harmful way to approach Trauma-related conditions, both diagnostically and therapeutically.”

-Valerie Lynn Stephens

 

 

 

There has been much heated debate about the assertion that Complex PTSD is not a mental illness but a psychological 'injury'. The reasons for distinguishing between the terminology is not to derogate or to make comparisons about who is 'ill' and who is 'healthy', but to unburden survivors of the internalized shame which their original abusers inflicted upon them by the abuse of psychiatric terminology and diagnostics to scapegoat and dominate them. Basically, what it comes down to is: The abusive, exploitative, sociopathic individuals who injured us in the first place are the ones who must be identified as 'mentally and morally ill' if deep recovery is ever to be breached for survivors.

 

After all, most of our Complex Trauma is a direct result of being coerced and systematically 'programmed' and gaslighted into an interpersonal dynamic which merely sought to 'scapegoat' us into being the 'identified patient' and the one with the 'problems'. In truth, it was our abusers who suffered such disorders of personality and character. Of course, this is not meant to discount the fact that many sufferers of C-PTSD and PTSD have not been diagnosed with 'comorbid' conditions.

 

However, many professionals and laymen alike have often remarked that if the DSM were refined, many conditions currently being treated as discrete disorders would, in fact, be best served and acknowledged as direct and indirect symptoms of deeper interpersonal trauma. Nevertheless, the importance of, as Shahida Arabi puts it, engaging in 'reverse discourse' with our 'programmers' and abusers, remains an intractable aspect of full and deep recovery for all survivors.

 

We have earned the right (in fact always possessed the right) to be assessed fairly and pro-socially, in ways that are not merely more demeaning and derogatory, and in ways that do not, at the expense of our well-being, merely reinforce old ‘roles’ and cognitive patterns which predatory and character-disturbed individuals would benefit in keeping us in.

 

There is a moral imperative for each individual to be granted full reign over that of their own self-actualization. There is also a moral imperative for each one to “carry their own load” (and not just physically, but psychologically). We all must do our own ‘Soul Work’, as it has been called, in order to not only stop the cycle of injury which humankind seems to relish and choose indifference towards inflicting upon one another, but to support a healthier, more robust Society for all individual persons to be able to contribute each their own brand of genius and skills to. As within, so without. Thus, individual recovery work is a potential salve for the collective, one Complex PTSD thriver at a time.

 

SAVOIR VIVRE

 

 

Perhaps the first half of our lives are spent figuring out how to best live them, and the rest, putting this wisdom into execution. But what if someone is having a hard time figuring it out? Is it better then to live in mere search of the answers, or should they perhaps live out the questions themselves? Are the answers then, without question, perhaps already known? Yet another a priori vs. a posteriori existential/epistemological age old debate gets put again into play. Furthermore, could the questions be also an answer to the last known address of the Soul where Fear & Doubt resided, compelling us on to examine why we have become so fearful & faithless?

 

But if only it was all that simple. Thus, if the questions & their answers consume so much, then what is the alternative to accessing this a priori/a posteriori knowledge for those who are incapacitated or indisposed to do so? Perhaps we must then direct our psycho-spiritual reserves into convincing ourselves of what I believe to be our pre-existent state of Wholeness & Wisdom. And I suppose this is where that other "F" word, Faith comes in-believing in not only a higher being, but most of all, believing in ourselves to just step back & let it all be, unfolding naturally to each its own perfection of Design & Providence. For the mortal human mind seems to have absolutely no doubts regarding that of its immanent mortality, yet when it comes to Life? Well, that's the tricky part, isn't it.

 

Then again, of course we have an easier time coming to terms with our own eventual physiological demise, for we know that our consciousness, too, will have ceased. And as the Judeo-Christian scripture states: "For the dead have neither memory nor knowledge." Thus, will we have become, in the most ultimate sense, indomitable, completely invulnerable. While alive, we are inescapably exposed to Life's vagaries. For the very conscious, willful act of choosing & believing in Life, invites upon us, many deaths-before-dying-indeed ones far more excruciating than any cessation with finality.

In finale, if pain & death are the gravest fears of humanity, and we go to such lengths to lessen if not completely evade it, perhaps the questions should be lived out then? Perhaps living in & of itself, is the only viable answer, however simple yet profound it might be. Or, as some believe, perhaps Life shouldn't be performed life a soliloquoy of endless inquiry, but like a dance of surrender & grace. Perhaps this is the only way that the most pertinent information can filter through, thereby freeing our energial reserves to allow the Soul to live as it already knows how to live. Yes, perhaps this is the only way we can actualize ourselves with as much efficacy & expedience as possible, given the profound complexities of our human condition & experience, and the nanosecond which we have been granted to actualize it.

 

And last but certainly not least, perhaps Mystery is sweet, but maybe a cultivation & practice of Simplicity is the most edifying in the end. Perhaps we truly do not need worry ourselves with the legalisms, as there are many lives to live, and many possible paths to take upon each our own human journey. For ultimately, don't we all naturally intuit that they all lead to the same wellspring of Redemption & Salvation? In the end, there is not right or wrong formula when it comes to those calculations Metaphysical, and wholly transcendent. For the Spirit already has its own adept, infallible compass to lead us out of the wilderness. And no matter how trite it might sound at first to us, letting go & letting all just be, is key -of course, to the best of our mortal human fallibility & finitude. To end with the immortally irreverent words of the late Jack Kerouac: "All is well. Practice kindness. Heaven is nigh."

 

ON MINKOWSKI'S 4-DIMENSIONAL WORLD-THEORY AS A METAPHOR FOR HUMAN PREDESTINATION & ACTUALIZATION

 

 

Life, time and space are all continuity of consciousness. Thus one could say this represents the 3-D theory of the world, non-mathematically speaking that is. For there is body, soul and then mind. Or there is the physical, the subjective and the objective, respective to their terms. Throughout this exploration, I will be referencing German 19^th century mathematician Hermann Minkowski, who is credited for his work on extra-dimensionality in space-time configurations & concepts. However in postulating Minkowski’s 4-D world, there is one more element we must add to this model-God, the Creator and Sustainer of it all. For here is where the circle of life or world theory is made complete. Supposedly also, from a mathematical/spatial standpoint, this 4th dimension of Minkowski’s is impossible to construct within one’s mind. I say not, and it is quite simple-so simple that may be why some have not thought of it.

Imagine 3 trees in the middle of an otherwise vacant field. Now try to envision if there was a line drawn from tree to tree, connecting them all. There would be formed, simply enough, a triangular shape. The 4th dimension is then all of the area surrounding these trees and the field. Quite simple to me. This of course, correlates to the current postulation of “dark matter” and “dark energy” proposed by physicists & cosmologists and the like. Or, to reference a more antiquitous proposal, the 4th dimension is that old Michelson/Morley “ether.” This 4th dimension is what enwombs, what encompasses, what cradles it all. It could be theorized as being God Himself/Herself/Itself. Thus, perhaps not merely one “God-particle” aka, the “Higgs boson”, but a whole time-space-matter-energial field of them.

This can also be used as a metaphor for solipsism, which states that the only thing that can be truly real to the self is the self, and how each individual thing, person is both equally a singular part of its surroundings or world and also a collective part of it. Furthermore, on the 4th dimension seen as God, it is every being’s breach of revelation, transformation and rebirth into new and complete life and living. For the mind, body and soul would perish but if not for the sustaining presence of their Creator. Hence, the 4th dimension is indeed that “quarkian”, hidden dimension, most elemental yet essential of them all.

Furthermore, & in theory, if Minkowski’s idea, which stated that each person’s past and future meet at one point always converging indefinitely at the point in time which is now or the present, based on his Pythagorean-based model, we can postulate then that perhaps there is such a thing as predestination or Divine Providence. Which means that everything, much like in the mathematical model, is already mapped out for one’s given life. This would all be broadly speaking, of course, for perhaps this model cannot account for each individuated variable.

 

Moreover, it can allow for any given path to be chosen, which slightly deviates from the predestinational model while also maintaining its ontological tensegrity. That is to say, that God exists within a state of what theologians would call “omniscience” and probably what physicists would call “quantum superposition,” whereby he can predict both what each individual person will choose, as well as what the end game of those choices will be. This, to some degree would allow for both predestination & individual freedom of will & choice to coexist.

 

Nonetheless, what Minkowski was saying was that there are 3 points in space-time that can be figured as one’s past, present and future. This, generally speaking, is very feasible and makes a lot of sense. But it is important to note that this 3-point diagram does not make a triangle as one’s mind is apt to automatically assume, but rather, a straight or slightly curved line. Now were it just a line and not a metaphorical concept demonstrated with geographical configurations and actualizations, then even Minkowski or Einstein, who was a pupil of the former, truly could not state with scientific certainty beyond the shadow of a doubt that this line would indeed go into infinity or continue on indefinitely. For we do not know yet whether time-space has an ending or a beginning, for we who are currently living have never gone there!

But for the sake of speculation, if this time-space continuum known as past, future and present does continue on indefinitely then we can call “infinity” or substitute the term “indefinitely” with “the afterlife” or even “eternity.” So we could twist it in a theological or philosophical/metaphysical direction. And we could even go back into time and consider the possibility of each person’s pre-destination in their “past.” Indeed, in the realm of quantum mechanics, past, present & future particles have been observed to become “entangled” in many instances. And, if we are composed of the same “stuffs” as quantum particles...well, fodder for a whole other kind of discussion. Even in Judeo-Christian concepts, each person born is known by God to be born in the future and the details of that person are known on the most minute scale. This is not to be confused with the more Eastern ideology of reincarnation, for in Judeo-Christian notions, a person remains the same person and does not switch incarnations throughout his or her life, of which there are two, this one and the afterlife. But nevertheless, Minkowski’s model can echo these sentiments quite nicely when put into that perspective. Basically, if there’s a point at which our future is supposed to meet our present (and not just our past), selves-perhaps we need not worry so much about the details of our life's spacetime trajectory. Perhaps we can rest assured that, as long as we honour past & future within the present, both predestination and the dignity of free will, shall be fulfilled & preserved.

 

 

 

 

 

THE VOID OF A VOID: ZERO POINT ENERGY

 

 

 

My well has run dry and I cannot even describe the sheer Terror & Anguish this brings. My whole life is in the balance upon the tip of the pen. I never even imagined that I would lose my desire to create. A part of me that has always been so essential to my well-being is seemingly lost, gone. And I would suffer even the most unimaginable horrors just to get it back-my chi-my life force. Although this horror is, in and of itself very much nigh the mark of unimaginability and Despair.

 

There is something in the human soul which clamors for elucidation & expression. It is a need next to none. Does this reside only within the soul of the Artiste or in everyone? Everything is at a standstill as long as the heart remains unstirred. It is a nothingness and existential sense of nullity which even Sartre or Nietzsche never touched upon. For between Being & Nothingness lies an even deeper abyss. Perhaps its name is Apathy. Or perhaps it is Mother to Apathy-Ambivalence. We can never escape non-being, but can we ever embrace being? Yet we must, if the Void is ever to have any meaning.

 

Every force produces its equal and opposite reaction and not strictly in the Newtonian and phenomenological sense. Meaning itself derives from the union of opposites. And perhaps this is a gift, for nothing-not even nihility itself-is ever truly meaningless. Although this does not lessen our pain in the face of it. But the presence of the pain, parthenogenically born from our sense of barrenness, futility and emptiness nevertheless suggests a fullness & abundance of Being which is always there, even but if only as images within the ever-envisaging human psyche.

 

Hence, even Nothingness is always, quite Something. Zero-point energy. And oftentimes, our pain is, in itself, the salve for our pain. For as long as one is feeling, or as long as one is conscious of something-one is Being, one exists, is alive, has substantiality. This is often why we cling to our pain at the fear of never finding relief, or perhaps we fear that we will? We must have something to hold onto, even if this thing which we cling to is, in actuality, a losing of our grip.

 

To lose always includes a gain and a gain, an equally commensurate loss. This is why the ability to hold onto Joy should be regarded as nothing less than the miraculous display of an inner fortitude and Virtue of Sisyphean task. For it is indeed, a superhuman feat, belonging to the leagues of all ontological argument, where the Ideal always presupposes the Actuality. For truly, there is no evidence that Joy is a more valid and noteworthy emotion than that of Sorrow, especially in a world of such fleeting felicity.

 

The doctrines of Nihilism are very seductive, and even more still, when we must inhabit a mind and heart which often cannot choose between Equanimity or Struggle. To choose between one Truth or the other which is just as much of a verity-is at the heart of the human condition and the various configurations of trilemma and seemingly endlessly regressive doctrines and Byzantium ontological architecture we must decipher and navigate. The attendant Fear is often so great, that neither nor is secure. For just as soon as we wholly embrace one Truth, its equal yet antinomial opposite becomes all too manifest. And then we are ravaged and lost once again.

 

But this truth is exactly what makes all forms of bigotry thrive. Thus must we learn to embrace it all, although no one person can even know or see it all. This is the true act of Faith, where Ambiguity must become the God we worship daily before the indestructible Shrine Of Exigency. And learning how to persist in this cruel task without becoming totally adrift is a lesson that only the blessed can fully assimilate. For not unlike our love, belief and conviction must be spread just thin enough that it can maintain its clarity of purpose and efficacy, without losing its viscosity. For we can become One only when we embrace it all with equal measures of awe and expectancy. Then we are secure and left with the Ultimate and most essential task of all: Becoming all that we are.

 

Between Being & Nothingness lies a Perfection already operant behind it all. We are complete. We are whole. We are meaning. We are the Universe. Life is in love with us. Will we marry it? Oh, we already have-even in our hours of Despair & Faithlessness. Nihility is an illusion. It is all full beyond measure. The only Void which exists is the Void of a Void.

 

 

 

 

 

ON THE BIOLOGICAL MODEL FOR PSYCHIATRY

While there may be individuals who work within the mental health field who would agree that complex interpersonal trauma injury sustained as children and adults needs much more inclusion in the diagnoses of individuals seeking treatment in the mental health field, the fact is, there are too many larger forces at play which keep the system where it is and what it is. I, like so many others, have learned this the hard way. In attempting to point out how things like emotional abuse and abuses as a child and an adult can be invalidated as direct causes of complex trauma, many working within the mental health field do not want to acknowledge this.

 

Furthermore, the issue gets muddied by focusing too much upon purely physiological factors, intentionally in some cases. Being treated with dignity and respect in the mental health field can be tricky due to this. I think this is mainly because many people don't want to face it, or deal with these dark realities present in themselves and in others. Yet I think it is safe to say that most of the emotional duress which human beings undergo which then may lead to mental health 'diagnoses' is a direct and indirect cause of interpersonal trauma and abuses.

 

But the truth is, there are a lot of people who are still 'hoodwinked' by the system. I was partly hoodwinked for a time myself. If we fail to dig deep and treat the WHOLE person then people will not be helped. People need consistently genuine and active compassion and understanding, not more labeling, mismanaging, invalidation, pathologization & demonization.

 

Moreover, the absence of an awareness of having deeper trauma does not mean that one does not have it. If every human being on the face of the planet dug really deep, they'd find it. Some people are just not as self-aware. To be human is, by essence, to have been traumatized or adversely effected/affected by at least something. Furthermore, it doesn't matter how seemingly 'small' or prolonged trauma is, it is all profoundly impacting upon us. And in response to those who make the fallacious and Cartesian claim that we must focus upon the neuro-chemical imbalances present in trauma survivors at the expense of the deeper issues underlying the etiology of such neuro-chemical imbalances, the two are not mutually exclusive, and it is harmful to treat them as such. And besides, the biological model for psychiatry was always just that-a reductionistic postulate. And this is what we mean by treating the WHOLE PERSON.

 

Things like Depression, Anxiety, etc. do not arise out of a vacuum, and the chemical imbalances, and other health issues that they cause are directly related to psychological and emotional duress of some variation or another. While it is true that not all 'hardships' cause major mental health issues in and of themselves, the nature of emotional and psychological trauma is usually cumulative, not just incidental, and this supports what we are coming to understand and what we know about the interconnectivity and 'web'-like functionality of neuro-anatomical structuring.

 

Furthermore, it is a gross misconception that complex trauma can only be caused in the minds of children and not adults. I personally find the whole Western approach to medicine reductionistic, and ultimately have seen the harm that it does to the human soul. And an individual being treated for depression is also an individual being treated (hopefully) for some kind of underlying issue. The two are usually not mutually exclusive entities. Yet here ladies and gents is where we enter into the realm of Physiology vs. Metaphysiology. That epic dialectic between the Exoteric and the Esoteric.

 

Overall, I personally believe that human beings are far too complex to be reduced to merely physiological epiphenomena. This is the problem with using only the Western model of medical science. Too Cartesian for my own personal knowledge and experience base. It is so important that the medical community not dismiss some of what's regarded as the 'soft' sciences as completely complementary to so-called 'hard' science. Realms such as Philosophy, Psychology, Theology, Sociology, etc. are equally necessary to study for healthy and optimal development and treatment of the human person.

 

In finale, as with all tools, it's about the intentions of those wielding them which determines it's helpfulness or harmfulness. There are good people working in the mental health system as well as not so good folks. It is what it is, but we can all make the best of it. And we must take the reigns on our own health, well-being and growth. But those helping us along the way also need to make sure they are operating within the bounds of that as well. It's a collaborative effort. And from my own experience, some practitioners misuse their knowledge with the intention of exploiting vulnerable people who merely end up being retraumatised. That's what I was referring to about wielding it properly.

 

An individual's 'existentialia' as Martin Heidegger called it, is very, very pertinent information regarding not only understanding of the presented condition but also treatment. Overall I think that the DSM would benefit from having the etiology of all psychiatric conditions listed, especially as it relates to trauma. After all, why should more credibility be given for, say a strictly 'physical' designation/condition than a 'mental' one regarding its origins/causes. Also, we now know that the holistic model is being proven more and more comprehensive and accurate as far as diagnosis, prognosis, etc. are concerned. Mind and body are most definitely symbiotically ensconced.

 

Hopefully, as our knowledge and understanding expands, we will begin to grant more robust medical credibility to trauma-related conditions which cannot be strictly classified as having a 'physiological' and/or 'neurophysiological' etiology. This approach, while perhaps not intended by everyone who uses it, is very invalidating and dismissive, thus re-injurious to survivors of horrific childhood and adulthood trauma and abuse, whose diagnosed conditions are a direct consequence of their interpersonal traumas. And as mentioned before, the biochemical model for psychiatry is also understood by most medical professionals and laymen alike, as being postulate.

 

In a word, the 'hard' sciences approach for psychological diagnostics and treatment arose out of humankind's attempt to explain and then treat what is more philosophically understood as 'the human condition' as it struggles to survive the horrors of evil on this earth. I suppose this more rigorous, honest and inclusive approach depends upon whether or not an individual acknowledges the verity of phenomena which lie beyond the borders of hard 'Science' and whether or not that individual is viewing ultimate reality with eyes wide open or eyes wide shut. If it be the latter, they become merely yet another part of the problem rather than the solution. And these issues of course, beg a whole other discussion.

P.S.

John Mudrow wrote an interesting and quite compelling book which explores this subject entitled: “How To Become A Schizophrenic: The Case Against Biological Psychiatry”.

 

THE FINAL FRONTIER: A PHYSICS/METAPHYSICS ANALOG

 

 

What we discretely refer to as 'Science' vs. 'Spirituality', or 'Physics' vs. 'Metaphysics', are not mutually exclusive systems. In fact, the very same phenomena observed by physicists and the like, are also referred to in the Scriptures. From the Book of Genesis and on, naturalistic phenomena are recorded which we are merely referencing in the annals of humanistic discovery. That is to say, we are merely reiterating in our observations, the verity of pre-existent actualities created and set forth not by humankind, but by God Himself.

 

In the Book of Revelation, we also find eschatological references which correspond with inferences drawn in the 'hard science' and 'soft science' realms of Cosmology, Astrophysics and Quantum Mechanics (this area of study, while steeped in 'hard science' datum, may be considered by some 'purists' to be a 'soft science' due to the theoretical base imposed upon it by quantifiably observable naturalistic limitations). For example, when our sun exhausts its nuclear energy and begins its transformation into a red giant star, thus baking all of the earth and those who dwell upon it in cosmic radiation, after which it will collapse into a black hole, we find parallels in 2 Peter 3:11-12 “Since all these things are to be destroyed in this way, what sort of people ought you to be in holy conduct and godliness, looking for and hastening the coming of the day of God, because of which the heavens will be destroyed by burning, and the elements will melt with intense heat!” as well as in Isaiah 34, verse 4 (possible black hole reference) “And the sky will be rolled up like a scroll...”.

 

Furthermore, the findings in Physics, Quantum Physics, Astrophysics, and just Physics in general concerning what is most commonly know as Albert Einstein's 'Theory of Relativity', also bear Scriptural precedent. For example, in 1 Timothy 6:16 it refers to Jesus Christ as someone "who alone is immortal and who lives in unapproachable light, whom no one has seen or can see.” This could be a reference to the constants as observed by scientists regarding the limit imposed upon earthly biological entities regarding superluminosity, gravity and quantum mechanical limits such as Pauli's Exclusion Principle which observes how no two electrons (of which no atom can have more than two electrons) can occupy the same space at the same time (or have the same four quantum electronic numbers, hence 'spin' in atoms with half-integer spin such as electrons and fermions). This Principle also more metaphorically parallels the infinite complexity and uniqueness of each and every thing and being which God has created.

 

Moreover, the verse which refers to “unapproachable light” by many is thought to allude to the speed of light constant, which no human entity since Christ has been able to breach. Furthermore, according to Einstein's Special Theory of Relativity, and what physicists who study black holes have correlated, as one approaches the speed of light, time, to an earth-dweller would appear to come to a complete stand-still. This could be just another way of describing what happens when one has surpassed the light-speed constant for earth, or in essence has breached 'eternity' or timelessness. Of course, to us it would appear to have 'stopped' for the individual who has reached beyond the event horizon of a black hole, because the ability to observe 'time' is limited to our current biological and physical calculations and extrapolations.

 

Also, when pondering things such 'eternity' and 'infinity' in a theoretical sense, we, upon our glimpse into areas such as physics and quantum physics, more specifically regarding astrophysical bodies named by theoretical physicist John Wheeler as 'black holes' (a term first introduced by him in 1967), (who also introduced the term 'wormhole' in 1957), begin to see striking and fascinating parallelisms. Polish theoretical physicist Nicodem Poplawski has made striking observations related to black hole behaviour. Instead of the postulation that the intense gravitational pull of every black hole inevitably leading to a singularity, he has postulated another viewpoint, with torsional vortexes being instead created which lead to a 'white hole' portal into another universe. This strikingly parallels the Scripture which refers to the Kingdom of Heaven as being "many mansions" being created. (John 14:2)

 

When Albert Einstein proposed his Theory of Special Relativity in a paper published in the German physics Journal Annalen der Physik in 1905, he posited the existence of an electromagnetic particle which he called a 'photon' which would have be the cornerstone for what would develop into the area of Quantum Theory later. He also posited in this Theory of Special Relativity, that only non-accelerating observers would experience a uniformity of the observed laws of physics regarding the speed of light outside of a vacuum. His theory of General Relativity, which postulated gravity as being not a 'force' per se, but a warping of space-time due to the presence of a massive object, or a gravitational 'field', took him about ten more years to flesh out.

 

Yet there is an undeniable correlation between Einstein's Special Theory of Relativity and Biblical concepts such as the 'eternity' or 'timelessness' of the nature of God, or God's omniscience and the nature of His dwelling or Kingdom:

 

Isaiah 46:9-10 "Remember the former things long past, for I am God, and there is no other; I am God, and there is no one like Me, declaring the end from the beginning, and from ancient times things which have not been done, saying, 'My purpose will be established, and I will accomplish all My good pleasure.”

 

2 Peter 3:8: “But do not let this one fact escape your notice, beloved, that with the Lord one day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years like one day.”

 

Psalm 90:2: “Before the mountains were born or You gave birth to the earth and the world, even from everlasting to everlasting, You are God.”

 

Romans 16:26: “But now is manifested, and by the Scriptures of the prophets, according to the commandment of the eternal God, has been made known to all the nations, leading to obedience of faith.”

 

Isaiah 40:28: “Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Everlasting God, the LORD, the Creator of the ends of the earth Does not become weary or tired His understanding is inscrutable.”

 

1 Corinthians 2:7: “But we speak God's wisdom in a mystery, the hidden wisdom which God predestined before the ages to our glory.”

 

Romans 1:20: “For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes, His eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly seen, being understood through what has been made, so that they are without excuse.”

 

Proverbs 15:3 - “The eyes of the Lord are everywhere, keeping watch on the wicked and the good.”

 

Psalm 33:13 - “From heaven the Lord looks down and sees all mankind; from his dwelling place he watches all who live on earth…”

 

1 Chronicles 28:9 - “…for the Lord searches every heart, and understands every motive behind the thoughts. If you seek him, we will be found by you; but if you forsake him, he will reject you forever.”

 

1 Kings 8:27 : "But will God indeed dwell on the earth? Behold, heaven and the highest heaven cannot contain You, how much less this house which I have built!”

 

Jeremiah 23:24: “Can a man hide himself in hiding places So I do not see him?" declares the LORD "Do I not fill the heavens and the earth?" declares the LORD.”

 

 

And many more...

 

 

In finale, one could reasonably surmise not only that Physics are just as legitimate as Metaphysics, that 'Science' is just as legitimate as what we call 'Spirituality', and that religious/spiritual concepts and beliefs in things like 'Eternity', 'Infinity' and 'Everlasting Life' are just as much a part of 'hard science' observed phenomena as 'Special Relativity', Quantum Physics, and the like. We have seen their effects, no matter which language we use to describe it. And what humans are capable of 'seeing' and 'observing' I believe, doesn't even come close to what ultimate reality actually is in its totality. Thus, as physicists and like-minded people all across God's great Earth continue their search for the Holy Grail of Physics and Quantum Physics: Grand Unified Theory, the Creator of it all is the one who ultimately decides what humankind needs to know and will be granted access to. But nevertheless in the end, all will have been given adequate knowledge and insight, and all will be without excuse.

 

ON AI, THE BURGEONING TECHNOCRACY & ITS PORTENDED ESCHATOLOGICAL IMPLICATIONS

 

 

In 1948, mathematician John Von Neumann theorized the potential existence of a kind of computational machine which would evolve at such a pace as to soon be capable of replicating itself in an exponential mode of systemic upgrade. He postulated that with each new 'replica' of itself, there would be improvements made upon the previous version, and so on, much like we employ in computer science and the creation of hardware and software systems today. This came to be the basis of what we now refer to as “Artificial Intelligence” or more tersely as “AI.” Further, it forms the basis for the portentous idea that there may come a point in human history where the things that we have created, specifically machines, could someday surpass our ability to control them and may thus lead us into a kind of an AI Apocalypse or Armageddon.

 

While I do not personally follow this line of thought, and do not believe that a created thing could ever surpass the limitations inherent in or programmed by their creator(s), there may be some Scriptural precedent or hinting at this kind of eschatological course of events. In Revelation 14-16 we read: “Because of the signs it was given to perform on behalf of the first beast, it deceived those who dwell on the earth, telling them to make an image to the beast that had been wounded by the sword and yet had lived. The second beast was permitted to give breath to the image of the first beast, so that the image could speak and cause all who refused to worship it to be killed. And the second beast required all people small and great, rich and poor, free and slave, to receive a mark on their right hand or on their forehead.”

 

Therefore, it is not entirely out of the realm of possibility that the 'end times' could in some way involve some type of artificial intelligence or machines. After all, idols all throughout the ignominious evolution (or devolution?) of human endeavours have assumed many forms, and have been crafted from many variants of earthly minerals and materiel, thus, why not an idol fashioned of gold, copper, magnesium, iron, zinc, cobalt, nickel and silicon? Indeed, many individuals believe that we are already living in that age as we speak, due to the increasing prevalence and domination of such technology in our modern lives. Thus the questions which arise are: Can the created ever surpass that of its Creator? As stated before, it seems self-evident to me, from a strictly logistical and, indeed, even from a philosophical/existential standpoint, that Artificial Intelligence ever dominating intellectually or functionally over human beings is perhaps possible but highly unlikely. And as first observed by Ada Lovelace, who is credited by most computer scientists as being the first computer programmer, we humans are the ideologues over such inventions and therefore must also be the immediately assumed lords over them.

 

Furthermore, much like many believe that humankind was created in the image of a sovereign Deity, computers and the technological accouterments which both encompass and aid them, were fashioned in our human image. However, the ontological antinomy of the latter statement is this: We may have been fashioned in the image of our Creator, or as traducianists believe, merely in the image of our genetic human ancestors, but we cannot, as in the former credo, become such a sovereign Deity ourselves, lest the fulfillment of this verity of ontological equality completely negate the concept of such a Being in and of itself. Nevertheless, AI will continue to be made within the human imago.

However, while I do not believe that machines or AI could ever insidiously or maliciously dominate over humankind, as any invention by natural extension must possess the limitations inherent in that of its Creator(s), certain human beings are exerting their influence over advanced technology to suit their evil agendas even as we speak. Thus, if AI ever does 'take over' humankind, human beings will undoubtedly be at the helm of said 'machinations'. And yet we must expect that the questions will persist and that not every human soul will remain at rest in the face of Reason and sound Theology. Many will continue to inquire: Can a human being manufacture or implant a "soul" into a machine? What is the soul or a soul if it exists at all?

 

But most of all: What is the essence of that which makes us human, and could an electronic entity ever become incarnate with such an essence? For if a human being could create a cyborg completely in that of its own image, could it ever possess total human status? And if so, wouldn't this then change the very ontological status of this electro-mechanical entity possessing so-called "artificial intelligence" into one possessing authentic human intelligence & sentience and it would be therefore, merely a clone of a pre-existent species? And last but certainly not least, from the epistemological standpoint, is there an inherent demarcation built into the design of our humanity which limits our knowledge, ability & creative, industrial potential? And if there is no such limit inherently imposed upon the human species, and a human being(s) could create a perfect facsimile of itself crafted from metal, minerals and silicon then perhaps this is the “new body” into which we will be changed, "in the twinkling of an eye" into the immaculate imago of our Creator someday?

 

These are all very valid enquiries, most of which may or may not find their edification in this current epoch. Until then, keeping an open-ended discussion related to all issues pertinent to our species and the human condition is key to each our continued industrious, intellectual and spiritual edification process & actualization.

 

C-PTSD & THE ‘MIND’FIELDS WE MUST HEED

I often feel disconnected from my feelings & my experiences. Being a deeply creative & intelligence person, I am grieved by this, & unsettled by this. Yet I also know where it comes from, and it comes from a very good place-a self-preservatory place. Sometimes we must suppress a present response to a disturbing event that happens to us in order to staunch the potential floods of other traumatic past memories from engulfing us, & perhaps leading to no good. This is true especially for survivors of systematic childhood abuse who become afflicted with C-PTSD in our adulthood. (And indeed, even as adults we are “victimized” by others in this way, too). And the quality of our lives is profoundly effected by this condition.

 

Incidentally, this is the main reason why emotional abuse is such an egregious sin to inflict upon another, as the effects are life-lastingly insidious & pernicious. In a word, almost everything that we deign to do must always be regarded as a potential minefield-type situation. Now, mind you, as long as we remain merely “vigilant” rather than paralytically “hyper-vigilant”, we can procure for ourselves some relative measures of peace & fulfillment. Nevertheless, getting back to the subject of emotional constriction & suppression: Whenever we experience a present violation of our person, (& this includes all beings designated as “homo sapiens” & not just those with “C-PTSD” diagnoses) whether that trauma be a physical and/or emotional one, we fear opening up to the full experience of this because we all too keenly recall the dark paths which these same emotions & memories led us onto in our past (even only in a “mindscape” sense). The mind is an amazing & complex organ, but it is also a tricky & potentially dangerous one.

 

In fact, I believe C-PTSD to be a general symptom of the human condition, in many ways. We humans are very vulnerable & complicated creatures. I believe that everyone suffers from C-PTSD in relation to something, in varying degrees of intensity. This life can be brutal & godless at times. So can our fellow man. So can we ourselves, no matter how much we may attempt to “purify-by-rationalization”, our own sins against others-even if they were in “self-defense”. For the most part, I tend to agree with Jean Paul Sartre's assertion that “Hell is others.” Yet, I also concede that others can also help us to experience more “heavenly” things as well at times.

 

Hence, the never-ending dilemma: Should I open myself or not to the full range of my human experience & condition? But the thing is, as author & speaker Brene Brown once keenly observed: We can't be selective about which part of our mind we open & which part stays closed without risking either vulnerability & trauma, or, on the other side of things, anhedonia, & a total inability to feel anything worth feeling. I learned this early on. Relative happiness & its pursuit must come to terms with this verity or risk never fulfilling itself. Then again, quite honestly, some of us have just come to terms with another verity: That of our own nature. I personally have had to accept the fact that I will always be damaged in certain ways, & hence, unable to completely immerse myself into the fullness of what we refer to as a “normal life.” My own mental stability depends upon an acceptance of this. We are what we are. No amount of “self-help” projects or even inward immersion into our own psyche in order to come to know & heal ourselves can get at all of the wounds which we carry deep inside of ourselves.

 

Some things, we must accept, are broken, & cannot be fixed-they can only be worked around to the best of our ability. We cannot undue the damage that was done to us beyond a certain point. But, don't get me wrong, my intention is not fatalism, but realism. What I am saying is that we are who we are for better & for worse, & that we can only try to make the best out of what we have been left with. Because I have witnessed some dark things come out of my wounds, & some miraculous & astoundingly redemptive & beautiful things come out of them.

 

But, it is true that we are what we are, as the saying goes, in relation to the individual past histories which we carry inside of our psyches. Once I was watching a film, and one of the main characters, who was a survivor of abuse said: “I will never be normal because of what they did to me.” I totally connected with that line of dialogue. I feel this every day at least once when I am faced with yet another way in which my condition limits me from being a fully functional human being. Yet for me, as long as I consistently strive to own my own darkness & “brokenness” without inflicting it upon others, I can have peace with myself.

 

So, we all have to find a point of compromise with ourselves, 'cause we can't 'be' it all. And at least now, I have at least come far along enough in my own journey of healing that I no longer internalize others' sins & transgressions like my abusers had “programmed” me to do when I was young. Now I know from deep within my whole being, that I did not deserve their mistreatment, or the damage which they left me with that I, in no way, brought upon my own self. But I believe that we all have a story of survival & trauma to tell, including our abusers, past or present. Yet we all must make the choice as to whether we allow our own private pain & darkness to turn us into a victim, & another transgressor, or into a survivor & another purveyor of the Truth & the Light. It is always totally up to us.

 

Yet unfortunately, our society & culture have a long way to go as far as recognizing psychological acts of violence towards other human beings as equally egregious, & as equally in need of validation on the part of the afflicted. It's funny how whenever you mention “C-PTSD”, most people automatically associate it with military servicemen & women, & the effects of combat in political “physical” wars. And no doubt, this form of it is just as valid, & just as afflictive. Yet survivors of more emotional or psychological kinds of trauma aren't really immediately given clout, when by all rights they absolutely should be. I myself have experienced the way in which some people can view you with either incredulity and/or suspicion when you share with them that you have “C-PTSD”.

 

I understand the aversion, however, to such things, as many people are just afraid to explore their own minds, & perhaps similar experiences with trauma that is emotionally & psychologically based. But I also find this to be a poor excuse for the disparagement of my (or any other person's) human condition & experience merely because they are too afraid to connect with that of their own.

 

Moreover, I think this explains a lot of ills in human society, actually. Individuals who, instead of choosing self-awareness & integration, choose self-deception & depravity. M. Scott Peck's book “The People of the Lie” was indispensable to me on my own journey & I still refer to it from time to time as a guide in how to identify those persons who choose projection of their own shadow onto others instead of accountability & proper governance for & of themselves. But it's not just about identification, but the validation as well, that I had every right to protect myself from my abusers, as they, very clearly were in the wrong.

 

In my own family system, I never had anyone to stand up for me in relation to what was true & right. I played the “role” of the “identified patient”, & in some more emotional ways, the “scapegoat”. If I attempted to assert myself they would quickly put me back into my “place” by either “gaslighting” me or inventing some reason why I “deserved” their mistreatment. Another way they tried to manipulate me back into my “roles” was by taking a personality trait of mine or a character trait & attempting to make me feel ashamed of it, or like I was inferior or inadequate in some way. I believe that one would fall under the category of emotional abuse & “gaslighting”.

 

In finale, as they used to say back in the heyday of the 1970's & 80's self-help boom: “You can either choose to continue the cycle or to stop the cycle”. The legacies which our family system's have left us with may be totally unfair & unjust, but we must make the choice for the latter & not the former if we are to end this cycle of psychological violence so rampant in Western culture & society. Not that I believe that the problem can be “solved”, but I do believe that it can be “improved upon” to a certain degree, person by person. We are all held accountable for our choices, eventually. And we should deem it in no way acceptable to inflict any kind of intentional distress upon our fellow human beings. Mind you, I stressed the word “intentional.” If we would all utilize our emotional trauma in the name of preventing ourselves from becoming just like our abusers, instead of looking for an easy way out of facing ourselves, what a slightly, but nevertheless, safer society we would all dwell in.

 

And as many wise thinkers have noted: What we do to another, we, in turn, do to ourselves, as we were all essentially created with the same psychology, at least in a general “humanistic” sense. Also, I would add to that, what we do to ourselves, ends up also affecting others, for better &/or for worse. We must take this life seriously, & how we engage in it, because in the end, that's all we're left with besides our scars. 'Cause there is no such thing as “Fate”, only Choice & Consequence. And C-PTSD!!! (But at least some things are consistent.)

 

 

 

 

 

CAVEAT TWITTER-OR

“Meaningless, meaningless, meaningless,” said the Tweeter, “everything is meaningless!” In this day of rampant Social Media, many well-intentioned, sensitive & highly intelligent souls feel a certain kind of both ennui & frustration as it relates to its many venues. Indeed, after a few months of Twitter, one most likely would come to a point of suicidal and/or homicidal ideation-a full blown existential crisis, that is. And one's life needn't even be that “empty” to begin with to reach this point. One can also have a well-rounded existence & life & still feel that way after countless marketing strategies posing as “social interactions”. But the thing is, as we used to say, “Ya gotta learn to take the good with the bad,” right? Or, do we?

 

First of all, that adage should say instead “take the bad with the good”, after all no one starts out in any endeavour in life hoping to gain something 'bad' out of it no matter how much a masochist or a self-defeatist one might well be. We all, no matter our level of emotional maturity and/or development, need a certain level of depth & meaningfulness-even, dare I say it-intimacy to be exchanged in our social interactions & so-called “connections.” And I don't mean to conjure up stereotypical images of the “basement hermit” who never interacts with the outside world in any meaningful or responsible way. No, those individuals choose the “virtual world” as a substitute for the outer world. I love the outer world! In healthy doses, of course, as with all things. So, without further ado, let's break this down into smaller, more manageable bits & bytes, of course.

 

(From here on out, I will refer to all Social Media conglomerates as “Twitter” or those who use them regularly (myself included) as “twitterors” under the heading:

TO “TWITTER” OR NOT TO “TWITTER”:

The Pros & Cons

PROS & THEIR SUCCESSIVE CONS

*Provides an alternative way to reconnect with loved ones & friends, etc. that one would not either feel appropriate for other methods or that one would not be able to achieve through other methods.

 

*Of course, the obvious CON to above PRO being that it opens you up to potential negative and indeed, traumatic experiences, rejection, & in general all of the possible vagaries of the human-to-human dialectic. But, the PRO to this CON, if you will, is that you're already well-versed in those kinds of vagaries, so, it can't get any worse, right? (Although, maybe it can...)

 

*Provides a convenient forum through which to browse a wondrously eclectic array of art, literature (including “blogs”), & to learn about other cultures, belief systems, etc. Now, you may be thinking that your public library can & does offer these wonders & amenities for the most part already, but not all from the same monitor, a few clicks of a mouse & some strokes on a keyboard.

 

*The also obvious CON to the aforementioned PRO is that, again, the more we broaden our consciousness, the more vulnerable it is to those “darker principalities” which seek their willing vessels. But, again, the same is true for life before Social Media, right? (Or, is it-at least as prevalently?...)

 

*Provides a way to purchase services &/or goods with a few clicks of a mouse & strokes on a keyboard, & have them delivered to your personal &/or other preferred residence within a relatively convenient period of time.

 

*CON: “Spams” you with a whole bunch of crap (& “people”) that you neither need nor want, thereby making you feel a bit like a piece of marketing meat, or a "punching bag" for some mentally unbalanced & malfeasant individual, thus making you question the whole of its usefulness and even desirability in articles just like this one.

 

*Provides an occasional moment of appreciation &/or connection with another human being that is genuine & deeply meaningful.

 

*CON: Seems to cancel out the aforementioned PRO by being pathologically too scarce & inconsistent with itself. One begins to feel that they are possibly (& definitely unwittingly) in a relationship with an emotionally abusive entity of Artificial Intelligence. (Oh, by the way, I also mean the “humans.” 'Bots, not unlike 'algorithms', are programmed & manned by real, live, morally culpable individuals.)

 

*Provides a raison d'etre through the wonderfully autonomous mediums of blogsites, AuthorPages, LiveJournals, business forums, etc. for those of us who thrive best in those independently-minded & artsy-intellectual kinds of environs.

 

*Caveat Twitter-or. If not balanced with “work” & social connections out in the “concrete” world may turn into the CON of making one feel more disconnected & more existentially null & void than one ever felt before becoming a “twitteror.”

 

*Can provide a way to feel connected.

 

*Makes one feel more dis-connected. (Those two just seem to keep coming up, don't they?)

*Gives one a sense of purpose.

 

*Gives one a sense of insignificance. (Yeah, those two keep popping up, too.)

*Provides a virtual life “supplement” to entertain, enlighten & enliven you when you're not out in the “other” world doing other things.

 

*CON: If taken as the “main course” (in the intellective-emotive gustatory sense, or course) can render one with a potentially fatal case of impoverishment, malnourishment & mental rickets, which may lead to dementia.

 

All in all, we can conclude that: Social Media is meant to be taken "supplementally", not as the "main course." As with all things, balance, right?

 

*Hmmnnnn...what else could possibly be noted about Social Media & its effects/affects. Huh. Yeah, it seems to “affect” us more than it “effects” us, doesn't it-at least in the “eternal”, “metaphysical” sense.

 

Not much more can be said.

 

Because it seems to keep boiling down to same two salient PROS & CONS.

It helps us feel connected, but makes us feel even lonelier than we ever did before its advent.

 

And secondly, it gives us a sense of purpose when we employ ourselves meaningfully within it, but at the same time impoverishes us, existentially, & psycho-spiritually, no matter how “conscientiously” we utilize it.

 

Hence, in finale, I suppose it all boils down to this: Progress has its limitations. We cannot escape the human predicament. In a sense, this revelation has its comforts more than its inflictions.

 

For with this being known, we are free to follow whatever path we choose, knowing now, that it will continue to lead us to the same place, no matter which road we take.

 

Yet, if we are utilizing it properly & responsibly, we will be gaining inward growth & evolution in a positive direction.

 

It also serves to relieve our consciences by reminding us that we are often not even the problem, & thus we need not seek to "fix" it, whatever our current sufferings might be.

 

We must merely accept things as they are.

 

We must merely continue to make the most out of the human condition that we find ourselves in & do the best with what little this world, in the way of true, everlasting sustenance, has to offer.

 

Now that, is all well within our purview.

 

OOPS, I JUST CATHARTED: NOT SILENT & NOT DEADLY

 

 

Cathart-a deep sublimative release of mindly flatulence, if kept silent, very deadly.

 

 

There remains much to be said about the virtues of Sublimation-yes, that's “Sublimation” with a capital “S”. And perhaps it's no etymological coincidence that the word “Art”-yes, that's “Art” with a capital “A”-is perfectly housed within both the words, “fart” & “cathart.” Okay, so I made that last word up for my own amusement. Nevertheless, let us get the pedantic, humour-killing bit out of the way. The word “catharsis”: of Grecian origin, “katharsis” literally, “to purify.” According to the antiquated (1972) yet still rather resourceful dictionary that I happened to have on hand when I wrote this, the first definition given for “catharsis” is: 1. purgation, especially of the bowels. The second is: 2. the purifying of the emotions or relieving of emotional tensions, especially by art: applied originally by Aristotle to the purging of pity or terror by viewing a tragedy. Finally, the third definition given is: 3. Psychiatry: the alleviation of fears, problems & complexes by bringing them to consciousness or giving them expression. Of course, to that last definition I would add “non-violent” or “patently immoral” expression, which brings me to the main impetus behind this little ditty.

 

It is no exaggeration to state that many a times I have reveled in just how many lives (mainly of the homo sapiens variety) have been spared due to the fact that I, by my benevolent & righteous Creator, have been blessed with the gifts of artistic expression in its various guises. And I have often found it amusing-albeit also very annoying-how the current (& indeed, any cultural milieu of any given time in human history), cultural milieu, often pathologizes & demonizes those individuals who happen to be intellectually & creatively endowed among its throngs. Truth be told, we are often not feared & “scapegoated” because of our potential for “insanity” or “violence” being any greater than others, but quite frankly, because we are harbingers of Truth & Light.

 

And of course, without launching into any tedious proselytizing, we live in a world which seems to prefer a comforting-yet potentially detrimental “lie” to a glaring-albeit potentially redeeming “truth.” And these “truths” of which I speak include those “outer” more sectarian truths & those “inner” more privatized truths which many choose to stray from facing.

 

Moreover, & returning to the aforementioned tendency of the “media” to pathologize and/or demonize artists & the like, we not only have cathartic outlets but we regularly (& even religiously) utilize them! Thus, unless you fear the Truth & The Light, we are not the ones to look out for. Yet, having said that, all human persons possess the potential for evil, & commit it in its varying forms from “venial” to “mortal” on a regular basis. And by the way, catharsis also runs on a continuum & can assume many forms-not just “artistic.” One can find release & absolution from their innermost tensions & anxieties in any number of endeavours. Playing a good round of tennis can serve a troubled soul just as well as composing an opera (“opera”-Latin plural for “great work” of any artistic bent).

 

Indeed, even mere introspectivity (Okay, I made that word up, too) in & of itself can prove to be very cathartic. This is why we must, as a human society, continue to encourage the virtues & saving graces of an equably balanced life of both Extroversion & Introversion. Indeed, if one compiled a research compendium of all of the human individuals who have committed what can be deemed gross acts of evil & violence (including “violence” of the “psychological” variety), against other human beings, & conducted a psychological profile on all of them, there would be one salient feature which most would have in common: lack of insight.

 

This is a bit of a “clinician's” term, namely coined & used in the field of Psychiatry to denote a trait of introspective impoverishment demonstrated by a given individual. What I mean by “introspective impoverishment” is simply, to borrow a phrase from Psychiatrist & Author M. Scott Peck, an individual who “resists awareness of their own condition.” Broadly speaking, our society calls such persons “sociopaths”, & on the less “severe” end of the spectrum “narcissists” (although the two are different in some ways). Nevertheless, we can say with the utmost confidence, that “self-reflection” could easily be added to the list of not only “basic human rights” but “basic human needs!”

 

If one is to be & continue to grow into a healthy, wholesome human person, one must be willing to take not only “outward” accountability for oneself, but “inward” accountability for oneself, achieved through what M. Scott Peck once referred to as “crucial self-examination.” Yet sadly, many individuals of great potential flounder, due to their unwillingness to submit themselves to this very task. Indeed these individuals are the ones people should watch out for as they are even more vulnerable to falling prey to evil due to their staunch commitment to such self-deception.

 

Yet in keeping with the less-pedantic & more amusing tone which this piece began wanting to set, there may be many who would consider acts of violence to also fall under the category of being “cathartic.” Perhaps they are right, from a strictly primeval vantage-point, that is. Yes, kidnapping your enemy, stringing them up by the genitals, slowly & systematically torturing them for a few hours before the big dismemberment may be cathartic-it may indeed “exercise” those demons, but will they be “exorcised?” Besides, one must comport oneself, I believe, with a certain modicum of faith in one's own higher intelligence & with a certain contempt for behaving like a rabid animal. How insulted I would be by my own self were I to have murdered that person all of those years ago instead of penning that first novel of literary fiction! Slow doth heal, those wounds which men doth give themselves, as Willy once put it, right? Indeed.

 

Not being able to live with ourselves is usually the deciding factor for most of us who choose civil disobedience & a more artfully cathartic kind of battle with the destructive forces constantly taking up arms against us from within & without. Also, many others would deem the fulfillment of other “baser” urges to be “cathartic” in their own way, namely that of sexual release. Yes, this may be an 'urge' which many consider to be an intractable aspect of the human condition & experience, but I consider “catharsis” to be more aptly used when describing deeper, more internalized, psychospiritual phenomenon in occurrence. The bottom line is, when one is employing the finer art of sublimation, one should aim to transcend something, right? Otherwise, the main heft of the act goes right out the window.

 

I suppose I do tend to be one of those purists. Thus, my preferential use of catharsis usually has a higher goal in mind regarding something spiritual more than purely carnal. Indeed, I see the act of catharsis as existing for the sole purpose of not only mere psychological relief, but of the slow but sure mastery of soul-smithing, to borrow a phrase from T.S. Elliot, &, to borrow another keen phrase from Mr. C.G. Jung, “psycho-spiritual” edification. After all, I want to be able to say, without undue embarrassment, upon completion of the aforementioned act, “Oops I just catharted. But this one's no longer silent, or deadly.”

 

ON SO-CALLED MENTAL ‘ILLNESS’ AND DISORDERS

In our culture & society, many times people and things get demonized and pathologized that, in fact, should be credited for the pathologies which they actually prevented from developing in an individual had they not employed such psychological defense mechanisms. I personally am a survivor of systematic childhood emotional abuse which has continued at the hands of a larger society even (and oftentimes especially) as an adult. When I was younger, being the designated 'black sheep/scapegoat/'identified patient' of my dysfunctional and abusive family system, I was 'diagnosed' with many psychiatric conditions. I have pretty much been 'labeled' with everything in the DSM-IV.

 

However, looking back, and after having healed a bit from the wounds such labeling inflicted upon me, I realize fully now that what they needed to keep at arm's length (so as not to identify) by pathologizing and/or demonizing, were actually what not only saved my physical life but my emotional, mental and spiritual one as well. Had I not been 'schizoidal' in the ways that I was, had I not been bi-polar in the ways that I was, had I not been 'paranoid' and depressed and socially withdrawn in the ways that I often was, I would not have survived as intact as I did. Period.

 

In fact, what gets labeled as a 'Disorder' is actually a psycho-spiritual symptom of an intense internal conflict that we are experiencing as we are attempting to establish a moral 'order' from without ourselves and 'without' in our interactions with others. We have made some strides in our society concerning the enlightenment about such issues, but there is one constant that will always push against this: the tendency of some types of people to resist self-awareness out of fear. It took me many years and much inner soul work on myself before I finally realized, without just internalizing it, that whenever others treated me in a patronizing, dismissive or otherwise condescending manner regarding my healthy and well-developed sense of self-awareness and my honesty in sharing my story, it is only due to their fear of tapping into their own trauma and their own inner, private Hades.

 

Oftentimes, we will hear people say things mindlessly like: “Oh, but they probably just don't understand. You have to forgive them for that.” Yet I think that they very much do understand, and that is why they are behaving in the way that they are. The truth is, every human individual suffers from some 'trauma' of some variation. And the truth is also, that all human persons are fundamentally, and in a philosophical sense, similar enough to warrant treating one another with dignity and respect. I may not be able to completely empathize with what someone else has gone through, but I can, when examining my own life experiences, garner enough empathy to be careful not to dismiss or further wound the person revealing their vulnerability to me. We must be part of the solution, as individuals, by taking responsibility for that of our own healing process, so that we 'stop the cycle' of wounding and at least, in our own small but significant way, lift one another up instead of tearing one another down.

 

May we therefore let our words heal and not wound, may we therefore let our own wounds give us the strength and compassion to fight our own demons, so that we can be fully ready and available to help others do the same. When it all comes down to it, we cannot judge people by the defense mechanisms which they employ in order to prevent themselves from falling into greater evil. Rather, we should evaluate one another only upon how we treat other human beings despite that of our own sufferings and afflictions. After all, even our Lord Jesus Christ said, “It is not what goes into a man that makes him unclean, but what comes out of him.” (Matthew 15:11)

 

 

 

 

ON SUICIDE

Although society today in comparison to erstwhile attitudes, does seem to be a little more enlightened concerning mental health issues and issues concerning the general philosophical and theological 'problem of human evil', we still have a long way to go. One concern in particular that I will be addressing in this article, is on feelings of suicidality and their concomitant expression to others, and how others often re-traumatize us even more so with their reactions. About a year ago, I was attending a church in my area, and had the misfortune of being covertly abused, and then 'triggered', which eventually led to an emotional reaction on my part to this abuse that was occurring, whereby I (mistakenly) revealed to the people present in this group setting, that I had been feeling suicidal due to some stressors in my life that I was facing at that time.

 

And although my reaction was mainly due to the C-PTSD that I grapple with due to having survived systematic child and teenage-hood emotional abuse, which often brings us right back to where we have felt before, and I probably would not have acted upon it as I was now much further along in my recovery process, I also expressed these inner thoughts and feelings to them mainly to drive across the point to my abusers just how much their behaviour towards me was affecting me and the egregiousness and seriousness of their mistreatment of others truly is. To make a long story short, the police ended up being contacted, and my abusers merely re-traumatized me all over again. I do not think they realize just how deeply they disturbed and distressed me by their actions. For about the next two weeks, I was again cast back into a C-PTSD hell that only those who have been real with themselves about the evil that they see and have experienced themselves in this world will be able to admit to.

 

But sadly and disturbingly, there are many people who, as M. Scott Peck brilliantly summed it up in his book, “The People of the Lie”, “resist awareness of their own condition.” Self-reflection and honesty are definite virtues of a seemingly lost era, where the measure of a man was found not in his 'net worth' or in his 'public persona' but in his actual moral integrity and inward character. Furthermore, this way that certain types of people choose to respond to those who express any kind of humanity or honesty or vulnerability still to this day borders on 'civil' savagery. And, to add insult to injury, these people who did this to me at this church, then had the audacity to get me to agree with them that what they had done was 'understandable' considering what I had shared with them. But I think they were merely resentful of me for having stood up to them and called out their abuse for what it was.

 

Nevertheless, I humored them and went along with it just to safely extricate myself from the situation. After all, they had already demonstrated that they could not be trusted, and were, in fact, malfeasant and morally bereft individuals devoid of any authentic spiritual or emotional maturity. In truth, when people call the police on individuals who are sharing their feelings of despair and hopelessness, this is an act of abuse, and an act of criminalizing sufferers and their rightful feelings. This is NOT the proper or even honest, healthy or effective way to handle these situations! Yet the sad fact is, that evil and willfully ignorant people do exist. Wicked people who refuse to own their own humanity and self-same feelings, instead 'scapegoating' those individuals who have both the courage and the love and respect for themselves and others to be honest and authentic, do exist. And those who refuse to continue the cycle of abuse and psychological violence towards ourselves and our fellow human beings will run into them quite often along our journey.

 

Yet I have taught myself to see these kinds of people as a contrasting example of who I do NOT want to become as a person, and who I have chosen to allow the Lord to mold me into both despite and BECAUSE of the hell that I have known and the evil and darkness that I have witnessed and experienced. So, without them to provide this counterbalance, I may not be the person that I am today, and I thank God for creating a world with both good, God-fearing and loving people in it, as well as a world with depraved, malignantly narcissistic and character-disordered people in it.

 

Without the bad, we could not develop or appreciate the good. And without a descension or two to Hades, I would have never learned to reach for Heaven. And without being forced to look the devil and his horrors straight in the face, I would have never found my place in the arms of my Heavenly Father. Without taking that inward sojourn into my own truth, I never would have found the profound resiliency, peace, joy and abiding fulfillment that I have in serving the Lord and in serving others. And, on top of that, I never would have found my true identity, a child of God, and would have allowed my abusers to triumph-and worse yet, evil to triumph by becoming yet another 'flying monkey' for its circus of human cowardice, trickery, torment and malice. And those who re-scourge our wounds may think they have won the battle, but they haven't won the war-not with this seasoned Veteran of the Lord's Army. For the sword of Truth and the breastplate of righteousness are more finely honed and staunch than any of the devil's weaponry.

 

Moreover, my own personal experience, most people who take their own lives are not acting merely out of some pitiable feeling of hopelessness and victimhood. And neither are they acting out of malevolent and/or cowardly self-centeredness. On the contrary, the motivation behind why people attempt and/or succeed at suicide is highly moralistic and altruistic. We are either responding to an act and/or acts that we have committed in the past and/or that we fear we are on the verge of committing in the present. In a word, some people are driven by a very acute sense of moralism and concern for their fellow man, because they sense an impending evil about to consume them and manifest in their behaviour.

 

In a sense, we truly believe in those dark nights of the soul, that we are a danger to others and ourselves, and that the best course of action to take is suicide. The last suicide attempt that I made, I was motivated mainly by the acute awareness and hypervigilance, born out of being a survivor of systematic childhood emotional abuse and the C-PTSD that I was as of then undiagnosed with, of my own vulnerability to the evil in the world in the state that I was in. In my mind, I had vowed to never allow others with ill-intent to have that much control over me again. I saw no choice but to take my own life by my own hand, rather than allow society to slowly and systematically murder me in a more existential and psycho-spiritual sense day by day.

 

Now I recognize, having been properly self-diagnosed, that this was a feature of my C-PTSD and the deprogramming, reprogramming and healing process that I was going through. Yet a lot of people fail to dig deep enough inside of their own private pain and darkness to be able to understand the true motivation behind why anyone would take their own life. The bottom line is, it's nobody else's business but God's. Only He truly knows what we struggle with. I do believe that we will face a loss of reward should we ever take our own life, but for those who are truly reborn again and remained firm until the end (even though they created their own 'end'), they will not be eternally condemned.

 

NIHILISM: AN UNORTHODOX MESSIAH

What is it about the darkness that makes me feel so at home? Or perhaps, what is it about me? Why are we so crippled by the contradictory commands of our day? Or perhaps they are crippling due to our aching need and hope for the absence of such trilemma and the ruthless dictatorships forged in their place. For whatever nature of orders we are given, we respond with thrice more, thinking that any authority not granted to us, is that means by which we need even more follow our own dictates.

 

Obeisance requires its own massive stores of energy. Yet in the scheme of human affairs, we are left with nothing, making revolt disappointingly chronic albeit soon quite dull and arbitrary. So, how to give it up without giving up? Life and its success or failure is directly commensurate with a trick of constant measure, whose scale’s units read like some dyslexic, cryptic codex, more being less, less being more and still, the space in between, determining fortune or catastrophe. For in Truth, equitability is an abomination, a perversity of those fallible yet malleable phenomena of human vitiation and imaginings.

 

Ah, what terrible webs our minds do weave, when first we practice to believe, for belief is but the portent of assured repudiation. Thus perhaps only the nihilists of any culture are christened for true greatness, as they leave room for that endless epiphanous redemption which cannot be preened from the snares of all definitive “knowing.” For they are of quite another kind of mind, as they know all too wisely to coddle objective indifference & to search fruitlessly for neither question nor answer.

 

Thus do they find, in their aimlessness, direction and resolve, in their wealth of despair, can they buy out the indigence of careless ignorance, finding true exultation. For the nihilist, through his flagrant apostasy, finds salvation, and through his humble agnosticism, comes closest to God. And yet he finds with such abundance, because he does not seek. For Truth is already here, there and everywhere.

 

And when man seeks for that which he has never lost, loss of Truth finds him, blinding him with cataclysmic and paralytic grief for the rest of his days. And the more he tries to remember, the more he slowly & painfully forgets. And it is past this point that he, the zealous believer, has become his much dreaded world-without-meaning. Implosion occurs in nauseatingly infinite syncopation & with stunning reverberation, and neither the deepest sea of longing nor the highest lofts of asomatous aspiration can offer any reprieve. And one day, the only thing left to save him from complete annihilation, will prove to be the crafty but wise counsel of the nihilist.

 

 

 

DO ALL DOGS GO TO HEAVEN?

A BRIEF EXEGESIS ON THE IMMORTALITY OF ANIMALIAN SOULS

 

 

Many have often wondered whether or not animals have souls. In the Bible it does not specifically say that God breathed life into one animal or even plant. However, in man’s case it does declare in Genesis 2:7 that “… the Lord God formed man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being.” In some other versions of the Bible the words, “spirit” or “soul” are replaced for “being,” but at least man having a soul or being or spirit come directly from God Himself, is not in question. It also states earlier in Genesis 1:26 and in verse 27 that “Then God said, ‘Let us make man in our image, in our likeness, and let them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the livestock, over all the earth, and over all the creatures that move along the ground.’ So God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.”

 

Off note, verse 27 also answers the question of female humans being, in God’s eyes, just as equal as the male human being. So, from these three verses taken from Genesis, we can conclude that both the male and female person were granted the life of the Spirit, which is that of their Creator, God. However, in Genesis 3:14, it strongly suggests that, although God did not breathe life directly into any one animal or anything else of His creation, these creatures still have a direct connection with and towards their Creator, God. For God “…said or spake to the serpent…” Yet this does not answer fully the question of whether or not animals or any of God’s creation other than us, have a soul, or in other words, will take any part in the afterlife.

Furthermore, there are specifically two other places in the Bible where this question is partially answered. The third place is contained within, again, an Old Testament scripture to be found in Genesis 9:3. In this scripture, God grants to Noah and all humankind “…every living creature that breathes and moves…” for food. And it is important to note that it does use the word “every” living creature, therefore not excluding any creature from the serpent to the tiger to be appropriate and edible as a source of food for man, child and woman. And I suppose that even insects and other reptilian creatures would have been included in this feastful menu. So, for humor’s sake, John the Baptist probably wasn't chastened, for his taste for honey and locusts!

 

All throughout most of the Old Testament it does speak of not eating any meat from an animal or creature which still has its lifeblood in it. But the serious implications of a punishment wrought from this moral abomination in God’s eyes, was compensated for or “fulfilled” by the life, crucifixion and completion of all sacrificial and otherwise rituals, in the death and resurrection of the Lamb Jesus Christ in the New Testament. This means, simply that we no longer need to use the lifeblood of any animal as atonement for our sins. Out with the old, in came the new covenant. But this subject is, I suppose fodder for another essay.

 

In continuum, the fourth scripture which deals with the spirit of the animal vs. that of man and woman comes into play also in Genesis 9:5, where God speaks to Noah, “And for your lifeblood I will surely demand an accounting, I will demand an accounting from (and “from” is the key word here) every animal. And from each man, too, I will demand an accounting for the life of his fellow man.” Now, let’s stop here and conclude that animals, contrary to post-Darwinian sentiment, do not kill merely out of “instinct” without any wrongdoing actually having been done. For God clearly states here that animals, too, are to be held accountable for any killing of any man.

 

And having a master presupposes generally, that not only is the person or animal accountable to this master and inferior to this master, but also where there is an “accounting” there is also something wrong or “bad” to be accounted for. In other words, animals must eat not unlike us to survive, but any killing not directly done out of this basic survival need for feed is not a completely justified act whether it be by man or beast. But this scripture may suggest that animals do have souls, since they must answer to their God much like we must.

In addition, and on a side note, in the part of scripture Genesis 9:5, where God says that man will also be held accountable for any killing or lifeblood shed in regards to his fellow humans, we can conclude that God finds any deliberate taking of the life of another human being wrong. Now, philosophically speaking, some believe it to be okay to kill another human being as long as one is protecting or preserving one’s own life and/or the lives of others in the process. But in this case, that would not be premeditated but would be more instinctual & reflexive. The main premise is that to not do so would be not honouring & valuing your own life or those of others. However, I don’t think one should “aim to kill” but should instead aim to “maim” in these instances. Mainly because we do not possess God's omniscience into that person(s) character or life circumstances.

 

In other words, one does not have to shoot one in the heart or the prefrontal cortex to render a person no longer a danger to oneself and/or others. Although, this does sometimes, out of reflexive action, happen. But this gray area becomes quite white and clear in Genesis 9:6 where God says, “Whosoever sheds the blood of man, by man shall his blood be shed; for in the image of God has God made man.” Without straying too far from the main thesis of this essay, the first part of the scripture is not to condone what we call today in the West, “capital punishment”, although this may be necessary in some cases. My understanding of this scripture means that in killing another person, I will naturally be gaining a lot of individuals who will want to do the same to me and who may succeed in doing so. Revenge or vengeance is a part of our natural desire, but it is a sinful desire that does not come from God. As we often say, however, what goes around comes around-even if not from our own hand.

In finale, getting back to the question of whether or not animals have spirits, or rather, have the spirit of their Creator within them much as we do, the fifth scripture is to be found in Ecclesiastes 3:18-21. In this scripture, the teacher, Son of David, King of Jerusalem pontificates rather brilliantly, “I also thought, ‘As for men, God tests them so that they may see that they are like the animals. Man’s fate is like that of the animals; the same fate awaits them both: As one dies, so dies the other.” And it goes on, “All have the same breath (in the footnote it says “or spirit”), man has no advantage over the animal. Everything is meaningless. All go to the same place; all come from dust and to dust all will return.”

 

Most significantly we have verse 21 where the teacher ponders, “Who knows if the spirit of man rises upward and the spirit of the animal goes down into the earth?” As for the first part of the verses, where he says God tests us “to see that we are just like the animals,” the only thing we can conclude this to mean is stated in the second part which is that everything will die eventually, and even the earth itself has a limited span of life. He also did not mean that we are held any less accountable for what we like to endear as our “instinctual” or “animalistic” drives because we are like the animals.

 

Now, as for our last verse, verse 21, we are still left questioning, but this concludes that, although we are creations of the same God and we as humans were given dominion over all, that we must also not forget to forgo some of this control, for we are also, after all, mortal and ruled over by and accountable to a superior being, God. Thus we must live our lives as such, respecting our place in the order of God’s wondrous universe, while also respecting the places of all others as well. For the one who is granted the most power and capability, in the end, will also be held most accountable.

 

BETWEEN REASON & FAITH

 

 

Why do I believe Judeo-Christianity to be the one true Religion?

 

Judeo-Christianity is the only system of worship which requires complete submission of one's will & life over to the will & laws of God alone.

 

All other philosophies & religions have at their core, an egocentric, escapist &/or hedonistic aim.

 

I also believe in Judeo-Christian Scripture as the ultimate source of all wisdom, earthly & metaphysical.

 

This has been tested through the application of Judeo-Christian Scriptures to my own life & journey, & I have found it thus far to be consistently inerrant.

 

Moreover, contrary to the almost militant Manichean paradigm still so prevalent in Western thought, one can be both systematic-minded & spiritually-minded as well.

 

A cultivation of both Intellect & Spirit is not only possible, but is necessary towards achieving a full & authentic sense of faith & understanding.

 

Intelligence & Spirituality are not mutually exclusive phenomena, but are complementary.

 

As for the Augustinian postulate of "fides ante intellectum” (faith before understanding), I propose that such things must not necessarily proceed in this order.

 

Sometimes, in the process of cultivating one's intellectual comprehension of something, one also finds faith and/or “higher understanding”, otherwise known as “wisdom”.

 

Thus, we can proceed adequately from either a stance of "fides ante intellectum" or "fides post intellectum" (faith after understanding).

 

Although it is true, from an ontological standpoint that one's intellectual understanding of “spirituality” or of the metaphysical may indeed be quickened by the precedence of faith, just as one's faith can be quickened during the intellectual syntheses of theological inquiries & edification, let us just assume, from “analogia entis” (an analogy from being) that it is inherent in human nature itself to possess a general thirst for truth & understanding as well as a desire for faith (higher wisdom) as both a mentor & a consolation.

 

In finale, Judeo-Christianity holds each and every one of us fully accountable and manages to achieve a rare & perfect synthesis of Faith and Reason. This is why I find it to be both most challenging, as well as compelling regarding its relevance & legitimacy.

THE MYTH OF COLLECTIVISM

 

 

It is often assumed by the more conformant members of any society, that the collective as placed before the individual, is of a higher moral order. And while traditionalism, in itself, does perhaps initially seek a higher moral imperative just as non-traditionalism does, the latter approach is, in the end, more holistic and sound. The issue with blind obeisance and conformity is that it fails to employ, as a kind of psycho-spiritual tool, the necessary resistance to the very system which it supports; a system that is inevitably ill-fated to transmogrify into its moral opposite in the face of human turpitude and lassitude.

 

Swiss philosopher and psychoanalyst Carl Jung once defined individuation as the end result of the strivings of the individual's own need to more authentically actualise itself in the face of oppressive collectivism. It is, in a sense, a psychic collection of 'scars', skills and revelations acquired in the struggle for self-mastery and fulfillment. Further, assuming that the 'individuated' and more 'actuated' self should naturally have more to contribute to society as a whole and not less, and in a much healthier and efficacious way, the latter approach of individuation over conformity more comprehensively addresses the moralistic gravitas and ethos of each individual's higher calling and needs as well as those of the society they dwell in.

 

Furthermore, concerning the current taxonomy of speciation, every human being is, when all is seen not only as is, but as it is enacted upon by the 'external' world, their own species. Moreover, the same could probably be safely deduced about most forms of life on earth. But this especially applies to human beings, as we are all each so uniquely calibrated & so complex and ever-evolving, both philosophically speaking and physiologically speaking, especially on a 'quantum' or subatomic level. To be fair, taxonomical systems serve their attendant purposes, most of which are well-intentioned. Nevertheless, this can very quickly devolve into a kind of reductionism and myopia which, in turn, can do more harm than good, particularly on a humanistic & moralistic level.

 

Furthermore, let's explore the 'dark underbelly of the beast' known as blind conformity. During many dark periods of human history, many individuals, full of malice and motivated by all sorts of reprobate and evil ideologies, have caused unimaginable suffering to the human race, all rationalized and indeed, even championed, under the guise of nationalistic, religious or otherwise general communal 'solidarity'. And as Oscar Wilde once observed “Patriotism is a virtue of the vicious.”

 

Although I personally think the word “nationalism” to be more apt, what he was getting at was, that the 'majority rule' does not preclude a system of moralistic checks and balances which needs to be operant in order to ensure less abuses of power. In fact, many would surmise that, the more people who seem to be blindly and vigorously jumping on the bandwagon about something, the less likely what they are supporting is both rationally and/or morally sound. Thus, bringing me to my main point concerning blind conformity as an inadequate and actually sinful substitute for individuation.

 

The main ways that blind conformity contributes to more evil rather than good in society is that it interferes with the mental, emotional, spiritual, social and vocational health, genuine self-esteem & wholeness of each person who adheres to it. Societal evils such as physical, sexual and mental/emotional abuse, especially of children become prevalent. Many do not see the connection between this, but I guarantee you, there absolutely is. One's own personal accountability for one's own life trajectory are essential to each our own ability to proceed in a positive and pro-social manner towards psycho-spiritual growth and functionality.

 

Moreover, many character disturbances and disorders are both directly and indirectly the result of neglect of one's own spiritual, moral and general existential responsibilities to the collective & the individual. Moreover, a daily application and practice of self-reflection and examination are moralistically imperative towards the proper development of our innermost being and character.

 

In essence, we must first 'Know thyself,' if we are to be able to contribute in any healthy and robust way to those persons and causes whose paths we will cross and whose tasks we shall undergo out in society. After all, the world is so much better off and much more interesting and challenging with each our own truest selves being deployed in it! And although this journey can be frightening and arduous more often than not, at least we have paved the way for the next brave soul who follows in our footsteps on their own path to self-actualization. Thus, we can see how the striving for self-actualization and individuation enables us to be the best that we can be both for ourselves and for others. For every person who chooses the long, hard and often lonesome road of inner truth, that many more choose the wide and smooth road of blind conformity, and the world does suffer for it.

 

Furthermore, applying a taxonomically inductive solipsism, if you will, no matter the similarities which may exist between two human individuals, these similarities are almost so generic and ambiguous as to be rendered superficial and moot. Because ultimately, we live in a world which thwarts vigorous individuation & actualization at every impasse. I have often found it amusing how Western culture is referred to as “Individualistic”. In truth, conformity & mediocrity, or the status quo is encouraged and even coercively enforced. And perhaps the illusory concept of & the almost militant adhesion to “The Collective”, is an ersatz manifestation of this. To be sure, on the surface, a ruggedly individualistic “Marlboro Man” persona is encouraged, especially amongst the male human population, but upon further analysis, this is just that: an illusion & a persona.

 

That is to say, that genuine & robust individualism or individuation, to borrow a Jungian term, whenever people attempt it, is not only met with suspicion, but often outright contempt, hostility & interference. And this is truly a travesty of epic proportions. Because this not only effects the individual in very deleterious & profound ways, but also adversely impacts the larger collective from achieving upward psycho-spiritual mobility. It hinders collective health & vigour by engaging in oppression dynamics which prevent individual persons from being able to excavate & employ the skills & talents which only they can offer in the precisely calibrated & configured manner which only they can.

 

Moreover, all organisms thrive in the right environment. And many who take up the cross of individuating themselves find to their chagrin & abiding existential angst, that no 'room at the inn' will probably ever be extended to them on a less than contingent basis. And so they must somehow become almost existential vigilantes in constant pursuit of the plunderers & pillagers of their own rightful dues & lot in life. Yet this soon exacts from them, more energial reserves than they have to spend. For they truly need to learn how to not devote such time & energy trying to get others who oppress them, to become enlightened in all of the ways that they, themselves, have become awakened. Instead, they hopefully learn how to cull all of their resources, both inward & outward, in order to carve out their own niche no matter how long it may take.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

BY THE LIGHT OF THE DARKNESS

 

The more we try to hide from ourselves and others, the more translucently we are revealed. When we are at our most enlightened is when we are floundering in the dark, and a light switches on without warning, illuminating the damp, dark, festering crevices of the duality-bound human entity. The heart always bleeds while the modern day mind knows not. But the heart determines all and thus must the neoteric mind surrender to the workings & ministrations of the Spirit, if the heart is to reign pure. For all good things take root in preponderance & deep contemplation, as all things venal take root in haste. Delusions do often serve their purpose, but must be clung to only at the pricey cost of Truth, at the cost of Grace, Absolution & ultimately, that Redemption Eternal.

 

 

 

 

LET THE HAND THAT WAS WOUNDED BECOME THE HAND THAT HEALS

Preface: I share this, along with all of my other works in the hopes that, despite my 'dysfunctions' and pathologies, I can share a little light & Truth with my fellow human beings, & help even if just one person, to feel a little less alone, a little less hopeless, a little less weary.

 

 

Most relationships for me are brief. But as long as I learn something valuable about myself, I have not completely wasted my time. In fact, that pretty much sums up my philosophy on relationships. They are there not only to quell our ennui, but to aid in our growth, both intrapersonally and interpersonally. A recent fallout in a personal relationship of mine has helped me to realize something more fully about myself, and I am immensely grateful for this experience for illuminating this for me. I am incapable of sustaining relationships. Not merely “unwilling”, or “just not ready yet”-I am incapable. Others sometimes console me by saying, “Maybe you just haven't met the right person yet.” And I appreciate their kindness, but my kind values truth over kindness, namely honesty with myself. And I know myself very well. I have neither the desire nor the need to delude myself about anything and am a strong individual with no tolerance for abuse or lowering my standards. My earliest parental relationships have molded me, as they have all of us, into a certain kind of person, both for better and for worse. And one of my disabilities, or dysfunctions as a person is the inability to sustain long-term relationships. It is just a part of who I am.

 

Although, all hope is never lost, for I have taught myself how to work around my limitations, and have emerged an even stronger, and more capacitated animal than I ever could have been without them. And that is the beauty of adaptation, of course, the kind of a more metaphysical, psycho-spiritual sort. Nevertheless, I have also had to make personal sacrifices in order to assume the responsibility of someone who has no business being involved in long-term relationships with others. I just simply do more harm than good whenever I try to let myself have these sorts of things. I will not become the kind of monster that my insides want me to be. Mind you, within every child of God, also lies a saint, but I must keep the other at bay if I am to devote myself to the pursuit of Truth & Light & Virtue. I have had to assume upon myself the cloak of lonerhood, if you will, to protect others from my sort of pathology. Psychiatry has designated my particular condition as: C-PTSD and Schizotypal Personality Disorder.

 

Schizotypal Personality Disorder is often thought to be something other than what real & often quite psychologically healthy & very sane people who live with it experience it as. The best definition of it that I have read, is that it is an inability to sustain long-term relationships due to having experienced early home environments that were systematically abusive and traumatic in some way. It is classifiable, in part at least, under the category of Reactive-Attachment Disorders. Nevertheless, despite my “disorders” (and we all have at least one of these) I chose to commit myself to a social life philosophy whereby any sacrifice which spares others the horrors, and the afflictions of that which was done unto me, is well-worth any loneliness, or existential dissonance which I experience as a part of being my particular kind of beast. Many assume that those who isolate themselves must do so out of a fear of being hurt by others. In some cases, yes, this is so. But in my particular case, I abdicate my throne of commonly accepted and practiced social rituals, etc, in order to protect others from being damaged by me.

 

That whole concept of 'normalcy' is actually just a kind of fantasy for me that I play around with every now & then. I know that is not a scenario that I could actually and successfully thrive or survive within. It's just not who I am or ever could pretend to be for very long. I just simply cannot bear the sight and the thought of hurting other people, when it is within my power to protect them from those broken and dark parts of myself by remaining with them only for a short while. Perhaps that is one of the motives behind God the Father's directive to His Son Jesus Christ to remain with his people only for a perfectly-timed duration. Anything or anyone exposed to the ravages of this evil world for long enough, will cause even what is good to turn bad.

 

And then I think: “But does that mean that I should completely deny myself the same creaturely comforts such as marriage, etc.?” Well, I have already explored that one many a times, and it simply does not change who and what I am. I can only go so far in relationships. Period. I have tried that whole fantasy of normalcy on for size. It it is just not who I could ever be. I accept myself for all that I am. I've never been one to have a deficiency in that, at least. To all creatures, great and small, Our Creator grants, our compensations. Because eventually, through enough trials and error (yes, that “s” on “trials” was deliberate), we come to realize that, beyond the myth of self-improvement lies only, self-acceptance.

 

Yet we must also not forget to embrace our brokenness, to embrace our wounds, for therein, lies our gift(s). We are all damaged. And in some cases, we are just simply, damaged-beyond-repair. Yet though the hand which heals is often the hand which wounds, the hand which wounds must also be given a chance to be the hand that heals. Thus shall I remain, despite my failings with my fellow human beings, willing to at least try-for as long as my nature will allow me. But, don't get too attached. It’s for your own good.

 

TRULY, WHAT IS ‘SANITY’ AND WHAT IS ‘INSANITY’?

Sometimes the ones running the asylum are the true psychopaths.

-V.L.S.

There are many misguided and, indeed, harmful ideas floating around out there about the subject of 'sanity' vs. 'insanity'. The first and most commonly shared 'folie a deux or trois...etc.' (and this is a true form of 'insanity'-I'll expound later), is that any sign of creativity or display of strong emotion is a sign of emotional/mental instability and indeed, even turpitude. I personally have always found this to be an ironic notion, considering the fact that, artistic expression in and of itself, is a direct (and indirect) sublimative outlet for staving off that very thing!

 

Namely, I was always a highly creative and intellectually-inclined person mainly due to the fact that I was trying to preserve my so-called 'sanity' in the very face of evils in this world which truly deserve such an assignation! Another thing I noticed is how certain behaviours, and personality and/or character traits or qualities which society glorifies and accepts in children, become pathologised and even demonised in adults. For example, let's say there is a child carrying on an animated conversation with another person and/or persons whom we might not be able to 'see', but that the child interacts with as if they are 'there' in both an emotional sense and a physical sense.

 

Then, we say, “Oh, how nice. They have an imaginary friend.” And that's that. It is accepted as 'normal' and even a kind of 'milestone' of childhood and we move on and let them be. However, imagine that this person in the above scenario is an adult person, carrying on an animated conversation with someone that they may 'sense' but that we cannot. Then too often that person is either assumed to be crazy, dangerous or 'retarded' or 'challenged' in some way or all of the above and in most cases, is treated in such a derogatory, demoralizing, condescending and hurtful manner.

 

Yet most people who commit acts of violence, be they physical, sexual or of the more insidious, covert and psychological/emotional variation, fail to properly engage in more constructive and/or creative outlets for their inner tensions and anxieties and choose to instead use others as 'identified patients' and 'scapegoats' for their own projected evils. After all, how many artists and intellectuals can truly be said to be 'crazy', when these are, in most cases, some of the most conscientious and tough-minded individuals we will ever meet-not to mention the most interesting, genuine and empathetic.

 

Furthermore, there is another misconception concerning 'sanity' vs. 'insanity', and who's who and what's what. In law they use a term called the 'insanity defense' in some criminal cases to determine whether or not an individual can be legally held accountable for their own actions. Then, there is something termed, 'moral insanity', which, while not a purely legalistic term and definition, is rather, a philosophical one. In fact, the denotative definition of moral insanity allows for certain sinister character qualities to be present in an individual without the accompanying intellectual impairments, as is assumed in the 'insanity defense.'

 

The earliest usage of this term, 'moral insanity' was in a treatise written by James Cowles Prichard in 1835. Furthermore, the M'Naghten Rules of 1842 established the distinction between 'legal insanity' and 'moral insanity', whereby the former required a manifestation of some sort of delusions or affective and/or reasoning impairments. In my view, the only true form of 'insanity' is moral insanity, or as we theologians and laymen alike refer to as the 'original sin human nature.' Personally, although this form of character disorder and deviation may not meet 'legalistic' definitions of true 'insanity', the deleterious effects inflicted upon its victims is nevertheless quite 'maddening'.

 

Thus, without dispensing of the term moral 'insanity' let's just assume this form of 'madness' to be, albeit in a league of its own, nevertheless a mark of a very disordered, disturbed and diseased mind indeed. Moreover, these individuals whom we would deem today as suffering from 'personality' and character 'disorders', are very much accountable for the untold and long-lasting damage that their abuses and exploitations cause to their 'victims/survivors.'

 

However the 'insanity' inherently assumed in my designation of 'true' insanity refers mainly to the gross distortions of moral truth and order which this kind of human evil contributes to and even, champions. Judeo-Christian Scripture refers to this as “the lawlessness of sin.”(1 John 3:4: “Everyone who practices sin also practices lawlessness; and sin is lawlessness.”) And although these individuals cannot rightfully claim the 'insanity defense', the confusion, chaos and senselessness which they contribute to in the world is plain for all to see.

 

Yes, ladies and gents, oftentimes the ones running the 'asylum', are the true lunatics and sociopaths. Now that's truly insane. But we survivors can console ourselves with the fact that the 'scapegoats' are the ones who are set free in the end. And that’s justice wrought by the Most High Author & Prince of Peace and not discord, and perfect order and not chaos. For true ‘sanity’ is determined not only by the soundness of one’s mind, but by the deepest motives of one’s heart.

 

THE EXISTENTIAL STRAW MAN CRISIS

 

 

So many people create all of these distractionary 'fake problems' in order to not have to deal with the REAL ones. It is, in essence, a kind of existential straw man situation. Look at all of the so-called 'Reality-TV' shows there are out there right now! Because it is, in fact, a subverted and mostly fabricated 'reality.' Furthermore, this human tendency & phenomenon extends unfortunately into socio-political arenas as well. It is mostly on a subconscious level when it is being done, but can be deleterious nevertheless, when people are diverting attention & resources towards everything BUT those issues which need to be individually addressed.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

ALL GOOD THINGS

 

 

 

God never doles out anything that has not been earned. The devil, on the other hand offers up worldly delights and rewards with nefarious ease.

 

To start, discernment is granted only to those who have tested things and held onto the good.

 

1 Thessalonians 5:21: “...but test them all; hold onto what is good; reject every kind of evil.”

 

 

There are also graces which God extends to those who are undeserving and afflictions which He allows to be visited upon those undeserving of them, such as monetary wealth or impoverishment and physical health or infirmity.

 

Ecclesiastes 7:15: “In this meaningless life of mine I have seen both of these things: the righteous perishing in their righteousness and the wicked living long in their wickedness.”

 

Furthermore, God grants intellectual prowess to those who have faithfully humbled their faculties to the One Who programs and guides them. The devil also grants carnal and worldly knowledge and savvy to his minions, but of a very limited range and depth. This, God's children can find some security and encouragement in.

 

Contrarily, the Prince of this World quickens the reprobate mind with all sorts of sectarian 'smarts' & schemes that pale in comparison to that higher knowledge which holds the keys to both Life & Death.

 

Romans 12:2: “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.”

 

Colossians 2:8: “See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy, which depends on human tradition and the elemental spiritual forces of this world rather than on Christ.”

 

James 3:13-18: “Who is wise and understanding among you? Let them show it by their good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom. But if you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast about it or deny the truth. Such “wisdom” does not come down from heaven but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice. But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere. Peacemakers who sow in peace reap a harvest of righteousness.”

 

The godly virtue of humility is rewarded to Christian disciples only after they have endured enough 'humiliation' at the hands of an unjust world. But the devil prematurely and eagerly promotes the proud and the wicked. Things work at a more organic and authenticating pace when the heavenly realms are orchestrating them. But in Satan's realm, all 'good' things come to those who plunder and pillage. But these 'good things' concern the ultimately meaningless strivings of the ego and the flesh.

 

Psalm 37:1-9: “ Fret not yourself because of evildoers; be not envious of wrongdoers! For they will soon fade like the grass and wither like the green herb. Trust in the LORD, and do good; dwell in the land and befriend faithfulness. Delight yourself in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him, and he will act. He will bring forth your righteousness as the light, and your justice as the noonday. Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; fret not yourself over the one who prospers in his way, over the man who carries out evil devices! Refrain from anger, and forsake wrath! Fret not yourself; it tends only to evil. For the evildoers shall be cut off, but those who wait for the LORD shall inherit the land.”

 

God grants the authenticated spirit of Charity to those who have been made repeatedly impoverished by worldly avarice & inequity. The devil opens his purse wide for any & all who trade their piety readily, for his ultimately worthless wares.

 

Proverbs 10:2: “Ill-gotten treasures have no lasting value, but righteousness delivers from death.”

 

James 1:14-15: “But each person is tempted when he is lured & enticed by his own desire. Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, & sin when it is fully grown brings forth death.”

 

Psalm 37:4: “Delight thyself in the Lord, & He shall give you the desires of your heart.”

 

God grants Peace to those who have known both discord & violence unjustly inflicted, but who resisted its naturally reactive outward trajectory. The Prince of Lies becalms the mendacious mind into a false sense of security only: “Buy now, PAY LATER.”

 

Romans 12:17-21: “Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord. On the contrary: “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.” Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.”

 

Matthew 7:13-14: “Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.”

 

God grants the fruit of kindness to those who've been scourged & lynched upon the sycamore of Cruelty. The Evil One crafts the wiles of his dark disciples to master the art of mere mimicry & charm. His apt pupils hide in the plain sight of status quo-at least until their mask slips.

 

Proverbs 11:17: “Those who are kind benefit themselves, but the cruel bring ruin upon themselves.”

Luke 6:35: “But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked.”

Colossians 3:12: “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.”

Galatians 5:22-23: “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.”

 

 

HOW NON-RESISTANCE TO NATURE SERVES THE ULTIMATE GOOD

 

 

What really is the force of evil? Of good? The devil? God? Are they really forces not unlike electromagnetism or Newton's gravity albeit on a quantum/subatomic level? Or is it perhaps a bit less compelling and mysterious as unseen principalities and the likes of such wizardry that the Judeo-Christian tradition accepts? Maybe it is all just the flow of cause and effect without any particular moralistic or spiritual significance or agenda? But then cause and effect require the interaction of living as in conscious and acting beings, or forces. With such a plethora of life reaching out for life and with the living things of the universe possessing such an obvious dominating role in life itself, how can this not possess any deeper meaning and ends? For not every cause creates the usual effect which we expect.

 

Moreover, due to the phenomenon of the human being possessing a will and most significantly, the freedom to exercise this will in their given lot, there are an infinitude of ways that humans can react to any given cause. And with our proven limitless imagination and capacity for invention, it seems that after all is tried against it, life just frankly cannot be simplified enough to satisfy those in want of absolute answers. But perhaps a deeper probe into the conceptual human psyche which defines these forces of creation and destruction that it perceives in the external landscape can bring us all a little bit closer to a singular and workable approach to the complexities of life.

 

In continuum, let us divert to our original questions of good and evil. Similar to the irreducible complexity of how life is lived and observed lies perhaps the most influential, not to mention archaic and inflictive paradox of life itself. Of course, I speak of the reliable observation that there are destructive, negative forces and happenings as well as there are seemingly creative, positive forces and events which compose the template of human consciousness which we call nature, the world or the universe. For most, a very strict partiality is maintained in the belief and assumption that neither evil nor good ever switch roles, or that they cannot ever interchange in their causes and effects. However, what I will propose in this essay will explore and suggest whether or not evil and good indeed can and do interact along with doing so oppositionally, synchronously as well.

 

Furthermore, it is important to begin by siphoning off any threads of doubt about my thesis by granting recognition to the fact that when we are speaking of the forces of good and evil, we are not perchance speaking of realities or actualities but concepts. Thus, this essay will approach its subject from a more existential, science of mind perspective. And as to the definition of reality and actuality, this would better be explored in its own separate essay. So, more on the classic Plato vs. Aristotle discourse later. But now we will focus on the even more ancient battle of good and evil or that old geezer God and his equally crusty archnemesis, Satan himself. The most common theme of the human condition is that concerning each individual's search for identity through meaning, and happiness through both meaning and a nobility of identity and existence.

 

To put it another way, the thing which we all end up devoting so much of our lives to is the answer to the age old ponderance of what is the best possible life lived. Primarily, where are the elements, after one knows what they are, that will aid in the construction of such a life? After this, how, once the ideal life for each person, both on an individual and universal level is constructed or known, does one live within only the parameters of this life? More specifically, how will one defend their life structure against the tsunamis of antithetical and nullifying effect? Or most importantly, will one maintain what one values while also perceiving lucidly and confronting neutrally, those things that are a threat to those values? For one surely cannot ignore them completely.

 

To use a common example to best clarify what I mean, let's say you have a brother who is homeless with nowhere else to go but to come and stay with you. Any decent, respectable human being of course, at first thought would take him in under set conditions of course. However, there is a conflict of loyalties not to mention a lot of other issues which might make it not such a good idea to do so for either just yourself or yourself and your family if you have one. Let's say that you do have your own family to care for which includes an infant son. In normal circumstances, there would be no apparent reason why this could not work. It may even, in fact, prove to be a blessing in disguise for maybe this new tenant could lend a hand or two with the house, the son, etc.

 

But in this case, the reason your brother has difficulty maintaining housing and employment is due to the fact that he actively engages in antisocial behaviour & endeavours. Now you see why this added element creates a conflict of morals and even if momentarily, nonetheless, a paralysis of will. For whatever you choose to do or not do will be the result of a lot of anguishing consideration. You love your brother and desire to protect him from the bad conditions of the streets and homeless shelters, but you also love your family and want to protect them from any unsavory influences as well.

 

One option would be to give him a chance to stay with you on the condition that he not associate with any of his dealers and that he look for work and a place of his own and also, of course that he not engage in those activities while staying with you. If he does this, you let him stay. If he doesn't you do all that you can, but do not enable him in behaviors which could be potentially fatal or deleterious for you & your family. But this is just a simple example of the ways in which each and every human decision is dichotomized into two or more often irreconcilable dilemmas.

 

Thus, one can see why it is so imperative that the subject of good and evil be recognized and explored. For no matter what we call them, these are phenomena that, without our comprehension and mastery over them, might cause our lives to flounder. The very act of breathing, however autonomic it may be, involves us in the game of existence. For the very nature of existence is two-fold. It is like the old riddle of the man who has never made a decision in his life. Obviously, this man decided not to decide! In the scheme of mortal life, even the negatives or the not-doings are loaded with their own implications. The point is we must face the fact that life is up to us.

 

Furthermore, we must equip ourselves with the power of as much insight as possible. We must do this, for our quality of life depends directly upon what we think and/or know. Although I must say, that the two are certainly not mutually exclusive, for what we think we know but do not know, or what we think we do not know but actually do know, fulfills the prophesy of itself whether or not it is true as the mind makes it true. So, thinking and knowing often make for strange and even quite combative bedfellows. Thus, one can see why finding a place of solid convictions about what one believes of good and evil is so essential. Because the mind is a wily creature that is never quite honest with itself about what it knows and even thinks or perceives. Having convictions is one of the starting points to living one's life. Hence we will now explore the various ways in which "evil" is defined.

 

First and foremost, there are two main branches of phenomenology. The 1st is the world of direct sensory experience, or the physical, material realm which we also refer to as the external world. The 2nd is the non-direct, abstruse, intangible realm of what we sometimes call the 6th sense of experience or intuition, and subjective perception, or most comprehensively what is offered up as that delectable, ever variegating smorgasbord of the human condition and experience. The first we can summarize and label "The Heart of the Matter," and the second, by doing a little flip-flop we can call it, 'The Matter of the Heart." And although the two subjects are generally mutually exclusive and cannot happily and peacefully coexist in one distinct and set template of observation, they seem to both desire the undivided attention of the mind and cannot be denied one for the other.

 

The lattermost phenomenon is what makes Sartre's ' 'Irrational Man" such a comical and equally compelling and often tragic character. It is also why we spend most of our lives not being what we are, but instead spend a good portion of it in keeping the duality within our being which it causes, in proper perspective. In continuum, it is only after we have learned to keep it all up in the air in a consistent cycle of suspension that we can throw more pins into the juggling act. The only way we can be at our best is in fueling the energy normally used in sponsoring our worst towards becoming better and better at being our best. And as with any goal in life, perfect 20/20 hindsight is more often than not, a nonentity.

 

Thus, a certain point must be reached through the natural process of living in order to first come to those insights essential to successful pursuit of our task. For if the sun knew of the rain beforehand, it just might steal all the clouds away. And if the prey always outsmarted the predator, well, I suppose that is self-explanatory. Which brings us into the 2nd most controversial definition of what evil is and is not. Heraclitus, the ancient Greek philosopher, was the first recorded to stress the significance of the interdependence of each thing to another in our universe. The way he saw it, evil did not exist. Instead, Heraclitus reasoned, that all things, just the way they were created to be, were good and quite harmonious in fact.

 

And concepts such as the pleasant, soothing reverberations of the term "harmonious" are not what we conventionally ascribe as synonymous with the concept of evil. This was the ahead-of-his-time genius that was apparent in these higher observations. It parallels what would come later in the first Chapter of the book of Genesis which stated that God saw all He had made and saw that it was good. Heraclitus managed to sound both logical and intuitive, respectably modern and appealingly primitive at the same time without compromising either. And Heraclitus was even perhaps the unembodiment of that anomaly hanging askance, the essence of Sartre's "Irrational Man."

 

Perhaps he had the secret to the art of reconciling coherence with contradiction in the human soul and mind. If he had, it is a loss indeed that he did not illuminate upon that or set that on record as well. This perhaps would have altered the course of human history itself'. Nonetheless, what Heraclitus did contribute to the leagues of ideology has given a very feasible alternative way in which to avoid the inherent dangers of fundamentalist theological conjecture and fanaticism. In a word, he showed us a good way of thinking of the bad. Furthermore, what other ways are there to define evil besides the Gnostic Manichean two-fold way of good vs. bad as light vs. darkness, respectively?

 

There are the Chinese forces of yin and yang, or feminine vs. masculine, respectively. The feminine force, or yin, is thought to be the passive, negative force and the yang, the positive, dominant force in the universe. Just another way to give us females a bad name. And this is not far from the synthesis with the majority view of what evil and good are. It is true that in most religions, a parallelism with the Judeo-Christian concept of a benevolent, creative deity and force existing in opposition with an antithetical, destructive nemesis exists. It shows a highly corresponding probability with the naturalistic characterization of evil and good into specific phenomenal laws.

 

Now, let me speculate abstractly upon what other possible ways in which evil can be defined. Let us totally reverse it for speculation. What if everything we now call good is evil and everything we now call evil is good? Oh, wait! This has already been said and done! No, it is being done as we speak! For the world calls bad, good and good, bad. I just hope I haven't committed the one unpardonable sin of blasphemy! May lightning not strike me now. But for speculation, what if all that we have been taught is wrong? Contrary to popular sentiment, I really don't think that humans need to be inundated with guilt inducing notions of damnation or salvation to be able to live decent, healthy lives. For many who see good and evil in different ways, even including God, are living virtuous upstanding lives. But the first commandment holds me to it: "Thou shalt have no other gods before me." And so it seems that I am already stuck in my ways. But I will do my best to transcend this very common human tendency, nonetheless.

 

Furthermore, another way evil can be defined is by calling it all of those words, body language and deeds or non-actions that get in the way of good being manifested through us and in the world. In this version, evil is the distraction vying for our attention at the expense of any mode of being and living which will promote the best things to be had and manifested during each our own human experience. Evil taketh away from all of the joy and peace that focusing upon and bringing about the good can bring. In the Judeo-Christian tradition, Satan is in competition with God for not only souls, but for disciples and followers. And whomever we choose to devote our utmost attention to, our souls will become property of as well.

 

There is the Scripture that one cannot serve two masters. And there is the Scripture that God is a jealous God. Then there is the Scripture which speaks of the tactics of the devil increasing, as the time is short on the earth for this age old battle. And evil does not always have to manifest itself in dramatically violent or catastrophic ways. In other words, the force of evil is at hand in very subtle ways as well. For example, there is the notion of good that one refrains from doing as being in itself an act of direct, although usually unconscious, evil. In fact, evil can be seen in its most pervasive form as a general apathy and indifference towards life. It is the apocryphal, deadly sin of sloth, sloth in physical motivation and slothery of mind and heart.

 

In the Judeo-Christian scriptures, God talks about spitting the lukewarm out of His mouth, for God rather prefers that we get excited about this existence which He has granted to us to do His works. Hence, passion, contrary to its typical controversial connotations, is a virtue in kind, and reserve, a sin. However, it is important to note that when I say "passion" I mean the purest form of it of course. The passion for pursuing the fruits of the spirit rather than those of the so-called "flesh." And likewise, if one is indifferent towards the right things, then lukewarm-edness is justified in God's eyes. For example, if I have a tendency to refrain from fornication then, although it would be rare for me not to naturally feel a desire for it, to cultivate and affect enough of an apathetic attitude towards it is serving the highest good for myself, God and others.

 

It is, for the most part, how we need to look at different things which will determine how our lives fair. Hence, the subtler ways in which the devil plies his trade are often the most effective and the most insidious. Often, to sum it up, evil is coddled by what is not said or done-in passivity. Much like the Chinese theology of yin which I mentioned earlier, with the feminine, passive force of the universe being seen also as the evil or negative, destructive force. This way of viewing what 'evil' is basically says that anything which somehow hinders or interferes directly or indirectly with any good that could be allowed to manifest itself, is evil. cannot be rushed. We must allow all to unfold as it naturally is wont to do. Live intuitively and get right with nature and all will be well.

 

And in truth, perhaps Anarchism is merely a more politicized & radicalized variation of Taoist sentiment, and likewise is Taoism a variant of spiritualized Anarchism. Furthermore, it could be argued that 'wildness' or 'savagery' is not an inciting or invocation of applied will. It is a giving in, a surrender to. For we are, wild of nature. We have always been and always will be. Thus, we must just give in to it. And the fact of the matter is, an embrace of primitivity is not what turns us into savages, but a denial of our raw, pure naturality. That is to say, that there is a certain savagery to civility. We are kidding ourselves when we point the finger at the methodology of communal refinement and cosmopolitan acculturation as the antithesis of man's moral deficiency and worldly afflictions of body, mind and soul.

 

And it is delightfully contrary to what the majority otherwise believes, that the very neglect of that so-called 'animal within' by the tyrannical demands of spurious attempts at socialization and fanatical homogeneity are the cause of every single ill which we instead project onto only our 'inferior' pre-historic (although this is a misnomer, for that, too, is a part of our history) identity, which causes so much estrangement from all that man can become, for the cause of good. We can transcend our nature only if we first learn to recognize it and let it be, peacefully, what it is. For in letting it be, we gain control over its inevitable tyranny over us.

 

Furthermore, over the years, many social, political and even material scientists have, through endless research, validated this hypothesis for themselves. Yet we still go on castigating the wrong enemy. For we do not believe that we can preserve our cultivated intellectuality, efficiency or sufficiency, while also kneeling at the shrine of our primordial leanings. To a certain degree, this is a legitimate anxiety, but only if one caters to only the superfluous surface interpretation of the human entity. This brings us to another derivative of our fear of all things archaic. Simply put, most people dare to go only so deep. Most persons go to great lengths to quiet that abysmal, esoteric entity's voice whenever it speaks to us from its dark, dank depths. But it reminds us, even the darkness is borne of the light. It could not exist without it.

 

And we have nothing to fear, for it brings one into a world and a way of experiencing which emanates with the light of a Truth very much its own. A light and Truth that is unlike anything we will ever know or crave again, once we have surrendered to it. A Truth and light which was borne of the Creator of both the light and the darkness, who Himself is light. The holy God created all of the transcendental and unrivalled wonders of our existence and the universe. The lights beneath which contemporary man gleans his esteem and spirit are not only glaring and deceptive, but in the end, are very unflattering to his image as a human whole, and perhaps this is why we still have not returned home to ourselves.

 

For it is assured that while man is in the light, he transports with him always, a mirror into which he can look with pitiable conceit upon his so-called superior self. And when the light turns, revealing the true form he has, all along, reflected to himself, others and his God, he forgets in his fright and rage, that even this self is just an image reflected by a different light. And he attempts to murder the whole self which he sees, only to end up with shards of glass in his third eye, and another seven years of bad luck to boot. For this has never ceased, this cycle of self-delusion and awakening, since his beginning.

As a matter of course, people the world over are serving time as we speak within this prison of the ideal self. Overall, we will never as a world community, get out. But we can choose to end the vicious cycle for ourselves. And when we do this we are also allowing for the Truth in others to shine forth. And this is the greatest, most civil, progressive accomplishment we can hope to achieve. For we are truly allowing our self, all of it, to be and to live. And nothing but the Truth, the whole Truth can set us free.

 

 

 

 

 

 

TRUE VIRTUE

Certain character traits and virtues once celebrated, nurtured and honoured have become increasingly denigrated and devalued. In Susan Cain's seminal best-selling book “Quiet: The Power of Introverts In A World That Can't Stop Talking”, she expounds upon the impacts that the industrial revolution has had upon society and Western culture.

 

The impacts which she speaks of mainly refer to those of a more 'intangible' nature. She makes a brilliant deduction about how those inward virtues and qualities of character which used to be respected and venerated, with the boom of a more commercialistic, and extroverted society rather than an agrarian and more pastoral one, began to become unpopular and less and less 'desirable.'

 

For example, purity of heart or 'congruency' and sincerity of intention in today's society and culture are often disparagingly regarded as being infantile, weak and 'soft-headed.' Although as anyone who possesses a true sense of things of a more philosophical and humanistic nature knows, the moral courage required to remain virtuous in an increasingly depraved world, takes the toughest-minded as well as the softest-hearted amongst humankind to actualize its vision.

 

Inward life, self-reflection, contemplation and the like, it seems, have fallen out of favour. Post-industrialist society is more about transient and hollow impersonations than it is about authenticity and integrity and depth of personality and character. It's more about instant gratification rather than tenacity and dedication.

 

Moreover, things have, as explored by Susan Cain, become less and less about the 'inner world' and more about the 'outer world.' And I believe this to be partly due to the human tendency to resist anything that one deems to be too frightening, or painful to acknowledge, especially as it relates to the inward psyche of each individual.

 

Of course, there are as many variations of the human 'species' as there are in the 'animal' kingdom, thus, self-reflection, more generally referred to as 'introspection' comes easier to some than to others. I myself, personally am more afraid of allowing the 'outer world' to master me, and thus have always sought to cultivate my inward personage and character.

 

And, I also happen to enjoy the process of contemplation, often intensely. Thus, different strokes, as they say. We must beware the devil's tactics to exalt those qualities which deserve our contempt or pity, and seek to honour and cultivate those inward virtues which make the world a much better and much safer place for our having been in it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

THE PEOPLE-WRANGLERS VS. THE PEOPLE WHISPERERS:

ON OVERT & COVERT LEADERS

There are two types of leaders in this world: Overt Leaders & Covert Leaders. Overt leaders are the types whose influence is both immediate & obvious.

 

Covert leaders are those types of people who lead without others even being aware that they are being led. Indeed this latter kind, are often unaware themselves, of the influence which they have upon others.

 

And interestingly, most Overt Leaders are more often than not the types who prefer to be led from without, by other Overt Leaders.

 

And most Covert Leaders prefer to be led from within themselves, preferring instead, a more systematic & subtle approach with others.

 

We are all learners & we are all teachers, each in our own ways. And there is more than one way be 'proactive' in life.

 

And whether or not you are a People Whisperer, or a People Wrangler, there is only one cliched yet tried-and still true mainstay you need to keep in mind: Stay true to yourself & you can't go wrong.

 

 

 

 

 

 

MANICHEAN MECHANICS

 

 

We learn compassion through surviving cruelty. We learn peace through surviving discord. We learn wisdom only after enduring senselessness. We learn how to see only after being blind for so long. We learn how to hear & to speak only after we've been silenced. We learn how to be generous only in destitution. We learn humility through humiliation. We learn progression through oppression. We learn how to be free only in bondage. We learn how to love after the devastation of hate. We learn how to serve others after the pain of isolation. We learn to feel again after numbness hurts too much. In the end, although Evil is a very real & destructive force, it, too, is under the rule of a Perfect & Holy God. Even the Darkness serves the Light.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

PURPOSE IN THE PAIN

 

 

I used to think that all of the traumas that we have endured, against which we have in some cases managed to hone into higher aptitudes & virtues of character, were a necessary part of that equation. But maybe they are not. It begs the question as to whether or not those who did not experience the horrors & the inflictions that survivors of all types of abuse have endured, could develop those things to the same degree.

 

Perhaps those who received the proper nurturance of their developing personalities & gifts in much more consistent & healthier ways, rather than deliberate interference at every impasse like survivors of emotional abuse, also demonstrate brilliance in each their own ways.

I suppose that survivors do have the benefit of that deeper sentience & awareness which aids in more transcendental artistic modes which non-survivors may not have access to. A lot depends upon the individual choice to take up one's own cross of self-examination & actualization in more productive ways, whether a survivor of systematic abuse or not.

 

All in all, I think that our trauma can, if we apply it in this direction, sublimate some of the more deleterious & destructive tendencies which survivors of all types of abuse are left to battle day in & day out. But I also believe that even those who have not experienced some of the more serious forms of abuse nevertheless carry trauma of some variation or another within their psyche just by virtue of being human in an evil & persistently injurious world.

In the end, it is pertinent that we just remain focused upon each our own given lot & self-actualization so that we can, no matter what we have or have not endured, become the most well-rounded version of ourselves that we can be in order to contribute best to the collective. This, is our highest honour & deepest calling.

WE ARE HIS

 

 

Sometimes we are afraid of awakening because we will become acquainted all that we have lost during our malaise and inertia. And all forms of loss bring with them, their attendant grief. But grief is truly an angel disguised as a demon. And our mighty Lord and Saviour reminds us at once, that He will restore all that the enemy has plundered and pillaged from us. He reminds us that the things that we think we lost are truly of little to no value anyway, being as they are

usually things of the temporal world and things of the flesh.

 

 

He whispers ever gently but powerfully to us: "No. my child, you have not lost, but you have gained. Because while you were toiling within your given lot, you were. in fact. storing up your treasures in Heaven. And what seemed to you like a living Gehenna was merely the bindings which I had to place upon your flesh for your own protection in order to complete my works in you." Complex PTSD and PTSD often steal years, and, for some. decades from us.

 

They can rob us of our ability to pursue our ambitions and our dreams. They can rob us of the ability to pursue marriage and family life. They, can rob us of the ability to feel our feelings. and achieve clarity within our thoughts. But one thing that Complex trauma cannot do, is rob us of the assurance and hope that we have in Christ, that He will complete His works in us, and that He is with us until the end. And as long as we take up our crosses and remain firm until the end, our salvation and deliverance are guaranteed.

But He also encourages us to honour our own grieving process and to keep asking Him for the faith and the soft-heartedness to remain open to His love, His chastening when we need it, and open to His healing. And if we do all of these things with a sincere heart and a submitted will, He will guide and protect us wherever we go, at least until such time that we must return unto Him. With Christ, nothing is ever wasted and nothing is ever truly, lost.

 

 

 

LETTER TO HERACLITUS II

 

 

‘Something went wrong’ is a concept from the intellect of man, not of the Divine.

 

At first male and female as He named them, did not need the pleasures of the flesh. They were in Paradise. They were one with all. They were whole.

 

Then they split in two. Nature became mired within false binaries & duelling dualities.

 

Now where there was the sun, they became conscious of the moon.

 

Where there was warmth, now there was cold.

 

Where there was water, now they saw a mere stone.

 

Where there was the quiet, gentle rain, soon came the thunder and the lightning.

 

Where there was the Divine, there lurked the savage.

 

Where there was Life, there also lurked Death.

 

Where there was creation, there lurked destruction.

 

Where there once was only union, there came division and betrayal.

 

Where there once was honor, there came debauchery & desecration.

 

Where there was peace, there soon toiled discord.

 

Where there was beauty, there came disfigurement.

 

Where there was delight, in due time, only disgust.

 

Where there had been light, now there was the dark.

 

Where there was pleasure, soon the scourging and affliction.

 

Where there was Truth, in roared deception.

 

Where there were sound bodies in sound minds, there soon encroached, pestilence and disease.

 

Where there was trust & faithfulness, in stampeded doubt & apostasy.

 

Where there was magnetism, soon came repulsion.

 

Where there was bountiful feed, there came wasting famine.

 

Where there was equilibrium, there came upset.

 

Where there was exaltation, there came denigration.

 

And what if anything went wrong?

 

What brought about this strange, cruel new world of warring & waste?

 

Or was it there all along?

 

Perhaps everything was still, perfectly that which it was designed to be?

 

That is not to say that humankind should not strive against those forces which are destructive.

 

But humankind must also reckon with those forces which are beyond its ability to tame & eradicate.

 

Each adult individual can govern only themselves and in so doing can manifest incrementally but surely, something wholesome & redemptive to the world.

For truly, it is never a matter of something that went wrong, but someone who went wrong. We alone create our world.

And in our fallen & fallacious mortal human state, we can only be aided by the Holy Spirit of the Triune God.

 

And though moral perfection cannot be attained, it need not be. Our Heavenly Father sent His only begotten Son to justify & sanctify us through belief in & submission to His will.

 

And in acknowledging it all just as it is, even the so-called bad, have we any hope of resisting the devil & his snares & wares.

 

For only in accepting all just as it is, can one transcend it. For if we willfully and forcefully reject it, it will only cling to us with more tenacity than before.

In order to rise above anything, one must surrender the struggle.

 

For even amidst all of the suffering and evil in the world, each thing has a beauty and necessity all its own.

 

The world is beautiful.

 

And beauty rewards those who recognize it.

 

And it is no doubt that universal laws, creative and destructive, physical & numinous, operate according to God’s Almighty plan and Divine, righteous logic.

 

Therefore, all is good, indeed.

It is all in the hands of the Almighty God who works all things out for the good of those who love & follow Him.

Amen.

 

 

 

THE SALVATION THRESHOLD:

On God's Grace & Redemption

Is there a point where a person becomes morally irredeemable?

Or is there some transcendent mechanism, perhaps more numinous, which is allowed within the life circumstance & heart of even the most degenerate & hardened amongst us?

In a word: Can ANYBODY receive salvation at any time, no matter how far they may have strayed or fallen or how egregiously they may have transgressed?

Or is there a “salvation threshold” that an individual can breach, whereby they have become completely incapable of the humility necessary for true repentance & sanctification?

Is there a threshold that can be breached where a person can become so morally desensitized where they have become irredeemable?

Earnest theologians & philosophers are often reluctant to condemn anyone currently still living, as irredeemable from a soteriological perspective.

The main reason for this is that it is, in a sense, placing a boundary upon God's grace & God's sovereignty & God's providence.

In other words: Can't God do anything that He feels the need to do in order to fulfill His plan, both collectively for humanity & individually?

This, for true believers & followers, is an apt, Yes! He can & He does.

Of course, God can't impose upon the teleological necessity of “free will.”

Nevertheless, in some circumstances, we have to concede that even some of the most evil individuals can still exercise their prodigality & repent & turn back.

Will this be a rare instance? Yes.

Is it completely impossible? No.

 

 

Moreover, the humility required for such an undertaking could most likely only be primed through the workings of prevenient grace, aggressively prescribed.

 

That is to say, it would almost literally take a “miracle” or some kind of Divine Intervention to truly soften the heart & open the mind of a morally impoverished or bankrupt individual.

And herein, I suppose, is where the human intellect & perspective reaches its limits. It is spoken in Judeo-Christian Scripture that God looks at the “inner man” when discerning one's state of virtue or turpitude.

Perhaps this is why that same Scripture warns mere mortals against making any kind of rash or final judgment upon any naturalistic or humanistic affairs.

Or, spoken plainly: We are not God.

In the end, we must also concede that God's wisdom, dispensed to us through the special revelation of His Word, is superior.

 

Furthermore, we must concede that His commands are both sound & foolproof.

Thus, if He tells us to await His final judgment of all things in Heaven & Earth, then we should do so.

This of course, does not mean that human evil should remain unchecked or unaccounted for.

It means that we should take up each our own cross of sanctification & allow God to guide us during times of persecution & conflict with other people.

It also means that we should indeed continue to pray for those who position themselves as our “enemies”, & that repayment of evil in the form of good is a much more efficacious strategy when attempting to influence one another towards truth & righteousness.

For even the most reprobate mind is not more powerful than a disciple equipped with the right spirit within them.

 

And even the most hardened of hearts may still soften at the touch of grace, painstakingly applied.

1 Corinthians 1: 4-8

(The Message)

Don’t imagine us leaders to be something we aren’t. We are servants of Christ, not his masters. We are guides into God’s divine secrets, not security guards posted to protect them. The requirements for a good guide are reliability and accurate knowledge. It matters very little to me what you think of me, even less where I rank in popular opinion. I don’t even rank myself. Comparisons in these matters are pointless. I’m not aware of anything that would disqualify me from being a good guide for you, but that doesn’t mean much. The Master makes that judgment. So don’t get ahead of the Master and jump to conclusions with your judgments before all the evidence is in. When he comes, he will bring out in the open and place in evidence all kinds of things we never even dreamed of—inner motives and purposes and prayers. Only then will any one of us get to hear the “Well done!” of God. All I’m doing right now, friends, is showing how these things pertain to Apollos and me so that you will learn restraint and not rush into making judgments without knowing all the facts. It’s important to look at things from God’s point of view. I would rather not see you inflating or deflating reputations based on mere hearsay. For who do you know that really knows you, knows your heart? And even if they did, is there anything they would discover in you that you could take credit for? Isn’t everything you have and everything you are sheer gifts from God? So what’s the point of all this comparing and competing? You already have all you need. You already have more access to God than you can handle. Without bringing either Apollos or me into it, you’re sitting on top of the world—at least God’s world—and we’re right there, sitting alongside you!

Acts 3:19

"Repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out, that times of refreshing may come from the Lord."

James 5:16

Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.

Luke 5: 31-32

And Jesus answering said unto them, They that are whole need not a physician; but they that are sick. I came not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.

James 5:15

And the prayer of faith shall save the sick, and the Lord shall raise him up; and if he have committed sins, they shall be forgiven him.

Jeremiah 3:23

Return, ye backsliding children, and I will heal your backslidings. Behold, we come unto thee; for thou art the LORD our God.

Luke 15:7

I say unto you, that likewise joy shall be in heaven over one sinner that repenteth, more than over ninety and nine just persons, which need no repentance.

Isaiah 53:5

But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed.

2 Chronicles 7:14

If my people who are called by my name humble themselves, and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and heal their land.

Psalm 51:13

Then I will teach transgressors your ways, and sinners will return to you.

Proverbs 28:13

Whoever conceals his transgressions will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy.

Isaiah 55: 6-7

Seek the Lord while he may be found; call upon him while he is near; let the wicked forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts; let him return to the Lord, that he may have compassion on him, and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon.

Jeremiah 26:3

It may be they will listen, and every one turn from his evil way, that I may relent of the disaster that I intend to do to them because of their evil deeds.

Ezekiel 18:21-23

But if a wicked person turns away from all his sins that he has committed and keeps all my statutes and does what is just and right, he shall surely live; he shall not die. None of the transgressions that he has committed shall be remembered against him; for the righteousness that he has done he shall live. Have I any pleasure in the death of the wicked, declares the Lord God, and not rather that he should turn from his way and live?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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